DISCLAIMER: The show CASTLE does not belong to me. It belongs to Beacon Pictures, ABC studios and the wonderful Andrew W. Marlowe.
Author's Note: So… Oh. My. God. Tonight's episode of CASTLE was amazing. Like really, really amazing! The Beckett jealousy! The Castle uncertainty! The "I don't steal things that already belong to someone else" line! It was fantastic! So freaking, fantastic! I hope that you will think this little drabble of mine will be equally as fantastic. I also hope that you'll leave a review!
I Belong To You
"So," Castle began as Kate bit into her hamburger. "Not to go over, what we've already gone over but uh… you still mad at me for doing what I thought was necessary to keep you out of trouble?"
Kate looked over her hamburger and waited until her mouth was clear of food. "Course Castle," she assured as she took a drink of pop. "After all it wasn't as though it meant anything…" Kate paused, hesitating over her next word. "Right?"
Castle nodded. "Right. I wanted to throttle you for thinking that I would…" now it was Castle's turn to pause because he wasn't sure how much he should tell Kate about the reasons as to why he kissed the insurance agent. "…do that willingly while under cover."
"Oh come on Castle," Kate scoffed. "You were not under cover."
"Yeah I was," he insisted. "Course I was. I was the bait while you searched the place. I was the lynch pin in the plan."
"Some lynch pin," Kate laughed. "The look on your face when we came out."
"Well yeah I thought that the whole deal was for you to get out without getting caught," he pointed out. "I was hoping that you'd just slip out but instead you stood there gaping with your mouth open like a fish or something…."
"I was not gaping,"
"Yeah," Castle argued with his mouth full of hamburger. "You were."
"So gross Castle," Kate said as she bit into her own hamburger.
Castle finished chewing and swallowing and laughed. "You love it, admit it."
Yeah and why haven't you admitted that you love me since the shooting? Kate asked silently in her head while another voice replied with And why haven't you told the guy that you not only heard him but you feel the same.
"You know," Castle continued. "I actually admire what she does."
"Really?" Kate asked, rather shocked.
"Yeah, she may a thief but she doesn't steal things that don't belong to her,"
"Oh really?"
Castle nodded. "Yeah told me so herself."
"In regards to what?"
"Me," Castle answered bluntly, causing Kate to nearly choke on her food.
"Excuse me?" Kate asked at the same time Castle asked, "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine," Kate assured. "But why would she say that she's not going and I quote "steal" you because you belong to someone else."
"Well because I do," Castle said simply, deciding that now the rabbit was out of the bag he was going to have to all the way down the rabbit hole again and tell Kate what he was feeling.
"And who you belong to Castle?" she asked with a raised eyebrow, trying to get back in control of the conversation. "Your mother? Alexis?"
"You," Castle answered, just as Kate went back down to take another bite of her hamburger. But the moment the word was out of his mouth, she dropped her food and just stared at him wide eyed. "I belong to you Kate," he continued placing his own hamburger down upon the plate. "I think I always have."
Kate couldn't help herself; she just glanced around the hamburger place, not believing that she was having this conversation with Castle now. Ever since she had woken up from being shot she had hoped that this conversation would come, but she wasn't ready yet. Yet as Castle reached across the table to take her hand, she realized with a start that she'd have to be ready— she had no choice.
Oh boy is my psychiatrist going to have a field day with this… she thought to herself as Castle took her hand. "Castle," she began in a shaky voice. "What are you saying?"
"I'm saying something that I've said before," he admitted. "But seeing how you don't remember I—"
"—I do," Kate interjected before she could help herself. "I do remember."
Castle recoiled his hands as though he had been burnt. "You… what?"
Kate bit her lower lip. "I said I remember. I remember what you said."
"Then why haven't you said something about it?" Castle hissed.
"Why haven't you?" Kate asked, fully realizing that what should have been a beautiful moment was degrading into more of their usual childish banter. "I was beginning to wonder if—"
"—if what?" he interjected. "If I felt the same? Course I feel the same. I just wasn't sure if I was ready to bring all this up again considering you're the one who said that you weren't in a place emotionally to have a relationship that you want."
"Are you deaf Castle?" she asked. "I was talking about you when I said that."
"Me?" he asked, rather taken aback. "How was I supposed to know that?"
"Well you seem to know everything else about me," she snapped. "I just figured that you got the subtext."
"I write subtext," Castle stated. "I don't often get it."
Kate shook her head and sunk back into her booth seat. "Obviously."
For a few precarious moments, neither of them spoke. But then Kate realized that she was mostly in the wrong because she lied to him so she made the first move. "I am sorry," she apologized quietly.
"For what?" Castle asked in a similar tone.
"For lying to you Castle," Kate replied. "You have given me two perfect opportunities to tell you that I remembered what you said, and I didn't take them."
"Why didn't you?"
"I was scared," Kate admitted. "I'm still scared."
"Scared of what?"
"Scared of what'll happen if I admitted what I heard. Scared of what might happen if we pursued something. Scared of watching you find someone else that was better suited for you leaving me—"
"That would never happen," Castle assured as he reached across the table and took Kate's hands again, their food totally forgotten. "I would never, ever—"
"Don't make promises that you can't keep Castle," Kate whispered.
"But I can keep this one," Castle promised. "I love you Kate," he continued emphatically. "I love you like I've never loved anyone before and that includes Alexis's mother. I'm not going anywhere."
Kate smiled and blinked back the tears that were starting to form. "You really mean that," she said somewhat in awe. "Don't you."
"Course I do," he assured. "Why don't you trust me?"
"I do trust you," Kate assured. "And I… I love you too but—"
"You love me?" Castle asked, ignoring the 'but' in that sentence.
Kate nodded, feeling like a schoolgirl admitting her first crush. "Yeah, but Castle…"
"I know," he interjected. "You can't start something with me until we solve your mother's murder."
Kate nodded again, feeling as though the wind had gone out of her sails. "Do you understand?"
"Course I do," he said with a nod. "I'd wait forever if I had to."
Kate smiled appreciatively. "I'm sure it won't take that long."
"No," Castle agreed as he decided to throw caution to the wind. "Especially when I tell you what I know."
"What do you know?" Kate asked, feeling as though she was about to hear something horrible. Castle moved around to sit beside her, re-took her hands and took a deep breath before delving into what he knew.
As Castle spoke, Kate couldn't help but feel betrayed. For months he had been keeping information from her. He had a lead; a credible lead and he hadn't shared. She was just about to go ballistic on him when he explained why.
"He can't keep you safe if you go after this," Castle explained. "I would have told you but—"
"You should have told me,"
"And watch you get killed?" he exclaimed. "I'm sorry Kate but I was not prepared and I'm still not prepared to do that."
"Well it's my life,"
"No," Castle snapped holding onto her hands just a little tighter. "It's not. You belong to me Kate… and I belong to you. We will catch the guy, I promise you that but we're going to do it together and we're going to do it smart. You just have to trust me on this one… okay?"
Kate felt all her anger disappear and she allowed herself to relax. "Okay Castle," she said quietly. "We'll do it your way."
Castle smiled and then before Kate could stop him, he leaned forward and kissed her. It was a kiss that was so unlike the first one they had shared while being undercover but it was entirely familiar as well. As they kissed, Kate realized that he was right. She belonged to him, and he belonged to her and she wasn't going to let him go.
END