THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS SELF HARM SUCH AS SUICIDE. IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE TO THIS TOPIC. DO NOT READ. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.

Chapter One:

Death Is Peaceful,Easy. Yours Was Not.

Chapter song: Fix You by Coldplay

BPOV

I parked my truck on the side of the road. I got out wiping tears from my face. My chest felt heavy like I had just been hit by a truck. The pain of everything had become to much to bare. To much to keep going on. My dad told me something after my mom left us, that will forever stay with me until the end.

"We have to go on. We can't just wait for her to come back." I said hugging my dad close as we snuggled on the couch. I wish I could take the hurt out of his eyes. I would do anything.

"I can't live with out her, Bella. I just can't." My dad continued to sob into my shirt. I missed her too. I would be the only one of my friends with out a mother.

"You're living now. You're breathing." I said crying with him.

"Oh, Bella." He said barley coked out. "There is a big difference to living than plainly existing."

I nodded and rocked him. Trying to figure out the meaning of his words.

Now the only person that meant something to me was gone. Gone far away. Away from me. Never to come back. I stared at the picture of him and broke down.

"Dad! Come back I need YOU! I'm so sorry!" I screamed into the air. No one was listening. I walked up the interstate letting my hands drag against the stone wall. I was sobbing uncontrollably. Shaking. I didn't want to just exist I wanted to live.

I looked over the stone wall and watched to cars go by. It just wasn't fair. My life wasn't what I wanted. I was supposed to have both parents. Loving me. Giving me advice. Not one being God knows where and the other dead. It wasn't fair.

I climbed up on the side and tried to stand. I wobbled a little and finally got my balance. I looked down and my stomach flipped. I was going to vomit.

"Hey!" A mans voice shouted. "Get down from there! You're going to fall!"

"Thats kinda the point." I laughed darkly slowly turning to face the stranger.

"You don't want to do that. I bet you've got lots of people that would miss you." The stranger said coming closer to me. I took time to study his face. He was gorgeous. At least that would be the last beautiful thing I would see.

"Ha. No one would miss me. My father is dead. I have no one." I sobbed turning around almost falling.

"Your not going to do it." He said leaning on on the wall. Oh God and that voice.

"Are you challenging me?" Was this guy trying to make me jump?

"Of course not." He replied slyly.

"Cause I'll do it.." My voice trailing off as I looked down at all the moving cars. All the cars and the height.

"No you wont." He said coming closer.

"Stay back." I warned. "I'll do it."

"No you wont. You would have already jumped by now." He said looking down at the cars rushing by and let out a low whistle. "And that is a long way down. Looks like it would hurt, doesn't it?"

"What makes you think I wouldn't do it, huh? For all you know I could be some crazy person." I said looking between him and my death.

"Because." He said taking a deep breath. "My sister jumped. Right in front of me. She wouldn't even listen she just jumped"

I felt so bad. "I'm so sorry." I cried for him. It made me feel like betraying him somehow.

"Don't say your sorry. You didn't even know her." He sounded almost mad.

"I'm-"

"What's your name?" He asked cutting me off.

"Bella. Bella Swan." I said looking at only him now. "Whats yours?"

"Edward. Edward Cullen." He grinned. "Why don't you just give me your hand and get down?" He reached for me. I backed away almost falling. "Whoa whoa. Okay we can talk for a few more minutes if you want."

"Just some stupid conversation isn't going to make me get down!" I screamed at him turning back to face my death. "Death is supposed to peaceful, easy. My father's death wasn't! He was shot in the knees. He stabbed just to bleed to death! All because of me! ME! I wish it were me instead of him! I don't deserve to live!" I cried so hard I couldn't breathe.

Edward did what I never expected. I expected him to run back to his car and drive away and leave me to my death. But no. He climbed up and stood on the wall. Walking toward me with an acrobat's grace. He pulled out his wallet with a picture.

"Look at her!" He thrust the picture into my face. I looked at the picture it was a little girl with green eyes just like his. Full red lips. Copper hair.

"Is that your-"

"My daughter. My daughter is going to live with out two fucking parents if you don't get off this damn wall NOW!" He screamed at me. We looked into each others eyes for a long time. I looked back down and thought about everything. "You jump. I jump." He said reaching out his hand.

"You're crazy." I gasped. How would someone with so much to loose. Risk it for me?

"Please get down. If you jump you kill two people. You take two lives that somewhere in the world they will be missed. Can you live with that?" He asked coming closer to me. "Cause if you can live with that I sure as hell can. But you just don't strike me as the selfish type."

"I ...I..." I couldn't make up my mind. I wanted to take it all away. But I couldn't let a little girl live with out her parents.

"I'm prepared to jump, Bella. Are you really ready to?" He once again extended his hand.

I thought about pushing him off and jumping off. But I just couldn't. I took his hand and as soon as our hands touched a spark of electricity went through my body. He squatted down the same time as I did. He made sure I was on the ground before he got off.

I feel to my knees and gasped for air. "I can't breathe." I gasped.

"Your having a panic attack. What I want you to breathe in your noes and out you mouth." I did what he told me to and after some minutes I felt better. I stood and he pulled me to him calming me. I inhaled his sent. He smelled so good.

"Why do you care about me so much?" I asked getting closer to him. I was noes to noes with him now.

"Because, you're different than anyone." He said brushing his lips over my noes.

"How am I different?" I asked not believing. How was I any different from anyone else?

"I could see in your eyes that you didn't want to jump. You just needed someone to save you." Edward said kissing my forehead. "I wanted to save you the way I could never save my sister from herself. Every one needs saving every once in a while." His words made since. I did need saving. I was just waiting on the right person. "I really want to get to know you better and help you."

"How can you help me? I'm not fixable. The things I've saw.." I trailer off trying hard to find the right word. "There are no words. I'm just not fixable."

"Let me try to." He said cupping my cheek. My face growing warm.

I looked at him and for some reason I suddenly didn't feel so helpless. I felt hope. I took a deep breath and finally said "Okay."

A/N: So what do you think? Review and let me know what you think about it. Thanks to my beta for correcting my stupid English mistakes.