CSI: Wizarding World

Chapter 1 -- Fanboys

Greg Sanders blinked at the flash on his camera; looking over the third case in three days with absolutely no cause of death other than a small scratch on the forehead.

"Hey, did you guys see Half-Blood Prince last night?" Greg asked, looking away from his camera. Grissom, Catherine and Nick looked up at him in disbelief. "What'd I say?"

"We're standing here with an impossible case and you ask us about Harry Potter?" Nick laughed.

"Well...yeah," Greg shrugged. "'Cause watch this," He picked up a shredded stick no more than five inches long. He held it in his right hand and pointed it at the victim. "Avada Kedavra,"

Grissom snorted and pointed at the cut on her forehead. "Explain that,"

Greg grinned and held his arm across his body. "Sectumsempra," he hissed as his arm whepped back to his right side.

Catherine laughed and covered her mouth with her hand.

"Wait," Nick held his hand up. "Only two people knew that curse."

"Ha!" Greg grinned, holding the stick up to Nick. "You did see it...or at least read it,"

"Fine, you caught me," Nick smiled. "But still...only three people knew that curse. Snape and Harry."

"Correction," Greg said matter-of-factly. "Only two people that we know of knew that curse. Besides, Snape is dead. Harry Potter is not a killer by any means."

Greg looked down at the vic, almost doubting his last statement. At least I really hope he's not... he thought.

"Why are we discussing a fictional children's book?" Grisson sighed. "When we could be trying to figure out who...or what, killed the poor girl?"

"Becuase it makes sense!" Nick and Greg immediately began to defend the popular book series. "Besides, what other explanation do you have?" Greg continued.

"I don't...but..." Grissom shook his head. "Fine. How did the killer get away?"

Greg looked around him and got down on his knees. Shifting his hand around on the ground, he stood up with a full beer bottle and a grin plstered on his face.

"Portkey," he announced with a straight face. "Has anyone here not read Harry Potter?"

Catherine was the only one to say, "Yes,"

"A portkey is a seemingly normal item in the Wizarding World that can transport a wizard or witch to a location he sets it to," Nick explained.

Catherine nodded.

"There's only one way to figure out if this is a portkey," Greg held out the bottle in front of the other three CSIs. "Put your hands on it."

Nick and Catherine immediately placed their right hands on the bottle but Grissom hung back, hesitant.

"Greg..." Grissom said, eying the bottle with curiosity but also with an actual hint of fear.

"Grissom, put your damn hand on the bottle or so help me..." Greg growled. Grissom rolled his eyes and placed his hand on the bottle.

"One, two..." Greg counted, dragging on the 'two' for suspense.

"Just say it!" Nick, Catherine, and Grissom chorused.

"Three."

A second passed and nothing happened.

"Well that was a -- " Nick started, but was interrupted by a pulling at his naval. Three of the four CSIs screamed as they were pulled in; only Grissom was silent.

The four CSIs landed in a heap, each emitting a small humph.

" -- waste of time," Nick groaned,sitting up and attempting to breathe again.

"Nice observational skills, Greg," Grissom commented, standing up. "Looks like you two were right. Now all we need to do is figure out who performed the curses. Where are we?"

Greg looked up. They were outside a house of some sorts. The last name of the owners was stamped across it. 'POTTER,' Oh my god...

"What is it, Greg?" Catherine and Grissom simultaneously asked.

Greg pointed at the mailbox, unable to say anything. Yes, his favorite book characters ever were real and he figured it out...but now Harry Potter was the main suspect in their investigation,

"Oh," Grissom stated, staring at the mailbox. "Usually I have something smart to say right about now, but this is ridiculous..."

(AN: Whoo are you? Who, who. Who, who. Whoooo are you?...)