Your name is Dave Elizabeth Strider and god damn it.. your life sucks ass at the moment and you weren't even being sarcastic
It was the anniversary of that again. Dave had certainly been preparing for it. In the most ironic sense of preparing of course. His weathered red couch seemed impossibly big and suffocatingly empty for the one man. Every move he made only disturbed the dozens of half-empty beer bottles sitting around him, clinking against each other as they shifted into whatever crevices they could find in the well worn couch. Who even needed friends when ol' Jack and Daniels was at his side?
However before he could forget, Dave pulled a small business card sized piece of paper out of his pocket and squinted down at the swirling purple phone number Rose had written down for him. An "Escort Service" she says, an Escort Service your ass. who did she think he was? Dave Strider had all the bitches crawling on their hands and knees for him. Still it's not like he had anything to lose and if it didn't turn out to be what he thought it was , then well he'd be bored and probably go back to drowning any coherent thought in alcohol. At least if he was lucky and it really was a 'escort' service, he might have something that could occupy him for about an hour. Honestly though, what did he even want from this? Maybe he just wanted something new and more exciting in his life..
"Thank you for calling Paid Pleasures. How can I help you?" The woman on the other end's voice reeked of sex, a low sultry purr that she was probably used for work and Dave could almost imagine a busty blonde at a receptionist desk. He could see her giggling and twirling her bleached blonde hair with perfectly manicured nails. Wow, okay. he didn't realized how much he needed to get laid.
"Uhh.. shit." Dave had forgotten why he called for a second, her voice making his head feel fuzzy but that could be the alcohol speaking. Of course not even missing a beat, he picked up his cool right back up and composed himself. Or at least the most composed you could be when calling for a whore. The Strider training was certainly kicking in, cool and composed just like his- Nevermind. "Anyway I'm calling for an escort, name's Dave."
"Of course. Do you have any preferences?" Dave could hear a pen scratching against paper on the other end.
"I don't really know.. A brunette.. who's a little on the short side. Tanned skin, is a nice ass an option?" Dave figured that he probably shouldn't be so picky when he, for lack of a nicer word, was only choosing a prostitute to spend the night with.. But then again, it would probably be less awkward if it was a girl he was actually attracted to.
"Yes it is, don't you worry. I know exactly who you're looking for. I have to warn that that one's feisty if you're into that. Alright, all I need now is your address and the time." He quickly told her his home address, and hell if he sounded desperate, but as soon as possible would be nice. She seemed to think for a moment, and the line was temporarily silent. After a moment she told him that the fastest that she can make the 'appointment' is in 10 minutes. Fine whatever, he could wait.
After hanging up and slipping the phone in his pocket, a part of Dave was nervous. Why did he feel so nervous anyway? It wasn't like this was his first time. He was a 23 year old for god's sake. So why did he feel like a virgin right now? Instead to calm his nerves, Dave just took a swig of the last dregs of the warmed beer in the now empty bottle in his hands. Tasted like piss, at least he heard the doorbell ring and he gratefully put the bottle down to answer the door.
The person standing at the door wasn't exactly who he thought it would be, well it was technically whom he had been expecting, which was a prostitute. But not at all what he thought he would look like. Instead of all soft curves and and overdrawn pouty red lips like to movies, Dave found himself staring down at a slight man with messy bed head and dark bags under his eyes.
"Hello? Can I help you?" There must have been a mix up, there had to be a mix up. Maybe the couple next door ordered a pizza and he had gotten the address wrong.
"You're Dave, right? I'm from Paid Pleasures." He seemed to let himself into the apartment, giving a glance over to the ratty living room full of old pizza boxes and beer bottles. The man might have even wrinkled his nose in disgust at the conditions but Dave was a little too distracted to call him out on the silent judgement.
"I- uh.. sorry, but I didn't ask for a guy." He only seemed to laugh, turning to Dave to give him a look that conveyed how dumb he thought the other was.
"Look, I don't know how to tell you. Who'd you get this number from? Paid Pleasures only has 'guys'. You either got this number from a girl or the friend that gave you this is gay." That figured, but in his defense Rose was both a girl and gay. She better not be trying to pull her usual tactic of over analyzing things and deciding what's best for him without asking Dave first. 'Cause he was most definitely not gay.
If he had to be honest, Dave noticed how.. attractive the man in front of him was. Caramel brown skin, mussed up hair that looked like he had just gotten out of bed, a lean almost feminine build, and dark deep-set eyes that seemed to stare back at you and pick you apart in his head.
"My name's Karkat, thanks for fucking asking by the way. I couldn't help but wonder if your stupid thinksponge just dribbled out your ass the way you were staring at me." Karkat looked attractive his hands on his hips, as he raised a questioning eyebrow to Dave. Even if they didn't do anything, Dave already knew he would have to pay him for staying this long anyway.
Almost without thinking, Dave closed the gap between him and Karkat. His own arms slowly replacing Karkat's own on his hips. Dave was almost surprised when the boy kissed him back, it was his job after all and he didn't really expect to be pushed away. But when he pulled back breathing hard from a kiss that was all desperate tongue and teeth, Dave certainly didn't expect Karkat to be staring up at him through the brunette's thick long lashes, looking like the fucking incarnation of sex with his eyes all glassy with lust.
"Alright, just get me in your fucking bed already." And just like that, Karkat's voice leaked with sex and he pushed their lower halves closer as if to remind Dave why he was here. Dave couldn't help himself from following Karkat's command, stumbling into his room as he pushed Karkat down on the bed. The other looking up all innocently and blinking slowly up at Dave, he even had the nerve to blush as Dave stared down at him intensely.
Oh, those eyes were going to be the death of him.