Disclaimer: Thomas the Tank Engine does not belong to me.

Thomas and the Supermodel

Thomas has been running his branch line for a long time, now. He's almost never late to any of the stations and the passengers are complacent as they ride along in his coaches, Annie and Clarabelle. But as with all things that run on a schedule, it doesn't always go so smoothly.

One day, Thomas was waiting at the station that connected his branch line to the main line. James was supposed to have arrived with his train, but he was twenty minutes late.

"Damn it!" Thomas fumed, "James never takes this long. Where the hell could he be?"

Finally, James' whistle sounded and he pulled into the station. He looked tired, "Sorry, Thomas. I tried to get here as quickly as I could."

"What took you so long?" Thomas snapped, "Did you put a hole in one of your coaches' brake pipes again? You and those damned bootlaces."

James let off steam angrily, "You git! It was nothing of the sort! There's a celebrity on my train, and I was late because of her!"

"A celebrity?" Thomas asked curiously, "We've never had one of those on our line that made a train late. They usually respect our need to run the trains on time."

"Well, this celebrity is a fashion model from America. She's on a tour and held up my train at the big station!" James looked onto the platform. "See?! She's doing it again!"

Thomas observed as the model took suggestive poses and the people at the station (mainly men) took pictures. The conductor blew his whistle time and again, but no one would get into Thomas' coaches.

"Why didn't you just leave the station if the passengers refused to get onto your train?" Thomas asked James, "The passengers would've blamed her for her flaunting."

"That's what I said," replied James, frowning, "But driver said that if we did that, the model would blame Sir Topham Hat, and then no one would use our railway."

Thomas gritted his teeth as the model continued to flaunt about the station, signing autographs and posing for pictures. She even had the nerve to pose using the side of his boiler as a background! He angrily shot off a jet of steam at her.

"Thomas!" his driver snapped, "Don't! Remember what James said!"

The model, however, didn't realize that Thomas was angry at her. Instead, she coyly turned to her gawking fans and said, "Well! It seems I can arouse steam engines, too!"

They all laughed, and Thomas grew very angry.

At last, the model casually walked up to the door into Annie and entered. The rest of the passengers quickly followed.

The conductor blew his whistle and Thomas was off.

"The nerve of that woman!" he grumbled as he puffed forward, "She thinks she owns this railway!"

"Don't worry, Thomas," chanted Annie and Clarabelle, "she'll be gone tomorrow."

Thomas made it to the last station on his branch line, and the model got off onto the platform.

"Come on, Thomas," said his driver, "We'll let Bertie deal with her."

Thomas, heaving a sigh of relief, put Annie and Clarabelle onto a siding before going off to the shed.

The next day, however, James was late again.

"Oh, bugger me!" groaned Thomas as the supermodel got off James' train and started posing again. "I thought she'd be gone by now!"

"I'm afraid not," James replied, "Apparently, she thought that your branch line was so beautiful, she needed to see it again."

"Normally I'd feel complimented when someone says that my branch line is beautiful, but hearing it from that tart makes me wish I were still shunting at the big station!"

"You should've seen Percy," grinned James, "He was absolutely embarrassed when the model used his curvy frame to show off her flexibility."

"I'll have to get him to tell me about that sometime," Thomas snorted, "Sometime after the model's left Sodor for good."

The model got tired of posing for pictures and climbed into Annie once more, and Thomas almost knocked the conductor off Clarabelle, starting off as fast as he did.

A few miles down the line, they came to a signal set at "Danger." The signal was in front of a rather isolated signal box in the middle of some farm land.

Thomas scowled impatiently, "First the model, now this! Why does this happen to me? Why?"

The conductor went up to the signalman to see what was the matter.

"What's the matter?" growled the signalman, "I'll tell you what the matter is: my job. Sir Topham Hat wants me to run this signal box all day with no breaks, nobody to relieve me, and no places nearby that I could go to even if I had such relief! I don't even have a minifridge to keep my lunch in!"

"So you're obstructing the railway because of that? What about the passengers?" argued the conductor.

"Fuck the passengers," Snapped the signalman, "I'm on strike."

They continued to argue, and then the passengers got out and started arguing with the signalman too. Finally, the supermodel came forward, obviously unhappy that no one would take any interest in her, "What's going on?" she pouted.

The signalman looked at her in disbelief, "You're that model, aren't you?"

The model replied, "Yes, but why are you holding up my train? I have places to be, you know."

Thomas snarled at the model calling it her train.

The signalman seemed to be hesitating, but then he grinned, "I have an idea. If you're willing to let me... interview you, then maybe I'll put the signal down and let the train keep going."

Thomas was confused at first, but then it occurred to him what the signalman was up to. Normally, he'd see this kind of scheme as foul, but he didn't mind when it came to that model. He grinned to himself.

The model, however, didn't seem to catch on, and she looked like she was about to politely refuse, but the passengers urged her, and some got their cameras ready.

At last, she agreed. The signalman started leading her up to the signal box, but turned to the rest of the passengers, "I don't want to be disturbed. When I'm done, she'll come back down to the train and I'll drop the signal. But if any of you get any bright ideas, it'll take me a longer time to finish, understand?"

The more eager of the passengers sighed disappointedly and climbed back into the coaches.

Ten minutes passed. Thomas was already very late, but he didn't mind. He hummed a little tune to himself to pass the time.

Finally, the model came out of the signal box, her head hanging in shame. She climbed down the stairs and got back into Annie.

The signal dropped and Thomas started down the line once more.

The next day, things ran smoothly. James arrived early at the junction, smiling gleefully. "Thomas! Have you heard the news? That supermodel's announced that she's quitting her job!"

"Really?" Thomas asked innocently, "Why would she ever do that?"

"I don't know, but I'm guessing she came to her senses and was ashamed of all those lewd pictures that she posed for."

"I'll bet she was," Thomas agreed, "Oh, and on that note, one of my signalmen obstructed my train yesterday."

"Really?" asked James, "Why?"

"I don't know, but driver tells me that Sir Topham Hat fired him because of his impromptu strike."

"Those signalmen don't realize how easy their jobs are. I've known a good few that just go to sleep at their posts!" James mused.

"Agreed," said Thomas, "But I have my own reasons to give this one some credit."

Before James could ask Thomas what he meant, the conductor's whistle blew, and Thomas went off to run his train on time.