Ten Years Later
"Are you ready Conrad?" a question he asked himself everyday. A new step, a new beginning, a new point in life, a new challenge that was difficult to face. Every day was easier, but he still had to watch himself not to fall into that place again. Maybe that's why it took him so long to ask. Three nights ago he had proposed to Jeannine. Who would've known after the last horrible break up that this is where they would be?
The day he bought the ring was still clear in his mind. They had only been broken up for three days and been back together for about a week, but after the time apart he knew what he wanted. Of course going into a marriage with Jeannine scared him. Not just with the average fears of marriage, but the fears that he would go through the same experience that his parents had.
Today Jeannine and Conrad were going over Cal's house to tell him the good news. Every Friday night they would join Cal for dinner and catch up with each other. Conrad found that sometimes he felt sorry for his father, alone in the big house. He didn't have the heart to sell it, too many memories. A lot like his relationship with Beth. Ten years, and neither had the heart to go through with the divorce. Both hoping that one day it could be fixed, but knowing neither can fix the broken situation.
The drive to Cal's house was not an easy hour for Conrad. He would let his mind wander, and not notice his hands squeeze the steering wheel a little too tightly. Jeannine was constantly reminding him to relax, and ask why he was so nervous. He wondered the same thing. After all his father has always been supportive of every decision he decided to make. Maybe he was having trouble excepting something so new in his life.
There was a nervous air at dinner, a very unusual tension for the group. Conrad cleared his throat.
"Dad we have some news." He said with more confidence than he thought possible. "Me and Jeannine, have decided to get married." He finished, and let out a huge breath.
"Wow, congratulations you two. Not like I didn't see this one coming, although a little later than I expected." Cal praised, and he was right. If either Conrad or Jeannine had been able to finish college sooner, their relationship might've moved further earlier. Neither wanted to get married while the other was still in school. Both were in school for eight years. Jeannine became a family lawyer, and Conrad a psychiatrist.
The rest of the night went much easier. Cal couldn't help asking wedding plans, no matter how many times Conrad and Jeannine reminded they hadn't even been engaged a week. At the end of the night, they bid their farewells, and had a much more peaceful drive home.
Later that evening Conrad and Jeannine we're getting ready for bed.
"Conrad we still haven't talked about the fight." Jeannine spoke hesitantly. Conrad ran his hand through his hair. His brow furrowed as he turned away from Jeannine.
"There isn't anything to talk about." He whispered. He heard her breathing, he could tell him avoiding the subject was making her angry, and he wouldn't be able to do it for much longer.
"Con, if we are going to get married, we're going to have to talk about having kids. I want to have a big family, and if thats not what you want, then maybe we shouldn't be together." He could tell this had been on her mind for a while.
Conrad looked at the picture frame hanging in front of him. Him and Lazenby at their college graduation, he was lucky enough to graduate with his good friend, working hard just to get back on track. He thought about how easy things were then. Jeannine and him never fought then, they barely saw each other since their schools were so far away.
Conrad took in a deep breath and began to speak his mind.
"Look Jeannine, it's not that I don't want kids, I do, it's just hard to explain. The other day you scared the crap out of me. I wasn't prepared to hear that you had a scare. I don't know if I could've been ready. I always wonder if we do have kids, am I going to be a bad dad. God Jeannine, I'm so much like her, like my mom, what if I'm the kind of parent she is. What if something happened to one of our kids, would I be able to handle it? It's so screwed up, I'm doomed as a parent." He let his deepest worries off his chest.
"Conrad, you aren't her, and worrying about things like that are exactly how you know that you won't make the same mistakes she did." Jeannine walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist, laying her head against his chest, and just like that the argument was solved.
"I'm going to call her tomorrow" he stated wrapping his arms around Jeannine "I'll tell her about the engagement. Maybe she'll fly up from Texas and come do some wedding plans. She loves stuff like that."
Beth had moved to Texas to stay close to her brother. She loved the sunny state. From time to time she wondered if she would've been better off staying with Cal and Con, but she convinced herself they were all happier this way. She always flew up twice or three times a year, and talked to Conrad almost every week on the phone. Sometimes she thinks they've grown closer being apart.
She rarely talked to Cal. Her brother often nags her to tell him she wants an official divorce. Says she'll be free, but what will be different. At a late point in her life, she couldn't see herself falling in love with anyone else. She also could never see herself being with Cal again.
Beth was finally in a place of happiness. Cal was at a place of acceptance, and Conrad was coming to terms with his fears. Although the three of them lived apart, they were still part of each other's lives. They may have their ups and downs, but somewhere in between, they all found a place of happiness.
The End
"You find out you don't have to be happy at all, to be happy you're alive" -Next to Normal