Disclaimer: You all know how it goes, Joss and ME own all the rights to the characters and yadda yadda yadda, however if Joss is willing to sell Spike, I might be inclined to purchase him for the right price;)

Author's note: Ok folks, here's how it goes: This story leaves off after End of Days. I put my own little twist on how they defeated the First, and the story begins after that. I hope it's not too confusing. Oh and just pretend Xander never lost an eye, cause I like my Xander with eyes, I'm weird, I know. Oh and one more thing, don't worry gang this story is Spuffy all the way, I promise!!!

Better Man

Chapter 1

Forward and Back

Satan, You know where I lie

Gently I go into that good night

All our lives get complicated

Search for pleasures overrated

Never armed our souls

For what the future would hold

When we were innocent

It was dark.

The moon, which was almost completely full, shown through the curtains showering a line of light upon his face. She watched him sleep. She always watched him sleep. It used to make her feel peaceful, at home, safe, but now it only made her lonely. It only made her think of him.

One year earlier...............

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They were everywhere. And she couldn't see them all, couldn't find them. And throughout the fight no matter how hard she tried she couldn't bring herself to stop fighting, she figured if she fought all the demons, killed them all, then the world would be safe at last. But it didn't matter, they only kept coming. And she couldn't find her friends.

"BUFFFFFFFFFYYYY," she heard a girl scream. She leapt up from were she had fallen and quickly ran towards the voice. She couldn't be sure if it was Dawn or Willow, she only knew it wasn't Anya.

Anya had been the first to die, and Xander had seen everything. He had seen the demon they called an Uber Vamp come at her and ferociously tear into her with its fangs. Only before it could finish her off Xander lunged at it with a sword swinging with all the strength he had, trying as hard as he could to distract the beast, but he had failed fatally.

Nevertheless Buffy still fought on. She fought, and she hurt, and she bled until nothing was left. She couldn't even remember how it had all ended, and maybe she wasn't supposed to. But it felt confusing and lonely all the same.

"Some mystical power.......", Giles had said.

"Something important........," he'd told her.

"It has to be done," they had repeated over and over and over.

"Or the world will-........."

She put her hand up to her face, rubbing her forehead. She tried to shut the memories of all of their words out of her head while she searched the wreckage. She had to find her friends, she had to see who was alive.

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It had taken her hours before she had found them all. Dawn was the first to be found. She was unconscious and her right arm, had been torn completely out of socket, but she was still alive, able to get up and walk. Buffy was thankful for that. They had found Willow next, but it took them awhile before they could get her to come out from where she was hiding, afraid she might hurt someone else with her powers not completely under control.

The three of them walked together for what seemed like forever until they saw Anya and Xander The couple was lying on the ground entangled in each others bodies, hand in hand. Xander had stayed with her until the end.

Buffy looked at the lifeless bodies of her friends and almost lost it, she felt herself begin to come apart. Willow sat, holding Xander's other hand, crying. Dawn was sobbing, and Buffy was losing control. Even with his strength inside her, she was losing control.

Suddenly they saw movement. Xander moved his head from were it had been resting on the ground and looked up at the group around him.

"Buffy he's alive," Willow cried.

"Keep his head still, we have to get him to a hospital now," she said searching the space around her for a phone or a vehicle.

And then she saw someone. Admist the rubble and dead bodies, she saw him. And he was carrying someone. Immediately she ran from her crying family to him, hoping against hope that he would be her salvation from all of the sorrow.

Because she knew deep down she hadn't saved the world. No, someone else.........

When she saw that he was carrying Giles, she could feel her other instincts taking over, driving her emotions to the back.

"Oh God......is he a-alive," she stammered out anxiously.

"Yeah, but I don't know what's wrong with him, he's breathing, but he won't wake up, we have to get him help.....soon," he replied.

"Let me get the others," she said turning around as quickly as her body would let her.

He watched her walk away, seeing her limp and hurt, a normal person would've been lying in a ditch unconscious by now, but she was strong....so strong. He could feel his heart jump at the fact that she had survived. He wanted to be able to protect her, be strong fo her, even though he knew she was stronger than him now.

"Buffy," he called to her softly. She turned to look at him. Thoughts running through her head a mile a minute. He can't be nice to me right now, he can't be nice, or I won't be able to hold it together.

She smiled at him weakly, desperately trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to spill over.

"I'm glad you're ok," he uttered, smiling back.

She looked up to the sky for a moment, as if she was thinking of something else, someone else.

"I'm glad your ok too.....Angel," she said and then turned around and walked away, back towards the others.

AN: So here I am sitting at my computer biting my nails nervously, hoping that you all liked my first chapter. So maybe you will do me a fabulous favor and write a review?! If you do I promise to give you cookies...... I will.......I cross my heart!!

And I know some of you are sitting there going, ' Where the hell is Spike,' just wait my pretties, the best is yet to come.