I know I'm not supposed to be writing, but this isn't a story. It's the truth.
I've been crushing on the same guy for eight years now and won't let go. He knows I like him. When I finally told him, he said he suspected it the whole fricking time! I was kinda ticked at that... But he still talks to me like a good friend.
PS: he's the same guy I asked to Sadies.
Only a day since I last saw him, but a week since I talked to him.
He is the only light I see in the dark of my dreams.
One dream, I risked my life for him. Another, he confessed his love for me. But they are only dreams. Things that will never be.
There are times I wish he could be the One. But I open my eyes and see him across the quad with his friends.
I had the guts to tell him, to ask him to the dance, to be able to talk to him again . . . but not to know how he feels.
I tell him over and over again in my dreams, and he says the same to me.
He doesn't in reality.
If dreams were reality, I'd be in heaven with the guy I've longed for.
Then reality hits me again. In the face. Hard. It kills my heart.
Will he ever see me the way I see him?
Or will I be alone in life, only thinking of him until I die?
There is no way to really know.
He is in my dreams, and that is all I need for now.
I can never be his girl. He will never be my guy. It hasn't killed me yet.
He said yes to the dance. He accepted my feelings for him.
But will not be more than friends.
I don't mind. I still love him.
We just weren't meant to be.
If fate decides to turn the tides, and sew our strings together, then so be it.
But until then, I will love from afar.
I will smile when I see him. My heart will ache for him, but will keep going.
Eight years hasn't changed anything. Twenty or thirty more won't either.
For he will always be my One. Until the end of time itself.
Love hurts when you fall for someone. Take it from one with experience. But don't give up your first love. You learn so much from it.
Believe in and follow your heart. It is never wrong.