Title: The Pain of Loving You
Summary: It's been several years since Sokka's been to the Fire Nation. He never wanted to return, and when he arrived, he wasn't sure how to deal with someone he still was in love with. AU-ish
Notes: This may or may not be continued. So please don't give too much hope into it being updated. Oh and lame title I know, but I felt like naming it "Untitled" seemed weird...
Avatar: the Last Airbender is not mine.
It's been seven years since he's been to the Fire Nation. Several years since he's seen the place that brought him so much pain. He never wanted to go back, and if it weren't for his travelling campanions he wouldn't have returned. Ever.
During those seven years he travelled with Katara, Aang, and Toph, helping the world in whatever way he could. Sometimes he would return home to visit his father and see if he needed any assistance. It was a pretty normal life. He liked it. It could be better but he wasn't going to complain.
They arrived at the Fire Nation and he already didn't want to get off of Appa. He didn't want to. He didn't want to be here, it was too agonizing. He didn't want to see her--to see if she was well or not; to see if she was married to some asshole or not. He didn't want to see her happy while he was miserable.
He got lucky for the first day, but not so much the second. He turned around the corner and almost bumped into someone, before he could apologize he realized who it was.
"Azula."
"...Sokka."
"How's it going?" he wanted to get out of there, but he knew it was too late. He looked at her and she didn't really change much, sans her longer hair--that was not in a full topknot, but only half of it. She was still beautiful, and he was still in love with her.
"Well," she told him vaguely. "And you?"
"I could say the same," he replied just as vague, half telling her the truth in the answer.
"I'm glad to hear that," she told him. She still spoke and carried herself the same way, the same regal way that Lady Ursa; and Mai, the Consort Princess. He only knew one Fire Nation noble that allowed to show her emotions on her sleeves and that was Ty Lee.
He wanted to ask her many questions, but there was some part of him that was afraid to know. He wondered if she was eager to know about him as well.
"Mama! Mama!" Sokka looked behind him to see a little boy running past him, and leaping toward the princess. "Come on, the feast is starting."
Mama?
"All right then," she told the child before turning to him, "Sokka meet my son," Azula introduced the little boy. Sokka smiled, but he couldn't help wonder if the child was adopted or not. Probably not since he looked liked her. Though now he felt unbelieveable pain, since he realized that Azula had moved on with her life while he had not. Who was the lucky guy?
"Well I'll be seeing you at the feast I suppose," she told him, as she walked away with her child in her arms. His eyes followed her as she disappeared around the corner.
He knew he shouldn't have come at all.
xxxx
"How is the food?" Fire Lord Iroh asked his honored guests.
Sokka smiled, "You've got great taste," he told the old man truthfully.
"Yeah. Thank you," Aang commented. Sokka looked at Aang's plate and realized that even the non-meat portion of the feast looked delicious. Though he noticed that Toph was quiet tonight. That young woman never was quiet, especially when was Iroh around. They were friends, and in addition she always had something to say to Sokka. Granted it was a joke about him but nonetheless. He wondered if Katara and her got into a fight or something. It was obvious that Sokka wasn't the only one who noticed because Iroh interjected.
"Is something wrong?" he asked the young woman. Toph shook her head.
"No not at all. Meathead over there was right, you've got great taste."
Katara looked at Toph with understanding and concern, but Sokka could tell right away that his sister might have a clue on to what was going on. It was the same exact look that she continued giving him, because it was no secret to his little sister that her brother was still hung up on that crazy Fire princess.
It was really really annoying.
"May I ask you something?" Katara turned her head to the former general.
"Of course, anything."
"That child with Azula. Is that Zuko's child?"
Sokka soon found himself choking on his food and he had no choice but to spit it out, causing Toph to laugh for once that night. "I'm so sorry," he apologized sheepishly. He cleaned up the mess he made, and told them to continue on their conversation. He laughed for many reasons, really. The obvious one, that if the child is Zuko's then the mystery as to why the Fire Nation's royal family--for most parts was solved; in addition how would Mai feel about her husband having a child that wasn't hers; third he knew who's child it; and fourth, Zuko a father? Now that was funny. Could anyone imagine Zuko being a father? Then again...Azula was a mother.
To be serious though, would Zuko be like Ozai? They say that people usually follow the path of their parents. Then again, he forgot about Lady Ursa. But still, despite having a great mother like her Azula still turned out to be...well like her father! So did that mean Azula's parenting was similar to her father's?
"No," Iroh answered.
Ursa continued, "He is Azula's child."
Aang, Katara, and Toph dropped their chopsticks (though Sokka's was already down) and their eyes widened. Sokka remained quiet though.
"She's a mother?" Toph asked with disbelief. To be polite about, she turned her head to Ursa, "Congratulations, we didn't know you were a grandmother."
"Thank you," she said with a smile. Everyone, including Sokka, then added their congratulations to the woman about being a grandmother, and Iroh for being a Great-Uncle.
"I wasn't aware that Azula had married," Katara said cautiously, eyeing her brother from the corner of her eye.
"Actually Azula hasn't married. We've arranged several marriages for her and she declined them. At first she was all right with it though, but somewhere along the line she became furious and changed her mind. We didn't want to force her so we dropped it," Ursa explained.
"The child is adopted?" Sokka asked finally.
"No no," she said with a small smile. Was the royal family even allowed to adopt children because of their status? Didn't they believe that they and their family were sent from above to rule? Wasn't blood everything when it came to ruling? Though Azula wasn't Heir Apparent so maybe she was allowed to. "My daughter gave birth to him. Though she maybe planning on adopting soon," she laughed, "she told me her son's getting a bit lonely. And if Zuko and Mai don't have children anytime soon--the child won't have anyone to play with."
Sokka's mind screamed to ask for more information. He wanted to know the truth; he wanted to know what happened; who was the father? Was he still around? Did Azula love him? Though of course, that would be rude to bombard them with personal questions when they were nothing but friends.
xxxxxxx
When the dancing began, everyone seemed to pair off: Iroh with Ursa; Aang with Toph; Zuko with Mai; Ty Lee with Haru; Azula with her son; and him with Katara.
"I still can't believe Ty Lee and Haru," Katara commented. "I'd never thought that she would be swayed to leave you alone. I'd never thought he'd fall for her."
"Tell me about it," he laughed. Ty Lee had been infatuated with Sokka and somewhere along the line it stopped. In the back of his mind he wondered if Azula had anything to do with it.
"I'm sorry Sokka--"
"No. Don't be. So," he began as he saw Aang and Toph together, they looked liked they were bickering. "Are you gonna tell me what's going on with those two?"
"I don't really know. I have an idea though..."
"What?"
"...Well...As you must've noticed------"
"Oh yeah?! Well you're annoying too!" Aang yelled after his dance partner, following her out into the hall.
"Maybe we should go check on them--" Sokka said, as he and his sister followed after the youngest members of their family.
"What's your problem Toph?!" Aang demanded.
"You!"
"What the hell did I do this time?!"
"Guys what's going on here?" Katara asked. "It's not polite to our hosts that you guys decide to fight now and here!"
"I'm sorry Katara," Aang rubbed his neck.
"I'm outta here. Goodnight," she walked off toward the stairs.
Katara looked at Aang for an explanation but got none. Sokka sighed, those two were always in fights, what makes this any different? Tomorrow they would be fine again. That's how it was with those two. Fight and make up. The three of them returned to the dance floor and apologized to the rest of the guests and continued on what they were doing before. Sokka and Katara talked some more, and of course they avoided the topic of Azula. Though that wasn't always so easy since she was right there.
xxxxx
Toph sighed, not knowing what to do. She was angry with herself and she was angry with the Avatar, because if it weren't for Aang then she wouldn't be in this predicament; and if it weren't for her, she' also wouldn't be in this situation. She should have better self-control of herself, but she couldn't help it. She heard him come in and hesitantly take a seat next to her on the window sil.
"Toph what's really going on here?" he asked quietly demanding to know. A few years ago, he would've probably apologized as soon as he came in. However he learned long ago, Toph didn't take too kindly to 'wimps.'
"Nothing. I'm just frustrated we're here. I wanna be out in the road again--"
"You're lying," he concluded right away, his tone pushing her to tell him.
"Alright, alright! Geez," she exhaled. "Just forget about it."
In other words, she was sorry about earlier tonight.
They talked about trivial things such as the food that was served tonight; Mai and Zuko and how weird it was to see him with someone; Ty Lee and Haru and how those two seemed right and yet so wrong for each other; Azula's child and who the father could be and how her family felt about that; and Sokka's awkwardness.
Somewhere along the way though, their conversation was moved to the bed where it was more comfortable.
"So when will we be heading out again Twinkle Toes?"
"Why are you so eager to leave Toph?"
"Nothing but walls."
"Oh come on, it can't be that bad here. Well go out riding or something--or maybe we can go to their beach house."
"Are we on a vacation?" she asked him, because she wasn't aware they were having their 'mini vacations' and spending time in the Fire Nation didn't seem like a 'mini' vacation.
"Toph why don't you take it easy? Things have settled a bit for us, so we can relax can't we?"
She frowned and did not answer him. Aang smiled as he gazed upon her face. "You look really pretty tonight."
"Don't think flattery's gonna get you anywhere," she told him.
"No seriously!" he told her, causing a small smile to appear on her face. They talked some more, until it got late and Aang turned to go.
"Don't," she whispered tiredly. "Stay with here."
"Toph," he said warningly. "That's not appropriate."
"Psh posh Twinkle Toes. We aren't doing anything."
He found himself complying, unable to say no.
xxxxxxxxx
Azula, after seeing to her child and tucking him into bed--where Grandmother Ursa read him a story, the princess decided to get some fresh air on one of the balconies. There was a lot to think of, and Azula knew that she should've read her son the story this night to take her mind off those things. After all, she and her mother may have alternated reading to the child, but it was never stated which nights were hers and which were Ursa's.
However, there was no helping it now. Her mind was filled with thoughts of him and the past. It ended soon though when she heard footsteps, coming to accompany her. The two stayed silent for awhile before Sokka spoke.
"So you have a child huh?"
"Yeah. Do you?" she asked.
"No."
"A wife?"
"No."
"Girlfriend? Lover? Anything?"
"Katara, Toph, Aang, Appa, and Momo. They're enough for me."
"I suppose," she said with a smile. "Friends are forever."
"Yeah they are," he told her coldly, he wanted to add: unlike some things, but decided against it. "So I heard that you've had several arranged marriages and yet you denied them all. Did you ever marry?"
"No."
"Then...the child...?" he asked hesitantly.
"Sokka I've had lovers and forgot to be cautious. That's all," she answered casually.
"I"m surprised that your family didn't strangle this guy."
"Well they aren't like that. I'm surprised they didn't strangle me."
"Come on, don't say that," he told her somberly. Her family wasn't that bad, they didn't hate her so much.
"Sokka I'm surprised you came," she said, diverting the question. "I thought..."
"Yeah. Me too. Truth be told I wouldn't be here if it weren't for Aang."
"It's nice that you care for them so much."
"It's nice to that you care for your son so much."
"He's the only thing I have."
"That's not true."
"Yes it is," she said with such strong conviction.