Dear Readers:
I just could not stay away from you too long. This is a short story (6 chapters) that is complete. I hope you enjoy it. As usual, no beta-I own all my mistakes.
A Taste of Honey
Chapter One
It was a millisecond of contact when she placed her hand on my arm.
"Good-bye Commander," were her parting words as she exited. The formality of her words was like a knife in my side. Bending forward to see the corridor, my eyes followed her until she turned the corner.
It was almost as if I had been standing before a buffet table and ventured to consume only one head of grain. It was totally unreasonable for a hungry Terran and exceptionally illogical for me as a Vulcan/Human hybrid. With that biological heritage I was constantly forced to deal with Vulcan emotions that were engaged in a constant struggle due to my human control. That barraged control had long ago come up a loser in many of my struggles.
`0`0`0`0`0`
My bags were packed. My letter of resignation, to be effective upon my departure from Terra, was displayed on my com screen. I had left all but one of my uniforms hung neatly in the closet. for Star Fleet's eventual disposal,
Although it was illogical to hold on to the past, for ka'deth, (what is, is)I uncharacteristically put one of the uniforms on. It would be the only physical reminder of my prior life, that would accompany me to New Vulcan.
As I sat, poised to strike 'send' I stopped and decided to take a final walk through these familiar hallways and facilities.
`0`0`0`0`0`
In view of what was ahead, I found myself reviewing some of my life-shaping decisions-as a young boy, I elicited combat with Skonn. As a graduate, I chose Star Fleet Academy over Vulcan Science Academy. Although I had never physically touched her, I showed weakness when I allowed myself the luxury of imagining a personal relationship with my cadet student, Nyota Uhura. Another example was my loss of control that led to my having to relinquish the captaincy of the Enterprise. Although not an example of loss of control, the not completely thought out experience when myself and my captain's beamed down to the Narada and the involvement in the subsequent life and death battles aboard that ship although successful were not evidence of a Vulcan mindset because my motive was revenge. Then there was the flight of the jellyfish, that prevented the destruction of earth and that allowed me to destroy the Narada's drill, Next, with visions of Nyota in my mind, my calculated suicidal run toward that monster ship. Every single one of those experiences were based on the strongest of emotions coupled with control that did little to tame their expression. The final evidence of the nature of my decisions was when my captain was willing to assist that ship, the same one that was responsible for my mother's death, I was certainly not in agreement. As I contemplated these experiences, three was no shame or regret for any of them, just an admission of my conflicted, unique nature that I had nothing with which it could be compared, judged or tempered.
Before me now was this present life-altering decision. I determined that most of these previous decisions had brought me to the here and now and must be viewed as 'what is, is.
It had been quite a while ago when I had finally admitted that Nyota's presence filled me with an incredible sense of well-being. In my private room, my imaginings were visionary. My knowledge of Star Fleet Academy's ruling against fraternization, forced me to interpret them to the extreme degree, which silenced my tongue and restrained my hand. I gave her no indication of my private thoughts, my imaginings and thus had no idea of any thoughts she had of me, or about me.
For almost four years, I was in torment, fueled by the sight of her every day, when she was in my presence I watched her movements, heard her voice, her laughter, the sound of her breathing. All these eventual affected me mentally and physically. And indeed I did bask in her brilliance…and then the emergency call from Vulcan.
Then the loss so great that it came to be called 'The Immeasurable…," all compounded to force a sense of duty in me. I had the ability and contacts that would enable me to help my people.
It was while on my self-imposed tour that I encountered a mystery Vulcan, whose identity eventually became known to me. He instructed me to 'Do what you feel is right."
My thoughts were, 'Feel, feel, that was contrary to every Vulcan discipline that I had trained in, to every Vulcan truth. We, as a people, personified logic, decisions based on deep thought. It was this quality that had been missing in so many of my previous decisions.'
My conclusion was the logical, Vulcan one. There was no hesitation when I finally pressed the 'send' button. Another chapter of my life was then closed.' The only area of regret was simply the idea that I probably would never see Nyota Uhura again.
`0`0`0`0`0`0`0`
Work on New Vulcan was unrelenting. I felt valued, and was driven. Very little of my time was spent in recollection, but any thoughts of my past life always included Nyota. I thought it logical to completely shut off any information from The Academy. Finally after five years, of imposed isolation, I pulled myself away to return to earth. My visions of Nyota had never ceased, it had indeed continued to be my 'taste of honey'. My first stop after arrival was the Administration Building and I checked the faculty roster,
Nyota McCoy nee Uhura,
Department Head
Xenolinquistic
Instructor
Building Six
Room 307
I shook my head and blinked my eyes in a totally irrational way as if by my cutting off the sight of those letters they would in some way rearrange themselves. For a few seconds I did not move or breathe. Then I directed my steps to the third floor.
I walked slowly to that location, and attempted to determine if I should make myself known. As I approached her classroom I heard her voice and again, there was that pang in my heart. Her back was towards me as I peered into the room and when she turned and faced her students I could see that she carried life. She was even more beautiful than my dreams remembered and for some unknown reason her head went up, and our eyes met. She excused herself from her students, and so like me, gave them a reading assignment to finish during her absence.
Old habits die hard,
"Hello Commander, excuse me…Spock, welcome."
Looking up at his unchanged visage she said,
"These past five years have been kind to you."
I attempted to formulate my words, but the bell rang and she told me,
"Don't move, we have a bit of catching up to do."
Her class was dismissed and she returned and said,
"I'm eating for more than one and I am famished. Could you accompany me to lunch?"
My nod was in the affirmative.
She almost threaded her arm through mine and gave it a second thought and said,
"I am sorry, I almost forgot."
"There is no offense taken."
"How are things back on New Vulcan?"
"The work is progressing ahead of schedule."
She commented,
"I am sure that your talents have added to that success."
"I recall a Teran saying, 'Many hands make light work'.
She smiled and nodded.
We made our way out of the West Gate and proceeded to an Indian restaurant that I remembered. She explained,
"You remember, all vegetables, it is safe."
I nodded and assisted her to seat herself and I noticed the absence of a wedding ring. Perhaps there has been swelling due to the pregnancy.
I then steeled myself to make the all important inquiry,
"How is Dr. McCoy?"
Her face took on a completely different appearance. Not meeting my eyes she said,
"Leonard was declared MIA, presumed dead, four years ago…The marriage was annulled after three years and now I am legally single. He had stored his sperm and five months ago I decided to become the mother of his child. It would be what he would have wanted. The child is a male."
She turned and asked,
"What about some personal information about you, like a significant other?"
With the same impassive look, I simply said,
"There is none in both areas of inquiry."
"That is hard to believe, Commander…I mean, Mr. Spock."
"Please, too much time has passed between us to be formal…Nyota."
She nodded,
"Over nine years."
As she talked, I stored new memories of her.
We ordered and as we ate, I was silent, she was talkative. Nyota revealed all the advancement that her department had implemented. All of them quite brilliant, most had their basis in points of discussion between she and I in my classroom or exercises in concentration that we had enjoyed together.
As I sat gazing at her my entire mindset changed. I knew I could not go back to New Vulcan, to that other life. I knew there was nothing on New Vulcan that had the pull that was right before me. I helped her to rise and secure her balance and as we exited, I hesitatingly placed my hand on the small of her back and she looked up at me and smiled.