Behold; my first Azumanga fanfic! I'm not a very good writer, and I don't know what inspired me to right this, but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless! Oh, and I don't own Azumanga... But you already knew that, huh?
What...?
"Hey! Chiyo-Chan!"
The pigtailed prodigy, Chiyo turned around at the voice of a familiar friend.
"Oh, Miss Osaka!" She smiled at the Osakan transfer student Ayumu, otherly known as 'Osaka'. "What are you doing?"
"There's somethin' I wanna discuss." Osaka answered with her usual smile.
"What's that?"
"What's it mean... when ya life's flashin'?"
Chiyo's head tilted as she waited for Osaka to say something else, as if to say she had just said something wrong. Osaka, however, was serious, her smile now replaced with a unusual frown.
"...Well..."
"Yeah?"
"It's something that happens just before a person dies." Chiyo explained. "Supposedly, before they die, memories of everything they did in the past come back to them."
"Oh..." Osaka thought about it for a moment. "Like before I get on an elevator?"
"What...?"
"No, wait!" Osaka cried. "...An escalator..."
-
"Miss Sakaki!"
The long-haired beauty Sakaki thought she'd heard a voice call her name, but payed it no mind. At the moment, she was too busy thinking of ways to pet Kamineko, a cat who would always bite her. Once again, her name was called, and she finally snapped out of her thoughts and seen Osaka standing next to her.
"...Yes?" she finally spoke up.
"I wanna ask ya somethin'." Osaka replied.
"...Yes?"
"Why do ya have such a nice chest?"
"W-what?" Sakaki's face grew red. "M-my chest?"
"Yeah! Why are ya American?" Osaka nodded.
"W-well..."
"Uh huh?"
"I guess..." Sakaki began, carefully thinking about her words. "...it's because I'm tall..."
"Oh... Tall?" Osaka thought about this, imagining what she'd be like if she were tall. "...So if I had ya height... I'd have ya chest?"
Sakaki nodded, still blushing. Osaka looked at Sakaki's chest, and then at her own.
"...Naw... I don't think it'd work that way..."
Sakaki's head tilted, wondering what was going on in her friend's head.
-
"Hey Yomi! Yomi!"
The girl-with-glasses, Koyomi, or 'Yomi', looked up from her textbook and faced Osaka.
"Yeah?"
"Can ya help me with a grain of truth?" Osaka asked.
"What...?" Yomi eyes widened slightly. "...S-sure. What do you want to know?"
"How long have snails existed?"
"What?" Yomi looked at her classmate in confusion for a moment. She then remembered all of the random conversations Osaka had started since their first-year of high school. She sighed as the looked back down at her textbook. "Well, no human is entirely sure. It just depends on what your opinion is..."
"My opinion?" Osaka asked. Yomi nodded before she started reading her book again. Osaka thought about this for a moment, before speaking again. "...So it's like ya determinin' which diet works the best?"
Yomi's face grew red as she glared at Osaka from the corners of her eyes.
"...I don't think that's quite the issue here..."
-
"Tomo!"
The Wildcat-Highschool-Girl, Tomo, stopped eating her fried-noodle sub and looked at Osaka.
"Hm?"
"Can I ask ya somethin'?"
Tomo nodded, since her mouth was full of food.
"What started the Chinese zodiac?"
Tomo swallowed her food, then placed her index finger on her chin. She searched her thoughts, trying to think of the answer to her friend's question...or a believable lie.
"...Uh... I think I heard somewhere that it started out as a system of numbers or something..."
"Oh..."
Tomo looked up at Osaka, and realized that she believed her. Then thinking Osaka wasn't going to say anything else, she began to take another bite of her food, but...
"So tell me what started it!"
Tomo looked up at her, now slightly annoyed. She swallowed her food again and sighed.
"...Why in the heck?"
-
"Hey! Kagura!"
The all-star sports girl, Kagura, looked at Osaka.
"Yeah? What do you want?" she asked, placing her hands on her hips.
"I have a question about swimmin'."
"And that is?"
"Why do dead bodies float?"
Kagura looked at Osaka or a moment, before a strange frown crossed her face.
"...I'm not sure why you're asking me... But I think it has to do with the fact that there's not much air in dead bodies..."
"Not a lot of air?" A smile crossed Osaka's face, before an idea popped in her head. "I see then! I can't breath in the water!"
"What...?"
"That'll be my next method! The next time we go swimmin' in P.E., I'll try that!"
"...Okay..."
-
Osaka looked around, noticing she was in her homeroom. The language teacher, Yukari Tanizaki, was at the front of the room, writing something something Osaka couldn't understand. She placed her hand on her head, which was hurting for some reason. She then took a better look at her teacher, and noticed she was angry about something. She sat still for a few moments, before...
"Miss Yukari?"
"What is it, Osaka?" Yukari asked, not turning around. The anger was clear in her voice.
"...Can ya tell me why my head's hurtin' so much?"
"...Do you really want to know?" the teacher questioned, pausing from her writing.
"Uh... Yes?"
Yukari then turned around and faced Osaka with an angry expression.
"...Because I hit you. You were sleeping in class again!"
"Oh... I was?" Osaka's head tilted slightly. "...All those questions must've gotten to my head, huh?"
Yukari looked at her, still angry, but now confused as well.
"What...?"
Well, that's that, I guess! Your comments and advice are greatly appreciated, so... Please review!