Three Steps Away From Your Heart
Author: Ganki yep I'm back
Rating: PG for no probably PG-13 in later chapters, don't know yet.
Warnings: Obi Angst Woo-Who!
Summary: Obi-Wan can only hope for his masters' love and acceptance but has yet to earn it he believes. Now faced with choices he must lean to accept he will never be loved by his master, or will he? However if that ever happen will Obi-wan still love him?
Notes: Happy Reading! -
Prologue:
I have been sitting on the edge of the balcony for a few minutes, maybe even a few hours. Watching as the rain washes away the sins of the day. The city, no the planet, is ever moving. Not allowing it's movements to be stopped by the water that is falling. I enjoy feeling the steady rhythm of water fall on me; it gives me something to take my mind of everything. I don't have to think about anything except the rain.
Once again I allow myself to look into the living space that connects to this balcony. I'm waiting for him to come home but he won't. I have something everyone must have but losses after awhile, hope. I do have feelings despite what most people think of Jedi we are still human, or some type of species.
I don't know why I actually expect him to come home today, why should he? He has nothing important left here for him. Some would try to fight that statement. They would say he has me but I would laugh at that. Oh how I wish he actually thought of me as something important but no I'm only meant to stand three steps behind him, never next to him.
I glance at the time and I realize it had been hours since I had first come out here to enjoy the rain out here. I may get sick but would that matter? Would he realize me if I was sick maybe even find me a place in his heart, nope. I uncurl my legs from under me and slip of the balcony's edge making my way towards the living room. I make my way to my room while I slip out of my clothes, which have now left a path of water from where I came in, to where I now stand.
Once in dry clothes I start to walk towards my bed in the corner of the room across from the window. I allow myself to plop down onto the hard but in a weird way comfortable mattress. Glancing around my room my eyes fall upon the area where my awards that I had won around the temple in classes and small tournaments. It's a small amount, not all that many. However my friends would laugh at me if I said that. They think I have won everything and anything, the perfect padawan. It must not have been enough though to get him to notice me. I don't like it but the key thing is that I don't like the situation not him.
I don't think I could ever not like him even though that is another thing to get my friends to laugh. I have been making them laugh a lot, haven't I? I'll tell them that he saved me and if weren't for him I probably would have become a farmer instead of a Jedi. I will always be grateful for that but I'm selfish I want more. I just don't want to be forever grateful to him I want to be accepted and maybe if I'm lucky enough, loved.
I begin to fall asleep till I heard then an annoying ring, I decided to ignore it. By its second ring I realized what it was, the door. I hop out of bed running to the door I open it. Dying for it to be him, for him to be home and actually greet me with a hug, okay a little too big of a wish but for him to be home would be enough for me. However it wasn't him on the other side of the doorway it was one of my friends, Garen.
"Hey I thought you were coming with us to night, we missed you."
Damn! I was supposed to go out with my friends at one of the clubs that we like but I forgot, again. I told him sorry I forgot and anyways if he had come home while I was out I wouldn't have been happy. He wouldn't have cared if I was actually gone, he probably wouldn't even notice.
He sighed at my answer telling me that I shouldn't dwell on any of it. He was just some jerk and I was better then him and always would be. After six years of this he would have thought I would just learn to not care and live my own life. I agree because I always do, it usually shuts him up but tonight it doesn't work. He keeps going however his words have fallen upon deaf ears. I believe he finally realizes this and sighs once again.
He then smiles at me and I do the same we give each other a quick hug that best 'male' friends would give. You know those hugs where you hug and then try to beat the living day light out of the other persons back. I know what he says is true and it makes sense however like I said I will never dislike him but I will dislike the situation.
Again I have been forced to think which only gives me a headache one that won't allow me to get to sleep right away. So I poor some water and walk aimlessly around the living room finally finding a destination I again walk towards the couch. I don't remember ever actually getting to it but I know I did. I was asleep a second before I hit it.
The next mourning I wake up I have no class till the afternoon because I had only recently got back, recently meaning yesterday at around this time. I make my way toward the kitchen and see a dirty cup that was once filled with java juice occupying the sink. It then hits me he came home last night and I was asleep, go me. I reach out with the force anxious to feel his presence and I do but it's the presence of last night. He has left already but I do feel him he is in the temple.
He's home but probably not for long. My master is home, Qui-Gon is home.
Yep I am alive and I actually sat my lazy but down and began to right a new fic. Hope you guys like it and if you do show it by reviewing. You get a cookie if you do - Sorry again for my disappearance to many things happened in a year to even tell you but trust me I had a one damn good answer to my away time but I'm back hopefully to stay for awhile!
Oh yeah, any questions because it may be a lil' bit confusing but trust me it will evolve. There is a plot and all isn't Obi being all angsty but there will be a lot of angst. I just wanted to give you guys a look inside of his mind before we get this baby going.
ganki
Author: Ganki yep I'm back
Rating: PG for no probably PG-13 in later chapters, don't know yet.
Warnings: Obi Angst Woo-Who!
Summary: Obi-Wan can only hope for his masters' love and acceptance but has yet to earn it he believes. Now faced with choices he must lean to accept he will never be loved by his master, or will he? However if that ever happen will Obi-wan still love him?
Notes: Happy Reading! -
Prologue:
I have been sitting on the edge of the balcony for a few minutes, maybe even a few hours. Watching as the rain washes away the sins of the day. The city, no the planet, is ever moving. Not allowing it's movements to be stopped by the water that is falling. I enjoy feeling the steady rhythm of water fall on me; it gives me something to take my mind of everything. I don't have to think about anything except the rain.
Once again I allow myself to look into the living space that connects to this balcony. I'm waiting for him to come home but he won't. I have something everyone must have but losses after awhile, hope. I do have feelings despite what most people think of Jedi we are still human, or some type of species.
I don't know why I actually expect him to come home today, why should he? He has nothing important left here for him. Some would try to fight that statement. They would say he has me but I would laugh at that. Oh how I wish he actually thought of me as something important but no I'm only meant to stand three steps behind him, never next to him.
I glance at the time and I realize it had been hours since I had first come out here to enjoy the rain out here. I may get sick but would that matter? Would he realize me if I was sick maybe even find me a place in his heart, nope. I uncurl my legs from under me and slip of the balcony's edge making my way towards the living room. I make my way to my room while I slip out of my clothes, which have now left a path of water from where I came in, to where I now stand.
Once in dry clothes I start to walk towards my bed in the corner of the room across from the window. I allow myself to plop down onto the hard but in a weird way comfortable mattress. Glancing around my room my eyes fall upon the area where my awards that I had won around the temple in classes and small tournaments. It's a small amount, not all that many. However my friends would laugh at me if I said that. They think I have won everything and anything, the perfect padawan. It must not have been enough though to get him to notice me. I don't like it but the key thing is that I don't like the situation not him.
I don't think I could ever not like him even though that is another thing to get my friends to laugh. I have been making them laugh a lot, haven't I? I'll tell them that he saved me and if weren't for him I probably would have become a farmer instead of a Jedi. I will always be grateful for that but I'm selfish I want more. I just don't want to be forever grateful to him I want to be accepted and maybe if I'm lucky enough, loved.
I begin to fall asleep till I heard then an annoying ring, I decided to ignore it. By its second ring I realized what it was, the door. I hop out of bed running to the door I open it. Dying for it to be him, for him to be home and actually greet me with a hug, okay a little too big of a wish but for him to be home would be enough for me. However it wasn't him on the other side of the doorway it was one of my friends, Garen.
"Hey I thought you were coming with us to night, we missed you."
Damn! I was supposed to go out with my friends at one of the clubs that we like but I forgot, again. I told him sorry I forgot and anyways if he had come home while I was out I wouldn't have been happy. He wouldn't have cared if I was actually gone, he probably wouldn't even notice.
He sighed at my answer telling me that I shouldn't dwell on any of it. He was just some jerk and I was better then him and always would be. After six years of this he would have thought I would just learn to not care and live my own life. I agree because I always do, it usually shuts him up but tonight it doesn't work. He keeps going however his words have fallen upon deaf ears. I believe he finally realizes this and sighs once again.
He then smiles at me and I do the same we give each other a quick hug that best 'male' friends would give. You know those hugs where you hug and then try to beat the living day light out of the other persons back. I know what he says is true and it makes sense however like I said I will never dislike him but I will dislike the situation.
Again I have been forced to think which only gives me a headache one that won't allow me to get to sleep right away. So I poor some water and walk aimlessly around the living room finally finding a destination I again walk towards the couch. I don't remember ever actually getting to it but I know I did. I was asleep a second before I hit it.
The next mourning I wake up I have no class till the afternoon because I had only recently got back, recently meaning yesterday at around this time. I make my way toward the kitchen and see a dirty cup that was once filled with java juice occupying the sink. It then hits me he came home last night and I was asleep, go me. I reach out with the force anxious to feel his presence and I do but it's the presence of last night. He has left already but I do feel him he is in the temple.
He's home but probably not for long. My master is home, Qui-Gon is home.
Yep I am alive and I actually sat my lazy but down and began to right a new fic. Hope you guys like it and if you do show it by reviewing. You get a cookie if you do - Sorry again for my disappearance to many things happened in a year to even tell you but trust me I had a one damn good answer to my away time but I'm back hopefully to stay for awhile!
Oh yeah, any questions because it may be a lil' bit confusing but trust me it will evolve. There is a plot and all isn't Obi being all angsty but there will be a lot of angst. I just wanted to give you guys a look inside of his mind before we get this baby going.
ganki