Chapter 5

Chakotay didn't know what to say. Kathryn needed to go through the steps of grieving before accepting her plight. The doctor encouraged him to be her sounding board, allow her to vent her frustrations, her fears, her sadness. His only wish was that he take this misery away, something he just couldn't do.

"Captain, I'd like to go to your quarters to scan for this virus. I'm at a loss in figuring out how you contracted it in the 1st place. With your permission, I'll check for anything that might give us a clue."

"Certainly Doctor but what do you expect?"

"Will there be any utensils, glassware, plates, or laundry that you haven't had recycled yet?"

"I guess there are some items in the laundry recycle bin that I haven't done yet, nothing else."

"How about the bathroom Captain?"

"My toothbrush is there, could you bring it back with you since you're going to be there?"

"Certainly, anything else?"

"I'd like to go back there as soon as possible. I don't want to move into sick bay just yet Doctor."

"Soon Captain."

"Chakotay, you know this means I can no longer captain Voyager. You'll have to take command on a permanent basis."

"No it does not mean anything of the sort! You're going through a terrible illness but you'll get stronger. You are still Kathryn Janeway!"

"No Chakotay. How am I supposed to foster confidence, strength, even fear if I have to from a chair?"

"You can always give that famous JANEWAY DEATH GLARE!"

A faint giggle escaped her throat. "It's good to see you smile Kathryn. I know things look grim now, but let's wait awhile before putting you out to pasture, OK?"

"Fine, but not too long. Voyager needs a strong leader to guide her home. And the crew needs to know who's in charge."

"Fine Kathryn, I'll inform Tuvok of the change in command on a temporary basis, nothing more."

Just then the doctor returned to sick bay with an object wrapped in a towel, and a bag that held personal toiletries from the captain's bathroom.

"What did you find Doctor?"

"Our 'Typhoid Mary' if you will."

"Our what", they both exclaimed.

"In the 20th century a deadly outbreak of an infection called Typhus was spread in America by a woman named Mary. She seemed to be the cause of what would turn out to be a widespread illness killing hundreds of people without she ever getting sick. She is what is known as the vector, the means by which it spread. This, Captain,( holding up the package) is the vector of this virus. He proceeded to take out the jacket worn by Amelia Earhart that was given to the captain as a souvenir.

"I have already disinfected it with a spray, but I detected live virus through this lamb's wool collar. All the while Ms. Earhart was in stasis, the virus went into a form of stasis too. When she emerged, it took a little while but these microscopic pathogens began multiplying themselves and were flourishing."

"Does this mean she is infected too?"

"Unfortunately I can't answer that. Many people were exposed to Polio in the 1930's, 40's, and 50's that never got sick, were mildly sick, or like you Captain became critically ill with devastating results. We'll just never know what became of Amelia Earhart I'm afraid."

"I hope she isn't suffering like, um, well let's just hope she's OK?"

"Sure. What do you say to something to eat?" Chakotay chimed in. "I haven't had much in the last few days and you haven't had anything. You need your strength in order to fight this thing Kathryn."

"He's right Captain. You have never been a candidate for 'Ms. Nutrition' so we'd better start getting your body ready for some intense physical therapy. You need vitamins, protein, and carbohydrate for energy. Supplements work best in combination with good nutrition."

"How about we start small. (smiling a bit) Can I have just a bowl of coffee ice cream?"

"Only if you preface it with a bowl of vegetable or chicken soup."

"Fine, veggie for him and chicken for me."

"Commander, you help her sit up, I'll go replicate the food."

Chakotay tenderly lifted her back up stuffing pillows behind her. She could only hope that this would be a temporary problem but she feared the worst. What a burden she was going to be to the crew, and Chakotay.

It was only another 2 days and Kathryn was allowed to return to her quarters. What she needed now was time for her health to return. She would need physical therapy as the doctor explained to maintain flexibility in her joints and prevent muscle atrophy and hopefully regaining the use of her legs that she lost. She needed strength to endure that regimen so the doctor provided Neelix with nutritional needs for her diet. And she needed an aide to assist her with the usual activities of daily living such as bathing, dressing and personal hygiene so the doctor suggested Crewman Celes. She was already helping the captain while she was in sick bay so he suggested she do the same in her quarters. "Mr. Paris," he explained, "could cover your shift in sick bay while the captain needs you." Always willing to be helpful, she moved in with the captain, taking a cot and setting it up in the bedroom so she was within ear shot if the captain called out in the middle of the night.

They started out feeling awkward at 1st. Kathryn was a private person and having to give up her independence for such personal matters was very difficult. And Tal could sense the captains hesitance at wanting such help but necessity took priority so a routine was established and both women began to relax around each other. The awkward silences gave way to casual conversations and each began to know the other in ways no other crew member did. There was a boundary Tal never crossed; the commander was still the only one on board who called her 'Kathryn', but they learned about each others family, schooling, hobbies, childhood etc.; things that came up in conversation so the focus wasn't on what she had to do.

As the weeks went on Kathryn saw a little improvement. Her right leg did become stronger. She was able move the hip and thigh and bend the knee. The right foot still dangled but a thin polymer brace was fitted and placed in her shoe which was hidden from view. The left leg was another story. Very little return from the thigh down. The brace on that leg went from mid thigh with a hinged knee to encompass the foot. She couldn't support much weight on that leg and could only hold herself up on the right leg for short periods of time. She was still confined to the hover chair. Despair was creeping in and Chakotay didn't know what to do.

At their usual dinner meal after Chakotay finished his shift and he relieved Tal, he thought it would be nice for a change in scenery. He reserved holodeck time and had Tom gather B'lanna, and meet them there. He didn't tell her previously for he knew she'd refuse so he just picked her up and put her in the chair from her place on the sofa.

"What are you doing?" I'm comfortable where I was."

"That's the problem. You're getting to comfortable within your quarters. There used to be a time when you spent very little time here. Now, when you're not in the bedroom, your here in the living room. You have therapy here. You take your meals here. When you retire for the night Tal tells me you read the daily department reports and go over ships business. But you aren't part of the ship any more."

"What would you have me do Chakotay? Sit on the bridge and act as if nothings changed? I can't!"

"Start small Kathryn. Just get back into being with people again. I'm taking you to Sandrine's for dessert, that's all. Just socialize with Tom and B'lanna". As he was telling her his plans he was wheeling her out the door.

"I don't even have lipstick on. I look atrocious! My hair is a mess. I can't."

You look great. I like a natural you. Your hair looks great down around your shoulders. You look comfortable."

Before she realized it they were walking through the doors of Sandrine's.

"B'lanna was the 1st to call out. Hey there, how are you feeling Captain? It's great to see you out. We've all been so worried. This guy here has been telling us you're doing well but it's nice to see for ourselves." She then proceeded to touch her hand in a friendly gesture.

As Chakotay wheeled her into position at the table, Tom moved his chair to make room and motioned for the waitress to come over.

"What'll you have Captain?"

"Just coffee for me thanks, what about you Chakotay?"

"I'll have a beer thanks."

"Remember, you're driving" she reminded him, tapping the arms on the chair.

"No problem, my limit is 2." Every one chuckled and the evening seemed to put a little sparkle in her eyes. Chakotay thought to himself how remarkable this woman was and how he'd help her in any way he could. He realized how much he loved her.

"How about you Chakotay?" B'lanna questioned. How long has it been since anyone beat you in pool?"

"Well, the Captain beat me last month but before that I don't remember. How about you Tom?"

"I've taught Harry too well. He's beat me a few times in the last month."

"That Harry is quick in learning anything"said B'lanna. I think he'll master the game soon, maybe even beat you Chakotay."

""We'll see about that the next time we're all here." Seeing Kathryn yawn he decided to call it a night. "What do you say Kathryn? Ready to go back?"

"I'm ready, good night Tom, B'lanna. This was very enjoyable. Thanks for a lovely evening."

As Chakotay started to pull the chair back, Tom and B'lanna both stood as the captain left the room. "What do you think Tom. Don't they make a nice couple? Will she ever command again?" Will she ever walk again? So many 'what if's'

"I don't know B'lanna, she seems convinced that she needs to turn command over to Chakotay permanently. I don't know if I could do it. I'd hate to be a burden on someone. I think Chakotay loves her and would accept her even like this. He'd take on that kind of burden."

"It's not a burden if you love that person."

"We can speculate all we want but it's out of our hands."

"Your right, let's go home. Computer: end program. Sandrine's disappeared to reveal the empty hologrid.