Disclaimer: I do not own DB/Z/GT

A/N: Not really to sure how describe this one. Ramblings, musing maybe? I don't know, but I like it, and I hope that you do to! The first draft was written at something stupid like 2am while my daughter refused to sleep, but I think (and hope) that it got better during the edit after a few hours of decent sleep… aaah motherhood…who would do it, honestly…lol

Enjoy

-D.B

First Encounters

Krillen sat bolt upright, gasping madly for air. Everything around him was black and for a brief moment he was unsure of where he was.

"Krillen?" a voice came from the blackness. A light flicked on, and instantly the room lit up, coating everything in a comforting, warm yellow glow.

"Krillen, are you okay?" 18 mumbled as she rubbed her eyes. Clearly she had been woken from what had been a peaceful slumber.

Slowly, Krillen took several long deep breaths, until his hands were not longer shaking and he was completely sure of his surrounds.

"Yeah," he ran his fingers through his hair, which was dampened with sweat, "it was just a nightmare, nothing to worry about. Go back to sleep, I'm fine" he forced a smile for 18.

"Wanna tell me about it?" 18 asked, knowing all to well that if Krillen didn't get this out of his system now, he would be tossing and turning for the rest of the night, and then neither of them would get any sleep.

"No." Krillen lied. 18 needed her sleep and he didn't want to burden her with his problems "it's ok, it was just a dream"

18 grimaced. Usually it was Krillen who had to coax her into talking, very rarely was it the other way around. Settling back down against her pillow 18 gazed up at Krillen, he still looked so troubled.

"Usually it's me with the nightmares, not you" she mused, more to herself than to Krillen.

"It's been happening a lot these past few weeks" Krillen muttered, as if he were deep in thought

"Really?" 18 asked; intrigued by this revelation, "what are you afraid of?" she asked softly.

This time, Krillen turned to look at 18 before he replied; he gazed at her lovingly, taking in every last amazing detail.

"I'm scared of losing you"

"What?" 18 sat back up and blinked, suddenly wide awake. "I'm not going anywhere, Krillen, you know that." She took his hand in hers and gave it a gentle squeeze to reinforce the point.

"I know," Krillen sighed, "but deep down, I am terrified of someone taking you away from me. I don't think I could go through that again"

18 raised an eyebrow, now she was confused. "Again? What do you mean again?" she asked.

"That's what I've been dreaming about," Krillen explained. "The first time I lost you." He paused before he continued; he was unwilling to continue the train of thought because he knew how much 18 wasn't going to want to hear it.

"I dream of the day you were absorbed by Cell"

18's eyes widened and she looked at Krillen in complete and utter shock. She had no idea – none what so ever, that that horrible day had had a lasting effect on him

"It was one of the worst things I have ever experienced" Krillen mused, letting his mind take him back. "That feeling of complete and utter helplessness, of having someone you love ripped away from you. It was maddening; I would never wish it upon anyone"

"You," 18 stopped to think over Krillen's words. "You loved me back then? Even though I had done nothing to deserve your affections?"

"I was head over heels by then!" Krillen looked at 18 and smiled, he really was the luckiest guy in the world.

"Head over heels?" 18 raised a curious eyebrow. "What have I told you about colloquialisms, Krillen? I don't get them"

"Alright then," Krillen laughed at 18s naivety "let me rephrase it for you. By that time, I was so completely in love with you that all the wishes, from all the dragons, in all the universe wouldn't have been able to do a single thing about it"

"I don't understand?" 18 asked, though she was indeed touched by Krillen's words. "How could you have possibly loved me, when you didn't even know me, and I was on a search and destroy mission for your best friend, no less."

"Haven't you ever heard of love at first sight?" Krillen asked playfully.

"No" 18 replied bluntly and in all seriousness.

Krillen suppressed the urge to laugh again, and instead explained the concept to 18 "it's when you just…" he stopped to think, "know."

"And when exactly did you know with me?" 18 asked, curious to hear Krillen's response.

Krillen blushed at 18's question and looked away from her, which only prompted her to quiz him even further. "Krillen," she said slyly, "I'm waiting"

"I knew that very first day" he replied quietly, still blushing profusely.

18 cast her mind back to her earliest memory of Krillen. "You mean that day on the highway?" she asked.

"That's the one"

18 was confused to say the least. She had beat Krillen's friends to within an inc of their lives that day, and had then proceeded to break Vegeta arm after their battle – a smug grin settled on her face as she relived that little victory. When she had kissed Krillen though, she had only been messing with him, not that she would ever tell him that now though! But she had never in her wildest imagination imagines that that small peck on the cheek would lead her to where she was today. She wondered where she would be now, if she hadn't acted on a whim that day, her life would probably be very very different.

"I still don't understand" 18 said, her brow furrowed in thought.

"Love doesn't have to make sense, 18" replied Krillen, "that's not the way it works"

They both sat there in quiet contemplation for several long minutes. 18 wondering exactly what she had done to deserve Krillen's undying love and affection, and Krillen questioning how he had ever managed to end up with someone as amazing as 18.

It was Krillen who spoke up first. "I blamed myself, you know. For you getting absorbed. No matter what anybody else did or said to me, I still felt like it was all my fault because I was to wear to protect you"

"But…" 18 trailed off, not knowing what to say. There was just no way that Krillen was responsible for the horrors that she was put through with Cell. Instead of saying anything though, she threaded her fingers through his and remained silent, encouraging him to be the one to talk.

"I wouldn't listen to anyone," Krillen continued. "No matter that they said, I still blamed myself. I thought I was never going to see you again. I thought that I had taken away your change at living a normal life, and I didn't know how I was going to live with myself. Some days I honestly felt like I wanted to die."

"Krillen!" 18 spoke up firmly, silencing him. "The things that happened to me inside of that monster where the most horrific things that you could ever imagine. The blackness that consumed me was worse than living through a million deaths. It hurt more than anything you could dream of. I wanted to badly to die, but I knew it was a death that was never going to come," 18 paused to collect herself. She had forced these memories to the back of her mind for so long, but her wounds were still as raw as they had ever been.

"But Krillen, it wasn't your fault, don't ever think that. Gero was a sick man; you know that as well as I do. The things that he did during his life are completely disgusting and unforgivable. Cell was designed to absorb my brother and I to achieve his perfect form, and nothing, not you, not Trunks and not even Goku was going to stop him from attaining that perfection"

Krillen sat quietly hanging off of 18's every word. She had never opened up to him like this before, but he was grateful that she trusted him enough to share her deepest thoughts with him.

"Do you want to know something?" 18 asked.

"Krillen nodded his head, not too sure what he was meant to say.

"While I was inside of that… thing, I sometimes had moments of rational thought and all I could think about was you, and how you saved me"

"But… but I didn't" Krillen stuttered

"Yes you did," 18 replied, "in more ways than one, too. When you smashed that remote with your foot, remember? Not only did you save me from a certain death right then and there, but you taught me a very valuable lesson about human kindness and compassion. That not everything was as black and white as I thought it was."

Again there was silence between the pair. The conversation has left them both worn, bringing up old memories that they had both spent years trying to suppress. Once again, it was Krillen who broke the silence.

"I looked after you, you know. Once Cell spat you out"

18 blinked, "really?" she asked. She had always been under the impression that they has only brought her along after the battle because they thought she would go straight back to her old ways.

"Yeah," Krillen smiled gently, "Goku had taken Cell away and we all thought it was all over. I was getting ready to take you back to Kami's with us when he came back. Vegeta and Piccolo thought I was crazy, but I wasn't going to leave your side until I knew you were safe and okay"

"I don't remember any of it, only waking up at the look out"

"It's probably a good thing you don't. It wasn't pretty. I think you we're in pain, you screamed a few times, but you were safe. I made sure of that"

"Thank you, Krillen"

"I was just so happy and relieve to see you. I swore to myself that very moment that I was going to protect you, what ever the cost, because you deserved to life a normal life. Well, that and the fact that I was, and still am, completely and utterly infatuated with you" Krillen finished, and 18 had to laugh when she noticed the rosy hue tainting his cheeks.

"If I had of known all of this earlier, perhaps I wouldn't have been so cold towards you on the tower"

Krillen laughed and rubbed the back of his head, "Don't sweat it babe! It's all good now. Besides, I can understand why you were so confused, I would have been too. I mean, we don't exactly lead the most normal of lives, do we?"

"I still can't believe you thought that 17 was my boyfriend!" 18 exclaimed and pretended to shudder, "do you have any idea how disgusting that is?"

"Well, hey" Krillen laughed, "I'm just as glad as you that he wasn't. I would have had to fight him to the death to win your heart"

"You would of won," 18 stated matter-of-factly. "17 might be my brother, but he is still an arrogant, stubborn jerk"

Krillen laughed and quickly glanced at the clock beside his bed. It was almost three thirty in the morning. Well and truly time for all the occupants of the small pink house to be sleeping.

"C'mon," he said through a yawn, as he lay down, "time for sleep."

Flicking the lamp off, 18 followed Krillen's lead and lay down, snuggling right up against the man whom she loved so very very much.

As Krillen lay in the dark, his arms around the woman he would die for, listening to the waves break against the shore, he smiled. It was time to put these horrible nightmares to rest. 18 loved him and wasn't going anywhere, and he knew it – and he was the luckiest guy in the world because of it.

fin.

A/N: Well there you have it. Short and sweet. I hope that you enjoyed this little piece of writing – I have spell checked, but I am a sleep deprived mother, so please be gentle when pointing out any errors…lol

Keep Safe

-Deadly Beauty