"The Spoony Experiment"
Note: Sometimes when I'm just sitting around doing nothing, or more likely watching somebody else do something, I'll get a burst of inspiration and just have to write whatever pops into my head down. All Characters portrayed within are the respective properties of the personalities who work at Channel Awesome, with the exception of Trevor who belongs to Sierra Entertainment.
All events portrayed within are entirely fictional, and any similarity to real events would be totally awesome. Heads up though, there's going to be mild swearing, mild violence, and comic mischief so those of you with weak stomachs should probably have nothing to worry about.
I actually feel kind of proud of this, and if any of the people portrayed within actually read this I just want you to know you guys are totally awesome and I hope you like it.
Prologue: Benzaie
It was near three in the morning in a small town in France. Many of the apartments along the cobbled road had darkened windows, but one lone flat had a small glow emanating from it.
Which was odd, because that particular one was usually lit up like a Christmas tree at all hours.
The locals avoided that particular apartment's occupier. It was said he was mad. Concerned parties left food at his door, and in return he rarely ventured out to make mischief anymore. By now they had learned not to complain about the smell...
Benzaie, l'homme qui interrompre.
The blinding fluorescent lights were turned out for the first time in year, but a small lamp shone brightly upon the desk where Benzaie worked. The ethereal radiance made the totems on his wall look sinister. The man himself looked the part of a madman, his eyes bloodshot and he pored over the casing of wires and circuits. He had gone through much top obtain this evil-looking electronic device.
Actually, it looked more like an X-Box remote.
"Beary, I do believe I have discovered what is amiss—"
"Now I know what you are thinking, "Benzaie, how can you be zo smart?"—"
"Insano's science is impressive, but with ze right know-how I can use it towards my own ends."
Beary looked back at his Brother, Father, and Lover and sighed. It had been months since they had scoured the burn out ruins of a house for the corpse of the Spoony One. The body was never found, and soon the man in brown—What was his name? Linkara. Linkara had cloned Spoony using the genetic material he had scavenged. Benzaie, however, found within the detritus something he found very interesting indeed.
"Benzaie, I don't like it, please put it away."
"Not now, I am zo close—"
"Hand me zose batteries, would you?"
Beary slumped against the window. Actually, slumping was all the poor ursine could do, as he was over 80% ass. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a group of people enter the building. Strange, he thought, The Deletours aren't the sort for late night jaunts.
Sparks emitted from the workbench as Benzaie made the finishing touches with his soldering iron. Beary could hear heavy footsteps begin to move up the stairs.
Benzaie gingerly clicked the fission batteries into place and replaced the casing. Beary saw shadows appear behind the door.
"Victory!" Benzaie thrust the time compressor into the air triumphantly.
BLAM! The bolt flew across the room as the door sprung open, interrupting Benzaie's victory dance. Benzaie dropped the Time Compressor in fright, but a look of befuddlement washed over his face as he recognized the silhouetted figures.
"Angry Joe! Hope within Chaos! What are you doing here?"
"Late at Night?"
"In France?"
Angry Joe's eyes were still shrouded in darkness, but heis wide grin unnerved Benzaie. The monolith that was Hope remained stone faced. Slowly the two walked forward, and in the small light of the desk lamp Benzaie could see that they both wore matching goggles. HIS Goggles. Insano's Goggles. Benzaie found himself rooted to the ground in fear as the two grabbed him and pinned his arms to his sides.
"Joe! Hope! Fight zis, I know you can!"
"Oh, please." Said a new voice, still hidden behind the doorway. "If Joe and Hope can't resist, who could? You'd have to be blind not to see."
Benzaie's fear turned to terror as Linkara, his friend, stepped from the hall outside. He too wore the sinister goggles.
"No…" uttered Benzaie
"The Master wishes you good health Benzaie, and would like to thank you for completing the time compressor. You'll have a high position as one of the disciples once you hand it over. Now, if you would…?"
"Th-the Time compressor? Ooooo…" Benzaie looked down where he had dropped it, but to his amazement it had vanished. There was a squeak noise from the window and the four turned to see a plump snowy ball squeeze its way through the small crack it had made.
"Beary, No!" Benzaie shouted as Angry Joe lunged towards the winds. He made a grab for the bear but clutched only air as Beary and the Compressor tumbled towards the street below, into the darkness. Joe made a move towards the door, but Linkara stopped him with a hand, as he put his other one to his goggles.
"Yes, you saw what happened? Yes, it was the chubby polar bear. O.k., roger that. And Benzaie? Excellent, thank you Master."
Linkara turned to Angry Joe. "The bear is small and knows the area too well, we'll never find him. However, our benefactor has an idea of where he may go, with any luck we will be able to route him as well as dig up another pawn."
He turned back to Benzaie and reached into the pocket of his blazer. "Do not worry old friend. Though your bear will suffer dearly for what has happened, The Master would like to thank you for your co-operation. You've gained a well deserved spot in our leader's army." He pulled out an identical pair of the villainous eyewear.
"Linkara…No…please…" Benzaie pleaded.
"Just open your eyes Benzaie" Linkara told him as he slipped the goggles onto his face "And when you open your eyes, the beauty of my plan will be revealed."
Benzaie felt a sharp pain run up through his eyes and into his brain as the goggles locked onto his ears and over his eyes, and then everything went black.