Author's Note: Inspired by Doug Walker's analysis of Mai in his review of "The Boiling Rock Part II," which includes the awesome line about her previously having "no boundaries to test." The last two lines are from the Taylor Swift song that should be Mai's and Asami Sato's theme song.
"I never expected this from you..."
Of course she didn't. Mai never struck anyone as the rebellious type. What no one knew, however, was that it wasn't her choice. She never broke rules, disobeyed orders, stepped out of line, spoke out of turn, crossed lines or tested boundaries – not because she didn't care or thought it was morally wrong, but because she simply never had any boundaries to test.
All her life, she had been robbed of the joy of rebellion.
She was the spoiled first born of a wealthy family. They begrudged her nothing. Anything she wanted, she could have. Misbehavior didn't result in deprivation of privileges; it only meant more annoying interviews and interrogations and lectures and lessons from her dismissive, careless parents. Good behavior meant she got to be left alone; that was what she preferred. So she behaved and reaped the rewards. Rebelling would have resulted in nothing but more boredom.
There was a time when a girl who liked throwing knives would have been rebellious. Not so anymore. Her culture was more advanced and more civilized than the barbarian tribes' and kingdoms' they were struggling to liberate. Women had long since been afforded rights and freedoms that women in the other nations couldn't even dream of – they married whom they chose (more or less, as much as men could, at any rate), fought on the front lines, owned property, managed their own affairs, and there was absolutely no stigma against them using weapons; girls learned how to fight in school just like the boys did. She was proud of how well she'd mastered her weapons, but there was nothing defiant or unladylike about it – not in this day and age. It was a perfectly acceptable skill. People could only be impressed, not scandalized.
Most girls were guaranteed the opportunity to rebel against their intended husband. She was engaged to the boy she loved with all her heart. Her parents watched her budding friendship with the prince with nothing but complete approval; her choice couldn't have pleased them more. She swore her mother was gloating when she told her of the arrangements, as if she knew she had dodged every parents' worst nightmare and was confident that Mai was powerless to threaten her plans in any way... not because she was unable to, but because she wouldn't want to. She had nothing to gain by objecting and could only submit to their choice for her gracefully enough so that they would leave her alone, as always. Any resistance would have been irrational.
She was raised during a war. She didn't care about the politics of it enough to fight passionately for either side. She was completely indifferent to living in a new colony in enemy territory. She felt no patriotic loyalty for her people and their cause, nor compassion for the enemy. She had no interest in getting involved in the conflict around her. She simply defended herself and her family from any attacks by the enemy. She accepted the princess' invitation to a mission because, first of all, she didn't care what the mission was for, only that it would mean something new and hopefully interesting, and second of all, she knew it wasn't a request. Rebellion was not the proper course of action around Azula; being careful was.
"The thing I don't understand is why – why would you do it?"
Because now was the first opportunity she ever had to rebel. She'd been waiting for it all her life. She'd been expecting it ever since leaving New Ozai. She'd been carefully preparing for it ever since returning to the Fire Nation. She'd feared Zuko had stolen her chance when he left without her. Fortunately, she'd not only chosen a man who proved to be the biggest rebel she'd ever seen but who needed her help to do so, whether he wanted her involved or not. She enjoyed every minute of her defiant fight there on the platform of the Boiling Rock. No matter how long or short her life would be, it hadn't been worth living until she'd fought that battle. No matter what the consequences, she didn't regret it. No matter what the princess did to her, it was worth it; to seal her victory in their long-running, silent contest for Zuko, she made sure Azula knew that:
"I love Zuko more than I fear you." Fighting for him is worth whatever you do to me. You failed to conquer me, and nothing you do now can change that.
She'd won the greatest victory of her life (so far) that day. She received the prize a few weeks later, after helping him realize she'd still accept it.
"So does this mean you don't hate me anymore?"
How could I hate you? she thought. You gave me the chance I'd been longing for. You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter! You are the best thing that's ever been mine!