Disclaimer: I don't own the cast of Yu-Gi-Oh. I don't own the concept of Mary Sues. I'm not even sure I own the ideas in this fic.
A Misguided Mary Sue
"Ryou, I shall save you from your evil Yami!"
"But, but, I don't need saving."
"And Yugi, I shall save you from friendship speeches!"
"But, I actually like it when Tea talks about friendship…and other stuff."
"Joey, I shall save you from Mai's sluttiness."
"What, ya think I mind?"
"And Tristan, I shall save you from the monkeys."
"…Right."
The four boys stared at one another for several minutes before turning in unison to look at the fifth, silent figure in the corner. Said figure continued to type on his expensive laptop until the combined stares became too much, and he was forced to look up.
"Kaiba, what the hell are ya doin' here?"
"Working, mutt. What does it look like?"
"I think what he means is why are you here, specifically?" Yugi asked nervously.
"Because it's my mansion."
"Let's try this again. Why did Mary Sue put you in this room with us?"
"I'd rather not say."
Joey let out a derisive snort. "Prob'ly ta save ya from bein' an asshole, or sumthin' like that."
"Oh, I almost forgot," Mary Sue's voice squealed from the intercom system, "Kaiba, dearest, I vow to save you from those evil, icky yaoi fanfiction authors."