The Game Is Over But the War Has Just Begun
Sequel to "Knight Protects Pawn"
Rated M for abstract discussion of pornography and wayward thoughts.
During her flight home, Lizzie reflects on the recent past with Darcy and considers whether or not they have a future.
Author's Note: The quote from Peter Pan belongs to author J.M. Barrie
"Ladies and gentlemen, please turn your attention to the front of the cabin while the flight attendant explains the emergency procedures …"
Lizzie could never get over how life could turn so quickly on a dime. One minute she is waxing poetic about the virtues of her new iPhone and before she can fully process it, she's on a flight homeward bound. The news of Lydia could not have occurred at a less opportune time. Over the last couple of weeks, Darcy had demonstrated he was not the man Lizzie had thought him to be, nor the man she had portrayed on her vlog. While her opinion of him started to shift when she first began shadowing his progressive company, the most profound change occurred while he and Gigi showed her the city. Darcy showed a very different side of himself; he was able to point out landmarks, locales, and examples of public art, and then discuss the significance of each at length. He did not do this in a haughty nor arrogant way, but rather from the position of someone who is passionate about his or her hometown, and who values culture. He was more confident and relaxed. Darcy even managed to crack some jokes! In the days that followed, both of them had flirted with the other. Not in an explicit, distasteful way, but rather reminiscent of Katherine Hepburn and Spencer Tracy's films. Their movie – the one they had just started to make – now lay in tatters on the cutting room floor. The game they had been playing was over.
With the news that Lydia may soon become notorious, thanks to George Wickham's – almost certainly – surreptitious taping of he and Lydia in flagrante delicto, Lizzie was fully aware that she may never see that Darcy again. In fact, she may never see Darcy at all again. He was so quick to book her flight and get a car for her that she was convinced he did so in order to distance himself and his company from her family's shame. There could be no other explanation for his rush to get her out of there.
"What about the fact that it was not that long ago that he professed his love for you, Lizzie?" a little voice inside of her asked.
No, no, no… after all of the public humiliation she had put him through and now the lurid antics of her youngest sister soon to be available just off of an exit in a small, virtual, nondescript brick building with neon lights advertising the XXX featurette starring Lydia via the information superhighway, there was no way Darcy would connect himself with her or any of her family and friends now. It would be too much of a risk, both personally and professionally, for him to do so.
Why did this have to happen now? He had just asked her to attend the theater with him! Box seats even! She was about to say yes. She didn't even care what play or musical they were going to see. In doing so, she was about to admit to him how wrong she had been about his character, how erroneous she had been about who he is as a person. Lizzie was willing to eat crow if it meant she could eat with him. If she was really lucky, she might be able to do more than eat with him.
"Don't go there Lizzie," another voice inside her head piped up. It was an all too familiar voice – the one that spoke of her doubts and insecurities, the one that made her hesitate and not take chances. She was all too familiar with it; it had separated her far too often from fulfilling her hopes and dreams. Now there were more than merely her self-doubts that were separating her from a life that she had just begun to visualize. A life where maybe she could start over in a new and exciting city with the kind of man she had only read about in more novels than she could count. Lizzie was attempting to commit all the sensory details of that brief time before she left the building, sitting on the couch with Darcy. He'd been sitting so close to her she could take in his fragrance, which he had only applied enough of that only someone in close proximity to him could detect it. When he touched her shoulder and ran it down her back, then let it linger there, she did not pull away. She didn't even flinch. It felt … soothing and warm. There was a part of her that wanted to put her forehead on his shoulder, to turn into him, wrap her arms around his torso, and release the flood of tears that she had only succeeded in holding back until she had climbed into the car that he had ordered. But that would've been too much. After abusing him to the entire Internet, or at least as much of it that cared to access YouTube, it would be too extreme of a turn of events to turn to him in a moment of crisis. It would be an unforgivable imposition. Darcy had proven he was a far better man than she had given him credit for, and it was her turn to prove she wasn't a shallow, bitchy little girl with a video camera and a big mouth.
The trouble was, that opportunity vaporized the moment she learned about Wickham's pornographic subscription website, complete with Lydia's top billing.
She had been wrong about Wickham's character. She had been even more wrong about Darcy's. Was it possible that Darcy would be there for her, to help her sort out this mess? While most of her believed that William Darcy would sever their acquaintance, she hoped that she was wrong at least one more time. Perhaps the manners he had displayed as of late were an indication of a chivalrous nature that she hoped – even prayed – he would use to rescue Lydia, and by extension, her.
Perhaps it was a pipe dream. Perhaps the whole time at Pemberley had been a dream and that she was right early on when she had referred to it as Brigadoon. Now the only place she may be able join Darcy is in her dreams. Lizzie had, in the last week, woken up four times, covered in sweat, as she had imagined his green eyes surveying her naked form, his hands and lips delicately and intimately playing over her body while she returned each gesture with passionate overtures of her own. Lizzie had thought of what he might say in that voice he had when he spoke softly to those he cared about, whispering in her ear how much he wanted her, how much he cared for her, and her unabashedly admitting the same. She thought of one of her favorite passages from Peter Pan: "You know that place between sleep and awake where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I'll always love you. That's where I'll be waiting."
Did she just admit to herself that she loved Darcy? No, not really. She couldn't. Lizzie told herself that her emotions were running high and it was just a matter of her wanting not feel so alone that made the quote pop into her head. She couldn't even think about love – or anything approaching it – right now. Lizzie needed to get her battle gear on because the war to fight for her family's reputation had just begun.
"Please make sure your trays are in the upright position as we prepare for landing."
The flight may have been smooth, but now Lizzie had to prepare for an extremely bumpy ride.