I've always been the loser. Always after Near, always second, always runner up.

Now, I know what you're thinking. Second place isn't exactly doesn't exactly mean you've lost. I bet you all think I'm being a crybaby or something. Well, dear reader, picture this. All your life, you've only wanted one thing. To succeed. To be the best. To win. Now, picture someone else comes along, years younger than you, and ruins everything. That damn Near.

Second place is losing, dammit! It's just a way of saying "You didn't win but you were close! Here have a freaking medal!" It's infuriating! To always come so close but still lose.

Look, I know that we all lose stuff sometimes but it isn't exactly board games and checkers I'm losing. It's my dreams, my hopes, the person I want to be. I want to be the best but how can I when that damn Near is always there, one step ahead?

I don't expect you guys to understand. I mean, it's not like you get my situation or the sort of crap that I've been through. Maybe I am just complaining. This stuff is important where I'm from. We need to be the best or...we're just another loser. I've always been second so nobody here gives me a second thought. It's always "Near, you're so great at everything!" "Near, god bless you and your all round perfection!" "Near, I wanna have your damn babies!" Why can't everyone see what a self absorbed loser that freaking sheep is.

They say I'm a loser because I'm too "emotional" What a load of bull! I mean, that sounds like I start crying when I'm asked to do a math equation! Which I don't. I am not emotional! Somethings just piss me off! But Nears the opposite. No matter what, he's always so damn cold and logical. He's like a robot and he gets praised for it! I have no idea why everyone has such high hopes for a guy like that! He's not a big deal!

God, I sound like a whiny little girl. It's just that guy annoys the hell out of me. I guess being second isn't that bad. It's better than being third. Matt doesn't seem bothered by it though. There's no pressure on him to succeed. Sometimes, I think he's third just because he wants to be. Like, he can't be bothered trying to be first so he just settles down somewhere where he can relax. Honestly, it wouldn't surprise me. He's a great guy but...well he doesn't have any ambitions what so ever. We had to write down what our hopes and dreams were for the future once. I put, to be first. Near put, to be as great as L. Damn sheep. And Matt...Matt wrote, to play games and eat Chinese food for the rest of my life. And to have hot babes. (I'm not even kidding. It's exactly what he wrote.)

Anyway, he is really smart. Smarter than he lets on. He finishes tests before any of us but always leaves stupid mistakes. But I know he does it on purpose because he knows all the stuff anyway! Look, don't tell anyone I said this but sometimes, Matt helps me with stuff I don't understand. He's smarter than me so I don't get why he plays dumb. Probably doesn't want the hassle. I don't blame him.

So, that was my stupid rant. Sorry for bothering you with this thing but sometimes I need a way to...channel my aggression. If I don't, I'll probably end up punching Near in the face. With a chair.

Okay, I'm going to go. Stuff to do, people to see, blah, blah, blah.

See ya.

Mello.

A/N: Hey guys! Thought I'd do something with Mello today! He's awesome. I'm thinking of doing a regular thing like this. What do you think? It'll be something like the death note characters write down there biggest problems or something that they hate. With Mello, it's losing. So, tell me if you want more! Bye!