The Fanfiction University of GunSmoke

By ANBU Kakashi

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Warning(s): Author bashing, swearing.

Disclaimer: Yes, this is a spin-off of the Official Fanfiction University of Middle-Earth by Camilla Sandman!

Mrs. Sandman gave me permission to write this fanfiction.... Do, please don't hurt me. Cowers in fear from Miss Cam and her Minions.

Nor do I own Trigun. If I do own something, then I'll let ya'll know.

Summery: Vash as a teacher?! Rem preaches Love and Peace! Knives actually restrains his homicidal personality!

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One of the questions of life: why did fanfiction exist?

Answer: Because of the fans. The fans watched (or read, or listened to) to their favorite show (or book, or manga, or boy band) and they, thought, "Hey! What if such-and-such happened?"

Then, they proceeded to write down their idea, and develop a story from it.

That was why places like FanFiction Dot Net existed. A repository for all the half-planned stories to be dumped. (Except for the boy band fanfiction. And RealPerson fanfiction in general.)

But the real question wasn't why the authors did what they did; the real question was why they inflicted their putrid prose on innocent readers.

And it wasn't that all the fics were bad, Vash the Stampede decided. In fact, plenty of them were interesting, even if a bit odd. And the writers onFanFiction Dot Net at least, attempted to keep their spelling, grammar, and punctuation mistakes down.

This could not be said for the rest of the Trigun fanfiction on the Internet.

But that was why they had started this University in the first place, Vash reminded himself piously; to educate the masses and send them to do the will of the good.

At least, that was what Rem said.

Vash privately thought that his former guardian was being a little wishy-washy. She really ought to know how difficult it was to get through to adolescents in any situation. She had lived on Earth after all, right?

But then again, maybe she was just planning something and didn't want to give it away. That could be it....

"VAAAAASH!"

Vash winced at the sound of Knives voice. Sounds like Rem broke the news.

"Hello Knives," he greeted cheerfully as his twin threw the door of his room open. "How's it going?"

Knives nostrils flared as he got control of himself. "Rem has told me some rather disturbing news, brother."

"So I gathered."

Knives ignored that and stalked over to Vash's bed sitting down in a huff. "Rem has informed me that we shall be playing host, teacher, and torturer to a rather large group of adolescent female spiders."

"Knives-"

"I know that I agreed not to call...humans...spiders, but that is the only expletive I can think of to describe-"

"Yes, Knives," Vash interrupted hastily. If allowed to, Knives could go on for hours. "But why don't you like it?"

Knives snarled. "Vash, these are the people who have forced horrendous injuries upon our persons-"

"I healed just fine from the fight with that Mary-Sue -"

"Have forced upon us all the pain of incorrect punctuation, grammar, spelling-"

"That's why we have the class on it-"

"AND FURTHER MORE," Knives roared, overriding Vash's voice. "THEY HAVE FORCED EVERY SINGLE PERSON YOU'VE MET TO SEDUCE YOU!"

"It's not their fault," Vash said calmly. "And don't forget to include yourself in the category." He sighed. "Knives, that's exactly why we're building this place. That way, we can stop that kind of thing." His lips twitched. "Besides, you started it be being so overprotective and possessive."

"I did not."

"Did too."

"Did not."

"Did too."

"Did not."

"Did too."

"Did not."

"Did to-"

It was at that point that the twins had to stop arguing; the University's Gun Room had blown up. Most likely it was due to (as Knives put it) "That idiot E.G. Mine."

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Whew.....

Well, review!