Chapter One:

Iraq, 2011

I woke up drenched in sweat with no idea where I was. My leg was throbbing, but my limbs were too heavy to move. Looking around, I realized I was in a hospital on base. Why the fuck am I in a hospital and what the hell is going on with my memory? If I'm hospitalized, then what happened to Petra, Günther, Auruo, and Erd? Or that little shit Eren? Fuck. Someone better come and tell me what's going on soon or I'll really flip my shit. Hold on a sec, are those footsteps? Finally, maybe I can get some answers. I saw a white coat and yelled, "Hey! What's up Doc?"

The person looked up in a bit of a startled manner, and said, "Well, guess the shorty has finally woken up."

Now that ticked me off. This guy doesn't even fucking know me and is calling me a shorty?! I mean, yeah, I'm only 160 cm but what gives him the right to comment on my height? He probably isn't that tall. Oh shit, he's taller than he looked from far away. And… he has boobs? So, she then. Wait, why is she getting so close? This bitch ain't gonna try and sit on bed bed oh fuck well I guess she is. Dammit, does personal space mean anything to anyone nowadays? Oh, she's gonna say something. Better be important.

"Well Lance Corporal Levi, my name is Dr. Hanji Zoe, and you'll be under my care during your stay here. You've been treated for severe burns on your left leg and a routine amputation below the knee. I mean, those terrorists did throw a grenade directly under your feet, so it's a miracle you have your right leg-"

"HOLD THE FUCK ON. Are you telling me that my leg is gone?"

"Well, below the knee, yes."

"What about my squad? Are they being treated as well? Where are they?"

She fell silent at this. She had been giving me this curiously penetrating glance the whole time she was talking, but now that gaze was directed toward the sheet covering my legs. "I regret to say that you and your ward were the only ones to survive. You and your squad were sent as bodyguards to protect one Eren Jaeger through hostile enemy territory. Your transport was besieged by a large group of the local terrorists. They were unexpectedly armed to the teeth. Your squad fought to the death and you saved Jaeger. That is all I know about your situation, however I believe Commander Smith should be here shortly to brief you better about your situation. I'm so sorry to be the one to break the news."

All I could do was rest my head in my hands. That was too much information to process. They can't all be dead, they were top soldiers. They were my comrades, my friends.

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. How could I let this happen? I was supposed to be the one in charge, the prepared one. I can't… I need to be alone.

"Leave. Please."

"I'm afraid for my patients mental welfare if I leave."

"TOO FUCKING BAD! I need to be the fuck alone right now. My squad is dead on my watch and you tell me just about as apathetically as if you were describing the goddam weather and I'm supposed to be okay? I'm supposed to want to be around people? If you're really that damn worried, then leave me be or get me some sleeping pills, because those are the only ways I'll get over this quickly."

"If you absolutely insist, I'll leave, but Commander Smith is literally walking in as we speak."

Bitch was right. He was literally only a couple of meters away from my bed. Fuck, why is it that today of all days everybody wants to talk to me?

"Good afternoon, Lance Corporal Levi. Did you sleep well?"

"Enough with the bullshit, Irwin. What the hell happened to my squad?"

Doc seemed visibly startled at me addressing him without his title, but I was beyond caring at that point.

"Excuse me, Dr. Zoe, would you mind leaving us alone for a moment?"

She nodded and left.

"Well then Levi, someone seems a bit snappy."

"How the hell would you feel after waking up and being told you lost your left leg and your whole squad?"

"Probably similar to you, but I would expect one of our best soldiers with over 10 years of experience on the battlefield to act a bit more mature in this situation."

"Blame it on the meds if you have to Irwin, I give no fucks. What happened out there?"

He thought for a moment, sighed, and finally started to say something that mattered.

"As I'm sure Dr. Zoe said, you and your squad had a mission to deliver Eren Jaeger to another base across the desert. You and your squad made it about a quarter of the way there when you were attacked by a local terrorist group. Petra radioed in your location as soon as the attack started, which is why we managed to find you and Jaeger and bring you back. The terrorists were armed to the teeth. AK47s, grenades, Kevlar, you name it, they probably had it. Your squad fought as hard as possible against them, and sadly died in the process. Petra was hit with a grenade square in the chest. Günther and Erd were both dead due to blood loss and Auruo committed a suicide charge. The Jaeger kid actually did something unexpected and took out a bunch of the terrorists on his own before you grabbed him and stole the terrorists' Humvee. I don't even know how you managed to drive even part of the way here in your condition. Your calf was hanging on by a couple of tendons and you were passed out in the driver's seat when we found you. Your squad died bravely in the line of duty, and you managed to save a very important person. You should feel proud, Levi, if anything else. Stop blaming yourself for something that was completely out of your control."

With that, Irwin got up and left. Doc walked back in with a weird look on her face.

"Sooo…"

"You heard everything, didn't you?"

"Well, let's just say that I have big ears."

"Hmph."

"I hope you don't keep up that attitude for six months."

"What the fuck are you talking about Doc?"

"On average, it takes about nine months for a person to rehabilitate themselves with an amputated leg. I'm betting it'll be closer to six for you."

"Why does my rehab concern you?"

"I'm your doctor for the entire time it takes for you to be a functional member of society again. However long that might take."

"Doc, don't you have any other patients to bother?"

"No. I volunteered pro-bono to take your case because I admired your balls. Driving 40 miles with a dead leg is pretty damn impressive. Simply put, I want to see what makes you tick, experiment, if you will. And lucky me, the military likes me enough to make me legally responsible for you until, in my expert opinion, you are ready to reintegrate with society."

"Shit. I'm just surrounded by psychos aren't I?"

"I'm not psycho, just an intellectual. By the way, you can stop calling me doc. Hanji is fine with me."

"Don't trust you enough. Doc is good enough for me."

"You might reconsider a few weeks from now. Oh, and I hope that you like planes. We're flying to my flat in London in a week. And if you're worried about air pressure opening your wounds, don't worry. I'm a doctor after all."

After flashing a manic smile, Doc left the room humming under her breath.

Well, I guess I'm fucked.