I read the Goosebumps books when I was a kid, but I wasn't really a fan of the series. I actually only read the books to laugh at how stupid and incompetent the the "protagonists" were in those books. It was just so pathetic how stupid they all were.
But Goosebumps was a part of me. However, I don't like it enough to watch the new 2015 movie coming out. Not even Jack Black can get me to see it. However, I am interested in it enough to write this little one-shot crossover with the PAW Patrol.
Happy Halloween!
Ryder and the rest of the PAW Patrol, minus Skye, looked in through the one way window into the interrogation room. The police had allowed the PAW Patrol to make use of the room, and Ryder to make a few modifications to it so it could safely hold their unique type of prisoner.
Rubble whimpered worriedly and asked, "Are you sure it's safe to go in there with the . . . you know."
"Don't worry, Rubble," Ryder said, "Those lights I set up in there put out light that's exactly like the Sun. If she tries to transform and attack me-."
"Dust," Zuma finished confidently.
Chase growled lowly and said, "Why do we even need to do this? Why can't we just pound an oak stake into it and be done with it."
Ryder looked sympathetically at the furious German Shepard. He knelt down and put a hand on Chase's back, petting him gently. "I know how angry you are about all this. So am I. We all are. After what happened . . ." Ryder's voice trailed off a bit as conflicting emotions ran through him. He regained his composure and said seriously, "If things are gonna get better, then we need to get some answers. And there's only one pup here who has the answers. If we want to help Skye, then we need to do this. We might have to make a few compromises, but Skye is more than worth it. Just follow the plan, and everything will be alright."
Chase growled some more and said unhappily, "I know, I know, Ryder. I'll try to stay in control. For Skye."
Ryder gave a small smile and nodded. "Okay then." Ryder stood up and said, "No job is too big. No pup is too small. Rocky, do you know what to do in case the prisoner attacks or the lights don't work?"
Rocky nodded as he looked at the remote on the floor in front of him with disbelief. "I can't believe all of this. I can't believe they're real, and now I'm building remote control garlic juice misters."
Chase shrugged and said, "Well, don't merpups exist? And you're taking it a lot better than I did."
Rubble, Zuma, and Marshall all laughed.
"Alright guys," Ryder said, "We're sure gonna have a story to tell everyone after this. Let's do this, Chase."
The door to the interrogation room made a buzzing sound as it unlocked. Ryder quickly stepped in and closed the door behind him, and it made another buzzing sound as it locked behind him. Ryder stepped over to the chair and desk where the prisoner sat. Ryder sat in the chair opposite the prisoner, and he folded his hands on the desk.
"Just to remind you, these lights . . ." Ryder said as he motioned to the two large square paneled lights against the wall behind the prisoner and the wall facing the one way window, ". . . are all just like sunlight. And your collar has a garlic juice mister on it. Just want to remind you, Fifi."
The pure white French poodle didn't even look down the collar. The poodle simply stared across the desk at Ryder with those dark eyes, sitting in an almost obedient manner. A pink flower graced the center of the poodle's forehead. Fifi took a moment to scratch behind one of her extra fluffy ears. Fifi's puffy fur wrapped around each leg, as well as the classic pom pom of a tail. She was small enough to fit on the seat of her chair, and was in the normal canine sitting position as she stared straight ahead, right at Ryder.
"Alright," Ryder said, and he took a quick breath to ready himself. Then he said, "You are. . . amazing, Fifi. You're something I would have never thought could exist. I guess . . .well. . . I . . . alright, look. What I'm trying to say is that a vampire dog is . . . amazing. I'll come right out in say it, I think you're cool."
Ryder gave Fifi his best smile, which the poodle regarded with vague disinterest.
Undaunted, Ryder continued smiling and speaking, "I understand why anyone else would be disgusted or afraid to the point of trying to . . . um. . . destroy you. A creature that attacks others and steals their blood does sound pretty scary. But the thing is, well, anything can be solved with a little friendship."
This time Fifi gave Ryder a look that silently said, "Are you kidding me?"
Ryder's smile twitched with the ghost of a laugh, and he continued, "Look at it this way. Humans eat meat. Pups eat meat. Meats are animals. Animals have blood. I'm sure that it wouldn't be hard to just talk to a farm and work something out where I can get blood from them. I doubt it would be that expensive. The point is, if you behave yourself, maybe let us train you, you could live right here in Adventure Bay. You could even join the PAW Patrol as a 'night rescue pup' or a 'paranormal investigation pup.' No one would ever know you're a vampire. We won't tell, and no one would probably believe us anyway. And you'd always have a dish full of beef blood to enjoy in the privacy of your own pup house. You see? No one will hurt you, you'll never be hungry, you'll have friends, and we'll all be happy! All you gotta do is help us out."
Ryder unfolded his hands, and reached out slowly towards the poodle. Fifi's eyes focused on Ryder's hand and followed it closely. Ryder gently petted the poodle's soft head.
"Come on, Fifi," Ryder said gently, "Choose the good ending."
After a few seconds of being petted, Fifi suddenly leaned back into her chair and away from Ryder. "Why do you think I am just a chiot?" she said sharply.
Ryder felt uneasy hearing Fifi's voice. It was a freaky mix of a French accent and a dash of wolfish growling. Nevertheless, Ryder nodded and said apologetically, able to figure out what chiot meant through context clues, and experience with Francois, Captain Turbot's French brother, "Well, I suppose you have a point there. You are a vampire, so I really don't know your real age. I'm sorry. If you take me up on my offer I know we can-."
"You have nothing to offer me."
The bluntness of Fifi's remark made Ryder speechless for a moment. He quickly found his voice and said in a coaxing tone, "Fifi, I came up with something that can make everyone happy. If there is anything else you'd like, I guess maybe I can sweeten the deal for-."
"I said, you have rien to offer moi," Fifi said with a rough growl in her voice, putting her fore paws on the desk in an attempt to make herself look slightly taller, "I do not want to hang around your bébé puppy patrol. I do not want to be your pet. I do not want anything to do with you."
"You wouldn't be my pet," Ryder explained, "You'd be a friend, and a member of the PAW Patrol."
"Will you open your petit little ears," Fifi said in annoyance and impatience as she settled down back into a Sit position her chair, "I really don't vwnt anything to do with you."
"But-" Ryder began.
"-You don't want to set me loose upon the world to put the bite on other poor defenseless humans or animals," Fifi interjected with quite a bit of sass in her voice, smiling at Ryder frustration, "Is that what the promise of bowls of beef blood are for? Or are they for that doux little cockapoo?"
Ryder frowned and said, "Please, Fifi. Don't do this to her."
"I did her une faveur," Fifi said as she began to take great interest in the claws of her left fore paw, holding it them up and admiring them as if Ryder weren't there, "She'll be very happy, like I am. . . or was until you caught me and decided to hold me against my will. Anyway, the point is she'll be invincible. Immortal. Stronger and all around more powerful. You said it yourself: vampires are cool."
"But you never considered Skye's feelings," Ryder said.
Fifi put her paw down and growled at Ryder, her canine teeth showing. For a moment Ryder was worried that she was going to go full vampoodle on him, but it appeared Fifi was too mindful of the sun lamps to try that.
"Have you considered my feelings, Ryder," Fifi spat, a bit of dog drool landing on the desk, which caused Ryder to lean back a bit, "Skye actually liked me. She liked my French accent, and she thought I was a bold and independent dog. 'A free spirit' she said. I didn't want to let a friend like that go, so I made plans to show her what and was so that she'd want to be like me. I could have convinced her if that fichu German Shepard abruti hadn't interfered. He ruined everything, don't you get it? Then everything went crazy, Skye was afraid of me, and I had no choice but to go ahead and bite her. I could have gotten her to agree to it, if it weren't for that meddling Chase!"
"Fifi, if you don't cooperate, we'll have no choice but to . . . do what heroes always do to vampires in the movies," Ryder said with a pleading look in his eyes.
"If you don't want to slay me, then don't. Facile," Fifi said nonchalantly, sticking her nose up into the air as she let he tail wag freely.
"I won't have a choice, Fifi," Ryder said, "We can't just let a vampire go unless we know she won't go around biting innocent civilians."
"And I want Skye to stay a vampire. She'll thank me for it later." Fifi gave a particularity frightening grin that made Ryder question for a second time whether the sun lamps really were enough to kill a transformed vampire. Fifi leaned forwards towards Ryder and said in a sweet innocent voice that contrasted greatly with her manic grinning facial expression, "It grows on you!"
Ryder narrowed his eyes on the French poodle and said, "You're willing to die just to keep Skye as a vampire?"
"Oui."
Ryder sighed and shook his head. He got up from his chair and walked towards the door.
"That's it? You're done?" Fifi asked in fake sounding disbelief.
"Well, I'm done," Ryder replied without looking back.
Fifi cocked her head. "What do you mean."
The door buzzed as it unlocked, and Ryder said, "Have you ever heard of the 'Good Cop - Bad Cop Routine'?"
Ryder opened the door, and Chase walked right in looking as angry as a werewolf pup. Ryder quickly left the room and closed the door behind him, which buzzed as it locked.
Chase marched straight over to where Fifi sat and slammed his fore paws down hard on the desk.
"Tell me how to cure Skye," he demanded harshly, a growl evident in his voice.
Fifi giggled, "Oh, you shouldn't assume, my dear Chase. You know what they say about assuming. It only makes an âne out of you and me."
"I said, tell me how to cure Skye," Chase said angrily, his fangs bared are his growled at the unconcerned French poodle before him.
Fifi sighed, "You really aren't too bright. What makes you think I know how to cure vampirism? Why would I know that?"
"So you don't know the cure?" Chase said, visibly calming down a bit.
"No. I don't."
Chase's heart sank. He had come in here hoping that he could get an answer. That Skye could be saved. But the look on Fifi's face when she said no seemed to seal Skye's fate. Chase almost felt like crying. . .
Chase's pup tag beeped and Rocky's voice said, "The lie detector we put on her collar worked. She's lying!"
Fifi snarled with rage as Chase smiled triumphantly at her, his heart rising up again with new;y regained hope.
"I still won't tell you," she said defiantly.
Chase slapped her across the face.
Fifi continued to look straight ahead. "Hitting me over and over won't make me talk. Je ne me soucie pas."
"Stop talking in French!" Chase demanded.
Fifi gave Chase a look of innocent confusion. "Why? Skye loves France." Fifi smiled sweetly, "The language. The culture . . ."
Chase slapped her again.
"I could give you some French lessons if you like," Fifi offered.
"Don't you get it!?" Chase bellowed in Fifi's face, "We are going to give you the full vampire slaying treatment! We'll stuff garlic down your throat, while pounding a stake in your heart, in broad daylight! If you wanna live like Ryder said you could, then tell me the cure!"
"You love her, don't you?" Fifi said with a smirk.
"What's important here is that Skye doesn't want to be a vampire!" Chase shouted.
"Give her time," Fifi sent gently.
Chase slapped Fifi a third time.
"It takes sooooo much courage to hit a girl," Fifi said nastily, her voice dripping with scorn.
"You're a monster who steals people's blood," Chase said with disgust.
"I'm no different than Skye right now. Would you hit her?"
"No! You made her that way! Skye hates what she's become!"
"That's your fault!"
"My fault!"
"You spied on me and made me reveal myself that night! She was terrified! I wanted to show her the wonders of being a vampire. We-," Fifi suddenly stopped in mid-rant, which actually surprised Chase a bit. Chase could've sworn he saw the poodle's eyes shimmer a bit. Fifi swallowed hard and continued with a slight tremor in her voice, "We were gonna be best friends. . . forever. Literally forever. You- you took my best friend away from me. You . . . fâcheux."
Chase stared at French poodle, suddenly no longer filled with anger, but not exactly filled with pity either.
"She really did want to be friends with Skye. That's why she wanted to turn her into a vampire? Wow, but, no, I can't let that happen to Skye. Skye would never have agreed to it. Skye was so frightened and scared and destroyed about what she's become. So much that she said she wanted us to- wait, THAT'S IT!"
Chase stepped back from Fifi and nodded slowly to her. "Alright, Fifi," Chase said, "Maybe you could've convinced her to be a vampire like you and I ruined it. Or maybe I'm right and she'd never agree to that in a million dog years. But it's too late for that. What matters is right now, and right now Skye is still terrified and begging us for a garlic injection, so-."
"WHAT!?" Fifi exclaimed, failing off of her chair and knocking it over in the process.
"I told you that she hated what she's become. What you did to her," Chase said seriously, "And I can understand where she's coming from. Having to drink blood-."
"Ryder gave me a whole spiel about getting beef blood for me to drink!" Fifi exclaimed and she scrambled up onto her paws.
"You're used to it. Skye isn't," Chase said plainly, "She also doesn't want to have to see all of her friends grow old and die around her."
Fifi stared at Chase in disbelief, "So. . . you're just going to help her kill herself."
"She was begging for us to give her garlic," Chase said, clearly upset by what he was saying, "She pleaded for it. She piratically threw a fit. You should've seen her. It was just . . . too much. We had to lie and tell her we'd give it to her after we've all said goodbye to her to get her to calm down. I know Skye, and if we don't give her the garlic shot, then we're just going to have to lock her in a dark room for the rest of eternity, because if we let her out the first thing she'd do would be to runn out into the Sun or fly up and land chest first on top of a pointy piece of wood. She's terrified. She wants it all to end. It's driving her crazy, Fifi."
"Support her!" Fifi screamed, "Be there for her! Help her to accept it! If you love her so much, then help her in her time of need!"
"I would and I could, but she's a vampire! Whenever one of us gets too close to her or tries to tell her not to . . . end it, she goes all vampire mode on us! Those teeth and claws and snarling and spitting! I can't talk to her because she won't listen! We only have three choices here: give her the garlic injection, let her kill herself, or lock in a room forever!" Chase felt himself shed a few tears of anger, shame, grief, and frustration, "I hate this! Skye is miserable and there's nothing we can do to help her! It's all your fault! You just bit her so she'd have to accept being like you. You never gave her a choice! you-."
Chase took a long shaky breath as he trembled with grief. "I don't know. I just- I won't give up. I'll just keep trying. Maybe, I don't know. Maybe."
Chase turned around and almost ran towards the door.
"STOP!"
Chase stopped, and made sure to turn around slowly to face Fifi.
The poodle hung her head and said somberly, "Six cloves of garlic, two shoots of Japanese Blood Grass, and five nightshade leaves. Pound everything into a paste and mix it all into lizard blood until it turns a light pinkish-purple color. If she drinks it all, she'll be cured."
Chase studied Fifi for a long moment, and then nodded and said, "We won't tell her what's in it, but I think she'd drink it anyway."
Chase turned to leave, but then stopped short of the door, and then turned back to the poodle.
"Hey, Fifi," Chase said a bit nervously, "Well, I guess, you aren't a complete monster. So, um, sorry. I guess you and Skye did become fast friends, so. . . sorry. . ."
And with that, Chase left the room.
Fifi didn't know how long she waited in that room. All she knew that two times during her stay, the door opened for a moment and a large bloody raw steak was slid in on a plate. Most of the time she spent in the room consisted of sleeping or just thinking. However, her thoughts were interrupted when the opening of the door brought not a meal, but a pup.
Fifi could tell right away that Skye was back to normal, that is to say, not a vampire anymore. It was Skye's facial expression that was unreadable.
As Skye quickly approached, Fifi looked down and growled, mostly at herself. "I'm sorry, Skye. You're my friend and I didn't mean to hurt you, I swear it."
"It's okay. I forgive you."
Fifi looked up with a look of pure shock as he beheld Skye's smiling face.
"What!? Just like that?" Fifi asked.
Skye kept smiling and nodded, "Yes. I can tell that you're telling the truth. And, well, Chase explained things to me."
Fifi winced. "What things?"
"How you wanted us to be BFFs," Skye said sympathetically, "I'd bet that vampires don't usually don't get to make many friends, seeing as people are afraid of them, and the whole immortal thing. I kinda understand why you wanted to make me one too. You didn't want to loose a new friend."
Fifi stared at Skye for a moment, then huffed and turned away. "You don't know the half of it. I've lost count of how many times a human has seen me and said how cute I was, then runs away screaming when I show my real fangs. Occasionally I'd bite a human and turn them into a vampire, but then they either still run away or hate me for what I did to them. But then I met you up at Jake's Mountain, and we just kinda. . .clicked." Fifi gave a sad sigh, "I thought that maybe I could convince you to become a vampire with me, then I wouldn't have to be alone anymore." Fifi looked at the concerned looking Skye and said, "Chase said you would have never ever let me convince you to turn you into a vampire, and that you'd rather die than be a vampire. Is he right?"
Skye looked saddened by this question, and she sighed and replied, "Yes, it's true. I don't think that whole dramatic scene between Chase, you, and I really changed anything. I would never want to become . . . something like that. . . um, no offense. And when you bit me, and I felt my body change, it just felt so . . . so . . ." Skye shuddered uncomfortably and said, "I'm sorry, Fifi. But I just couldn't handle something like that. I kinda lost my head in the aftermath, and I probably would've gone completely batty- ahem -crazy if they hadn't told me that you gave them the recipe for the cure. I . . . don't know how you got through your first couple of days as a vampire without going to pieces, but I guess everyone is just different."
Skye stepped closer to the French poodle and lifted her chin up with her fore paw, "But I don't care if you're a vampire. You're really nice after people get to know you. You're really funny and smart. You're bold and independent and free and just all around cool. And I really like your French accent. I'm proud to have a friend like you."
Skye looked Fifi right in the eyes and said, "So, that's why I really hope you go along with Ryder's plan. He told me all about it after I recovered, and it sounds just perfect. You'd make a great night rescuer or paranormal investigator or even both if you'd like." Skye smiled sheepishly and said, "And then I wouldn't have to worry about you biting any cute bunnies at night."
Fifi couldn't help but let out a small grin at that comment. 'Skye is just so innocent. . .' she thought to herself.
Skye smiled back and said, "I know you like being free, and I know there's still the immortality thing, but wouldn't it be nice to spend at least a few years with good friends? I'm sure I can convince the others to give you a second chance. Even Chase admitted that he might of misjudged you."
Fifi was silent at that revelation. She had her suspicions, but she didn't dare to actually think Chase was starting to warm up to her.
Skye closed her eyes somberly and continued, "But. . . if you really don't want to stay here . . . well, just know that I would never let them slay you. I know I can convince Ryder to let you go free once I tell them what close friends we are. I . . . don't think you'd bite anyone anymore. Because we're friends. I just know. You'd only . . . eat small animals. And in that case, I don't think I'd mind if you bit bunnies because . . .that's what you gotta do."
Skye opened her eyes and looked over at the white French poodle. "So. . . do you know what you're gonna do?"
Fifi stared at Skye with an expression of someone in the deepest of thought. After what she had done, what she had put her through, Skye didn't hate her. In fact, she sympathized with her. And now, she was giving her a choice.
Fifi went over everything in her brain, trying to come up with a decision that would work best for herself and her friend.
Then she made her choice.
At exactly 10 P.M., Ryder dropped a small raw steak into Fifi's food bowl. Fifi opened her mouth wide as her eyes turned blood red and a pair of huge fangs seemed to suddenly grow out of her mouth. In seconds, the vampoodle had finished off the steak, and she said with a chuckle, "He-he-he. Sure is lucky that I don't need a whole dish-full of blood."
"And that a cheap supermarket steak is enough to satisfy her!" Ryder thought as he smiled somewhat awkwardly as Skye chuckled a bit.
Suddenly, Ryder's Pup Pad rang. Of course, Ryder answered it.
"Hello?" he said.
"Ryder! You won't believe it!" came Jake's voice, "Something's been knocking over picnic tables and breaking tree limbs and stuff up here, and we think we've figured out what it is! It's a Sasquatch! You know, Bigfoot!"
"He's right! I saw it with my own eyes!" came Everest's part excited part fearful voice.
"Whoa! That's incredible!" Ryder replied, "Don't worry! No job is too big. No pup is too small!" Ryder pulled out the pull-out tray and hit the emergency button. "PAW Patrol, to the Lookout!"
"Ryder needs us!" Skye declared, as did all the other pups except for Fifi.
Fifi gave a deadpan stare and said, "He's right there, Skye."
Nevertheless, everyone ran over to the elevator, Fifi included.
"Here I am!" Marshall shouted as he ran, and of course, ended up bowling over Fifi.
"Oops! Sorry!" Marshall said nervously, "Not use to having a seventh pup in the elevator just yet.
Fifi growled a bit, but then gave a smirk and said, "You're just lucky that I'd never forgive myself for creating the world's first klutzy vampire."
"Oui!" Marshall said with a smile, and everyone laughed.
Fifi even gave a genuine grin.
And so, the elevator went up into the Observatory. Not long after, Fifi came sliding down the slide with Skye and Chase right behind her. She slid standing on all fours, her head leaning forward as she hissed with glee, her fangs shining in the night just like her pup tag, which showed the silhouette of a white bat against a black background. She flipped off of the end of the slide and landed in the cockpit of her dark grey pup house. The arched structure unfolded until it was flat on the ground, and parts of it retracted and wheels extended out of the bottom, turning it into a dark flying wing.
The tailless fixed-wing aircraft quickly took off, with Ryder and Chase following on the ground in their vehicles, and Skye catching up in the air with her helicopter.
Fifi smiled and said, "I'm all for letting time go reeeaaaal slow. . . for now."
The End
(The Vampire Cure is from The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion)