He loved her with all his heart, had since the day he met her years ago, even more so now. Tapping his chest as he walked, down the ramp it was his way of showing her she was in his heart and thoughts. Both her and the kids, they had two fantastic girls, his step daughter Sarah at 12 years old and their daughter, Katie at 4 years. None of his fans, understood, why he had turned his back on his third wife Michelle, after only three years of marriage and his baby daughter, to be with this woman. His closest friends knew, his family knew and he knew, that was all that mattered.
He also knew there was something wrong lately with Nikki. Sarah had been covering for her, saying she had been sleeping the last few times he called home. He found it odd as he called at different times of the day, each time had been the same answer. He had a feeling deep in his gut's, he prayed they weren't going down that road again. It had almost killed him not being able to help her, watch her almost kill herself, The powerlessness he felt was the worse feeling, he would never wish anyone to go through what he had. Yet he would never leave her, his heart, body and soul belonged to her, and he would do anything in his power to keep her safe. Tonight after his match he was sitting the family down and finding out what the hell was wrong. He knew she had a problem, he didn't know how bad it was.
Nikki watched him walk out, her husband of three months, Katie's dad, she loved him so much. Smiling as he acknowledged his family with his sign, she sat back and watched him do his job, hoping he still loved her when he found out what she had been doing. She had managed to hide it well, but knew her problem was getting worse again, eventually Mark would find out, and when he did all hell would break loose.
5 years earlier
"Michelle, I am not ready to get married, hell I've just got out of my marriage with Sara" god why did she have to do this, he didn't want to get married again, it hurt letting Sara go, but he had to. She had found it hard to cope with him being on the road, and even though he hated it, he fully understood. They parted as good friends, and always would be, she was a fantastic woman and a brilliant mum to his two daughters, Chasey and Gracie.
Looking at Michelle, he wondered what he really saw in her, to be honest he had only gone out with her, to take his mind off his assistant Nikki. She had worked for him, for three years now, been there when Sara and him had decided to split. Sara loved her, he loved her but, in a totally different way, she was a good friend to them both in that dark time. Damn even his kids loved her, and of course her daughter Sarah.
"But Mark, we have been together almost nine months"
"So fucking what, get out Michelle I don't need, this shit"
"Why the hell I bother with you Mark I don't know" walking out she slammed the door, he was so bloody annoying his damn mood swings. Hearing the door open again, god didn't the stupid bitch get the message
"I SAID GET THE FUCK OUT"
"Ok, but then what do I tell Sara she wanted to know how you are holding up ?, saying that not good from the looks of it. So old timer, can I come in or not?" Looking up he smiled, Nikki could always cheer him up, why the hell didn't he just make his move on her, she was different from Sara and Michelle. She was small only 5ft, long dark hair, down her back, and wow a figure he could spend ages getting to know. Not skinny, like she was on a bloody diet, she had a little weight, god how he would love to grab her, and make her his.
"Sure darlin, tough day honey, so sorry to…" holding her hand up to stop him.
"Mark, I know the date, he would have been a year old today, Sara is coping just as well as you" Walking towards him, she pulled him into her arms, not many people knew Sara had suffered a miscarriage at 7 months pregnant, a little boy that Mark had always wanted, what they both had wanted. Today would have been his first birthday and neither adult was coping well, which was fully understandable.
Mark held her close, breathing in her smell, it always comforted him.
"Is she ok?"
"I'd say the pair of you are getting through it, she wanted to bring the girls to the show, and see you, but she wasn't too sure how flavour of the last months would take it" Mark half smiled, Nikki had never liked Michelle, neither did Sara. That should really tell him that Michelle wasn't right for him, but hell Nikki didn't want to know, she was the one person he did want. If she had shown any signs of interest in him, he would have her as his, a ring on her finger and his surname, no two ways about it. He had always had a soft spot for the single mum, from the minute she started working for him, in fact Sara use to tease him about it. Even going as far as saying if they ever split up, Nikki's arms would be the only place she would find him, as he sought comfort, happy if he did.
"Call her for me darlin, tell her to bring them"
"Mark Calaway, I am not your counsellor, or go between, you and Sara need each other especially today, so ring her you're damn self" Mark pulled her tighter to him, not wanting to let go of the warmth that surrounded her.
"For me darlin" usual that worked, just fine, a little begging never did anyone any harm, rubbing his back as if she was comforting her daughter. She placed a soft kiss on his head, moving away from him.
"Come on Mark, you need to call her, she would love to see you, in fact I would love to see her and the girls, why the hell you two every split up I will never know" because of the feelings I was getting for you, he thought to himself, as well as the distance that had been growing between himself and Sara for awhile. He had chosen to stay on the road, to be close to Nikki, she wasn't even aware he only took time off when she was on vacation. In fact the few times he had been home , before the split, Sara had asked him if he was having an affair with Nikki. If she had known, she would have been shocked, Nikki was kind hearted, and would never come between a family, no matter what she felt. Mark never knew how much she cared for him, seeing him upset, had her aching to take him in her arms, and make love to him, take away all his pain and love him.
Present day
"Mummy, daddy won, look he's doing our sign for us in the ring" Nikki smiled at Katie, looking up at Mark, she felt like she was there in body but not in mind, grabbing the coke bottle she drank it quick, thank god there was vodka in it. Her hands were shaking, she needed more, craved it, but hell they were in the middle of an arena. Yes they sold drinks out in the back, could she nip out, undetected. If she stuck her cap on, not many people would recognise her, or so she hoped, A lot of fans had been taking an interest in Mark's private life since he had walked out on Michelle, and their daughter. Damn, looking around, she noticed Sarah was telling Katie, about their dad. Now would be the time, looking up at the ring, Mark had his back to her about to do his pose, as he held Paul's urn up the lights dimmed as he got down on one knee, now would be the best time, she knew Punk would be out in a short while to spoil it, yes that would give her time.
"Sarah, mummy has to go to the toilet, mind Katie for me" not understanding why her mum would leave them with all these strangers, she just nodded, her mum was acting strange lately.
Running through the crowd, she hoped to get to the bar, and get back, without detection. Mark saw her run, leaving his girls, what the fuck, not able to break character to protect them, his eyes stayed focused on his daughters, almost missing his cue to talk. How the hell could she leave them?. What was so fucking important than the safety of their children?. Seeing her flying back, his stomach churned, fucking alcohol, he had hoped he was mistaken, catching his eyes, seeing the hurt and disgust in them, Nikki knew her game was up. Her addiction, had come before the safety of their children, before her husband, before everything. Putting the drink to her lips, she let the liquid flow through her veins, calming her soothing her. Yes this is what she needed her best friend the bottle, the one thing that would eventually rip all she loved and cared about away. Yet she couldn't let it go, finishing the drink, Mark's segment had finished, she couldn't remember when that had happened, as one of the back stage crew came to get them, guiding them back to Mark's locker room. Walking in with the girls, Nikki was surprised to see Sara, what was she doing here, hadn't they left her two hours ago, oh well, maybe it was a surprise, smiling at her friends she walked over to her
"Sara what you doing here I though…"
"I asked her to come, she's taking the girls back with her" hugging his daughters to him, it was good to feel them, safe and secure in his arms, god if anything had happened to them.
"Umm why?"
" She asks me why?, Sara can you take these two for something to eat sweetheart, canteens down the hall, oh girls have what you want daddy will see you in a bit" ushering the girls out, Mark locked the door, leaning his back against it, his arms folded, he looked at his wife. God all the signs were there how the hell had he missed them? He was scared shitless, this little one held his heart and he was frightened to death he was going to loose her.
"Why baby girl?."
"Why, what Mark?"
"Stop fucking with me Nikki, you left the girls in a fucking arena with strangers around them, just so you could get your fucking fix, I will ask the question again. Why baby girl? What has got my little one, so damn fucked up, she had to turn back to that poison?" moving from the door, he walked towards her, he didn't want to go down that road again, Last time he had come home early, to find Sarah crying next to her body, she had smashed through the shower glass door, so high on the booze, he honestly thought she was dead.
Please god he couldn't go through that again, he wanted her safe and happy, not this shell of his Nikki that stood before him.
"I'm sorry Mark, I'm so sorry" pulling her shaking body into his arms, he rubbed her back, yes she was always sorry. Dropping his head back he looked at the ceiling, could he do this, was he strong enough to let her go. He had the girls to protect, and he could do nothing for her, he knew this after last time. The begging he had done, on his knees as he cried, screaming at her to stop. The words she threw at him. He never did tell her, or ever would how bad she was, what venom came from her mouth. She had ripped him apart, he was damn sure it was down to the bone.
"Come on baby girl, why?"
"I dunno Mark, fuck I don't know" sobbing in his arms, he held her tight, praying this time they would both come out of this alive, without her he was lost. His fans, the public, saw a strong man, never showing any weakness. Inside he was scared, scared that he was going to lose the thing that he loved the most. She had taken that first drink, god knows how long ago, now they had to play the waiting game. Would today be the day she accept defeat and let go, or would it take her to the gates of hell, insanity, or death. He felt sick, where the hell did they go from here?.