The Beginning of the Diary

My life. Something that sometimes made me feel like I was living in a TV soap opera.

My school life, simple. I stayed out of peoples way, they statyed out of mine.

My social life, non-existant. With no friends how was one to go about having a social life?

My home life, more complecated then I cared to admit. It was my home life that my school and social lives were the way they were. I mean how would people react if they found out what went on in my home? Would they be discusted with me? Would they pity me? I didn't want pity or discust, I just wanted to escape.

My life didn't use to always be this way though, when I was younger I had heaps of friends, I had a social life and my home life was fairly simple. My mother, being the loving and caring thing that she is would send me off to the snow every winter and in the summer she would send me to my dad's. I loved it. It was simple and I got to see my sister and dad, the only people I truly concidered family. However by the time I was 10 my mother was starting to go broke. She needed a husband, and arich one at that. So of course she married the first rich thing she happened upon. This lovely specimen of a man is the owner of Shinaroto Industries and had a notorius demon with a reputation for having to much of a liking for both women and alcohol. So marrying my mother was the perfect way to get the cops off his back about the women he had assulted.

Yeah, this seemed fine at the time. My mother got a new toy she could play with and we weren't broke anymore. However I quickly changed my opinion. Soon after they were married and he had moved in he began to get paranoid about my dad. I stopped getting calls and wasn't allowed any form of communication with him. My summer visits were cancelled and I was sent to a completely different country during the winter.

My life slowly deteriated over the years. My step-brother that had moved in with us ran away when I was 14 to go live with his mother. The only good thing that was in my life left me all alone, but I didn't blame him, he had needed to escape as much as I did now. He told me to follow him and believe me I tried. The only thing I succeded in doing though was ending up in hospital when my step-dad caught up with me.

It was a couple months later that the beatings started. At first it was just a slap here and there and maybe a kick thrown it as well, but it got worse and worse as I got older.

I managed to get this note book a couple days ago. I decided that it was going to be my diary. The only thing I would trust until I got out of this hell hole.

Right now though I can hear dad somewhere in this mansion (probably to drunk to relise his room is on the other side of the house) so until next time.

******

'God school id boring... I've already learnt all this crap...' I thought as I listened to the teacher go on about something to do with triganometry. With my zero social life I had a lot of time on my hands and usually used it to study... I know I sound like the biggest nerd but what else am I suppose to do?

I made it through the rest of my classes (just) and slowly made my way home. My step-dad was suppose to get back home today from his business trip to Fukuoka, so unfortunatly for me that meant he would be in an angry mood from all the business men, and the fact that he didn't have to pleasure of getting wasted every night. But on the positive side he wouldn't be drunk when he got home so the beating won't be as bad!... I know it's not much of a positive but in my life I did try to stay as optimistic as possible despite the situation.

Sometimes I wonder why I don't just run away but then I remember the threats he's made. I remember the last time I tried to run away. I thought I was actually going to make it to my dad's but he caught me at the airport. The brought me home and told me that if I ever tried to run away again or if I told anyone what he was doing my mother would get it.

Theres no lost love between me and my mother. I couldn't stand the women but that didn't mean that she deserved to die. That would just be selfish of me, and I didn't like being selfish.

I arrived home and quickly made my way into the kitchen to grab something to eat and then escape up to my room. But today didn't seem to be my lucky day however. My mother was in there playing around with one of her "extra" toys. I quietly made my way past them hoping to escape attention but my mother was able to pull herself away from her man of the minute to see me.

"Oh Rinny dear, I didn't see you there. You know you really should wear more make-up, it makes people notice you more." This was the usual type of conversation I had with my mother, or her telling me I wasn't good enough and I should just move out already.

"Thanks mum I'll keep that in mind next time I want to go whoring around like you." I said with a fake smile and made my way out of the kitchen before she could react.

I decided to go out the front to check the mail. I knew there wouldn't be anything in there for me but it was better then doing homework.

I made my way to the letter box, over the grass infront of my house. My house was huge, a mansion. But theres no way anyone would call it beautiful. The way I would describe it would be dead. It looked haunted, the massive front windows gave off a forboding look and it was painted some dark colour that added to the theme. I hated it. The only trees there were dead or dying, there was no gardens with colourful flowers or anything. It was depressing.

I pulled out the mail and looked at who it was addressed to. Step-dad, step-dad, mum, step-dad...and the strange thig was, there was something for me. I turned it over looking for the senders name but didn't find anything.

With shaking fingers I opended it up. A photo fell out and I bent over to pick it up, tears came to my eyes when I saw it. It was of my me, my dad and my sister Kagome when I was 10. Kagome would have been almost 11. I quickly pulled out the letter and started to read.

Dear Rin,

I hope you're able to actually get this letter. I haven't heard anything from you in almost 7 years, and call us worry warts but me and dad are slightly concerned. We understand that you might not want to see us and we don't want to force anything from you so we won't put any pressure on you, but please just tell us if you're ok.

If you want you can come visit, we use to have such a great time all those years ago when we were younger. I know we've both grown up and you probably don't want to run around the backyard playing tag, but we can do other stuff! I heard your mum got married a couple years ago to the owner of Shinaroto Industries, congrads to her and I hope you're happy with your family. His son Kouga goes to my school here actually so if you come visit you would be able to catch up with him to!

Hope to hear from you soon, but remember no pressure1

Lots of love, Kags.

The tears were running down my face now as I sat down on my bed. There was a second letter behind Kagome's and I pulled it out and started reading.

Dear Rin,

How are you? I hope you are doing well with your family. Me and Kagome are doing ok, I don't know if she told you or not but I got married a couple years ago. I don't know if you received any of my previous letters so I thought I should mention it. Her name is Kamako and she had a son that's the same age as you and Kagome called Miroku. He and his friends are quite the trouble makers so things are never dull. Two of his colosest friends are actually my business partners sons. I'm sure you've read about mine and Inutashio's business so I won't bore you with those details.

Everyone here would love it if you would come visit us soon. I don't want to force you and I understand if you have moved on with your new family but it would be good to see my little girl. I miss you quite a bit and I know Kagome does to. Kamako would love to meet you and Miroku would love to meet his little sister. Maybe you could come during school break? Or sometime in the summer like you use to?

Remember no pressure, miss you love Dad.

There was another note behind that but I was having trouble seeing through all my tears.

Dear Rin,

My name is Kamako, I guess I'm your step-mum. I don't really do well with letters but I would just like to say that I would very much like to meet you and I know your father would like to catch up. I understand that you may not like me cause I married your father but I would still like to get to know you.

Hoping to meet you, Kamako.

I laid back on my bed, tears falling uncontrolably down my face.

'Does he think I don't want to see him? I want to more then anything in the world... I have to think up a plan to get out of this place...'

Hi to all my readers! This is my first fan fic so please R & R!! I'll be uploading the next chapter soon!