Going through some stuff right now and I needed to get a lot off my chest. Thus this was born. Enjoy.
Draco shuffled down the dirt and rocky road, his feet sending pebbles scattering into the unknown as he gripped a white lily flower in his hand tightly, nearly crushing the stem. He was wearing a simple black shirt with black jeans, his hair was ruffled up as if he had just dragged himself out of bed which is exactly what he did before coming here. In his other hand he gripped the neck of a bottle of Fire Whiskey, half of it already downed, the rest swishing as Draco tried to keep his balance right which was difficult considering the world seemed to be spinning much too fast for him and he had even fallen a few times before, his shirt and pants smudged with mud and bits of leaves.
It was a windy day, the cold breeze was nipping at Draco's exposed face and it easily swept through his clothing, sending goosebumps crawling over his pale skin but he hardly felt it at all. He hardly felt anything anymore, ever since it happened, he couldn't feel anything. He wished to see his father, a prisoner in Azkaban, and have him scream at him, yell at him for getting bad grades, to punish him for not winning a Quidditch match, to beat him for when he disobeyed or let down the Dark Lord when he was forced to be a Death Eater. He'd go through all the shit again in an instant, he'd go through it hundreds of times, even millions, just to fell something, anything. Anything that would make this pain stop or make it hurt less.
He frowned and took another swing of the Fire Whiskey, trying to focus on the burning feeling that went down his throat and into his lungs but it never lasted long enough. Nothing he ever did lasted long enough. Every time he tried, to focus on something else, it never lasted long enough for him. He had dozens of deep scars and burn marks all over his body, forcing him to wear long sleeved shirts with high collars and long pants, all the time. No one knew about the pain he felt, they all thought he had moved on long ago but he never did. He couldn't bring himself to, no matter how much he tried, he always found himself being lost in the dark void that took everything from him, leaving him nothing but pain. He didn't even have tears left to accompany the pain he felt, nothing was left of him, he was just a hollow husk of what once was a human being.
Tossing the bottle aside, the glass shattering when it hit a jagged rock, he stumbled forward and managed to hold himself up thanks to a nearby tree. His stomach was doing flip flops and thought for a brief moment that he was going to throw up, and he began hoping that maybe he'd pass out and forget about everything for a little while before he was dragged back into this fucking worthless life and forced to live another fucking day of being absolutely pathetic. It never happened though, the alcohol in his stomach didn't come back up again and take him away, much to his disappointment. Cursing under his breath quietly, he looked over at the white lily in his hand and he noticed that he was trembling and shivering in the cold wind.
He began to wonder how his body still managed to react to worthless things when he couldn't even feel anything, not even the pain he inflicted upon himself and he slightly envied it for managed to be more reactant then he had been ever since it happened. With another curse, he pushed himself off of the tree and continued his walk down the dingy road, finally reaching his destination, someplace he hadn't been to in weeks, maybe even months and possibly even years. He didn't know how long it had been nor did he give a fuck about it. Nothing mattered anymore, not fucking anything.
He glared at the cemetery that was deserted as he shuffled down the small hill, almost slipping but he surprised himself with actually managing to make it to the bottom of the ground without falling flat on his fucking face. With a loud sigh, he walked shakily past the tombstones, looking for one in particular, flashbacks of being here quickly running through his mind.
He remembered the large crowds of people, the icy cold rain hailing down on him, someone trying to give him shelter but he simply shook his head and continued to stand in the tears of the heavens above him, he remembered the cries and wails of pain and grief, the pastor speaking softly as he gripped his bible tightly in his aged hands, he remembered the beautiful glimmering black casket being lowered and he remembered the last lump of dirt that was put onto the fresh grave, finalizing what he had been trying to avoid. He remembered staying there, unmoving for hours as his dead grey eyes read the large and bold black letters of the grey tombstone over and over again, just as he was doing now in the present.
He said in a shaky drunken voice that slurred, "…Harry Potter… Loving friend, wizard…" His voice got caught in his throat and he felt his eyes began to water up, before dripping down his face as he muttered out the last word, it barely coming out as a whisper, "…Husband." Touching his face, he was surprised to see the droplets of water on the tips of his finger, he hadn't been able to shed a tear for Merlin knows how long, and he collapsed down to his knees, looking at the gravestone, the image of Harry smiling tearing him apart, even though he was shredded up into nothingness.
Draco cracked a smile in the slightest as more hot tears poured down his cheeks, and he looked down at his wedding ring. He remembered seeing it in a shop out one day and fell in love with it in an instant. He was going to buy it but by the time he went back, it was already done. Harry surprised him later that night, proposing to him and he remembered that after Harry slid the ring on, he smiled brightly at him, and swore to love him forever until the he day he died. Fiddling with the smooth ring for a moment, Draco felt himself looking up again, said softly, his voice cracking,
"You know Harry…It's so funny…You promised me, we would always be together…Grow old, have a family and love each other until we died…We promised so many things to do together when we got married but then…" Draco let out a dry and emotionless laugh, "Th-then you died Harry, you fucking died and…and you left me here all alone you fucking bastard." He screamed at the cement rock, "You left me fucking alone Harry! Why did you leave me alone here?! Why, why, why, why?!" Draco felt himself break down and he sobbed, the pain in his chest growing even more and he felt himself slipping deeper into the void that had already almost consumed him entirely.
"You…How dare you Ha-Harry…W-we were s-supposed to be t-together..forever." He whispered out as he gazed up at the headstone, before placing the crushed lily in front of it. "D..don't you remember… Together f-forever…Always together…Forever Harry…" Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out his smooth wand and he pressed it against the photo, smiling weakly at the image of Harry who seemed to be smiling back at him, his smiling the only thing that managed to make Draco feel hopeful again, but this time, it didn't.
"And now…I'm going to be with you forever..because it's both what we wanted…and it's something I want… I cannot bear to be without you anymore Harry…I miss you so fucking much…I've already lost myself and I cannot get up again and force myself to live another minute without you by my side, something you promised you would do forever…"
He pointed the wand at himself, pressing it against his chest and he gazed up at the darkened sky that was looming over him. Closing his eyes, he felt the wind blow through his hair gently and he smiled mumbling out quietly, "I love you Harry...I'll see you soon and I'll be with you again...forever.." He clenched his wand tightly, his wedding vow coming to him and he whispered out painfully, one last tear rolling down his cheek,
"I, Draco Malfoy-Potter, will always remain by your, Harry Malfoy-Potter, side until death do us part and I adjoin you myself the day I die."
Avada Kedavra.