Until There Were You

by SwanPrincess913

"Sometimes it seems to me that the last thing I deserve is your love." "Sometimes it seems to me that you don't want my love at all, Sergeant Barnes." "The last thing I deserve is your love... hatred, loathing, disgust... But not your love. It'll blight you - it'll damn you. Like it always works with me." "It won't. Just let it be our salvation."

1. Prologue

… Best friends since childhood, Bucky Barnes and Steven Rogers were inseparable on both schoolyard and battlefield. Barnes is the only Howling Commando to give his life in service of his country…

A tall man – stubble upon his cheeks, cap over eyes – approached the mount with the photo of that very Barnes and those figures making a mockery.

1917 – 1944…

Another reminder of his past which is gone for good. Of that life – happy, carefree, desired. Of the fact that James Barnes is dead, indeed. He died in the forty-forth. Fell of the train. And he was gone. That Bucky was replaced by another version of himself – stronger, faster – Winter Soldier… HYDRA's most dangerous weapon.

The man swallowed. His shoulders tightened and the arm rose. His right hand pulled the cap all the way down. People crowding around didn't pay any attention to the young man standing right in the heart of the hall. The man so much resembling Bucky Barnes.

Barnes shrugged and left the Smithsonian hiding his face from all those people. Blocks away from here his belongings – a hurriedly packed gun, diaries, some clean clothes, penknife – were safely hidden in his temporary shelter. He had to use one - one of those dilapidated houses that should have been leveled to the ground like decades ago.

Barnes knew he could not stay there long. Maybe a night or two. Not longer. Otherwise HYDRA could find him. Could reset his mind. Turn into their weapon again. Like tens of times before.

But his mind was far from here. It was preoccupied with Captain America's last words – "Then finish it. 'Cause I'm with you 'til the end of the line" – awakening tails of memories, some pieces of the puzzle. Confusing. Disturbing. Bewildering.

Shivering, Barnes wrapped up in his jacket, rounded a corner and looked about. Coast was clear. No trail. No HYDRA agents.

Winding about narrow streets Bucky finally approached the house – three stairwells up and he is there. Safe and sound.

Narrow hall leading to the sitting room. The latter is furnished a la the '80s – a small room with a coffee table, a worn out sofa, two armchairs and a big armoire – everything is covered in thick dust. Web hanging down, dirt, layers of dust everywhere – all said he wouldn't stay here long.

Only one night.