Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Ouran High School Host Club characters. Period. No, seriously, I put a period there.
AN: This was inspired by a game of racquetball my friend and I played. The events did actually happen. Well, not the fangirls, the taking off of the shirts, and having Huni and Mori come in, of course. But all the injuries are true. I did hit myself in the head with my racket. I am that amazing.
Hikaru and Kaoru Hitachiin were going to play racquetball. But, being in the Host Club like they were, they had at least ten fangirls following them to watch. All together, they walked to the school's gym. As the twins got their gear, the poor attendant was trying to figure out where all the girls were going to go.
"Just ignore them," Hikaru said. "They're just watching. As long as there is a window, and there is no fights, they will be fine." The attendant nodded meekly as the group walked to one of the two empty courts.
When Hikaru was putting his safety glasses on, Kaoru nervously fingered his racket. "Hikaru, did we really have to invite all those girls to watch us? We really don't even know how to play! All we do is hit the ball around, and attempt not to get hurt or hit."
"Kaoru, Kaoru, Kaoru. It doesn't matter. As long as we look like we know what we are doing, they'll think that we know what we are doing. It's circle logic." Hikaru took some practice swings, and hit himself in the face. "Besides," he said, rubbing his face, "the room is soundproof. We can make fun of them, and they won't even hear it."
Kaoru laughed, and then picked up the blue ball. He threw it up in the air, and then hit it. It started to ricochet off the walls, with both boys ducking, running, and swinging into the empty space underneath the ball. Hikaru finally managed to hit it, and it went straight into the floor.
"You know, Hikaru," Kaoru said as he ducked under his ricocheting serve, "this would be so much easier if those girls weren't staring so intently at us. It feels like they are watching my every move. And, if I do anything wrong, they'll kill me or something." He jogged around to whack the ball. It flew neatly an inch over Hikaru's head. Luckily, he ducked in just enough time. Hikaru threw Kaoru an angry look as Kaoru laughed behind his empty hand.
"Well, just forget about them. They won't kill you. They'll probably be the ones dying." Hikaru hit the ball in such a way that it would hit Kaoru. When it did, Hikaru started laughing. What he didn't notice was that the ball still had some momentum, and rebounded off a wall to hit Hikaru. Hikaru stopped laughing and rubbed his injured bottom. Kaoru started laughing at him.
"Well, that backfired on you, didn't it?" Kaoru took off his glasses and reached for his water bottle. The room was hotter than Hades. Out of every room in the entire school to not have air conditioning, it had to be the racquetball courts. Hikaru took off his shirt, and they felt the ground shake slightly.
Both of the twins' heads snapped towards the window leading to the hall. Half of the girls had mysteriously disappeared, and half of the rest that were standing were passed out in another girls' arms. Kaoru looked at Hikaru out of the corner of his eye. Just because Hikaru took off his shirt shouldn't have made that many girls pass out. Kaoru should get the rest of the girls to pass out, just by taking his shirt off. Just by taking his shirt off. But, he didn't do it. He was going to do it later, then add some "brotherly love" for the ladies, even though neither party could hear each other. Still, he would try it.
Hikaru picked up a ball ass Kaoru slid his safety glasses back down his face. They continued in their attempts to hit the ball back to the wall, but only succeeded a few times. And the few times that they did mange to hit the ball, it would hit the wall, hard, and go flying into the empty air. Occasionally, it would hit one of the twins.
Kaoru had hit himself in his forehead with his racket. He dropped the racket, over dramatizing the situation to see if Hikaru caught his drift so they could give the girls a little show. Thankfully, Hikaru did. He rushed over to Kaoru's side, holding him. They could almost hear the fangirls' squeal. Instead of saying something totally twincest, like they normally would have done for the girls, they just had a rather short conversation.
"Way to go, you idiot. You managed to hit yourself in the head. With your own racket, I might add. I think it takes major skill to do that," Hikaru teased.
"Oh, please. You did that earlier. Besides, I made a wonderful moment for our female viewers. They'll love it! Now, do something. Like, kiss where I hit myself or something. We do have an appearance to keep up, you know." They both didn't like the act that they had to put up with sometimes. But, it was the only way that they could get friends. "Friends" or fangirls. Except for the other hosts. They were nice to the Hitachiin twins. Especially Haruhi. She knew that they didn't like their act very much, and agreed with them. Mori didn't say much, Tamaki and Huni said too much, and Kyoya was always stuck in his world of numbers. Other than each other, they had Haruhi. Whenever Tamaki didn't have her.
They separated after Hikaru 'lovingly' kissed Kaoru's wound. Then, Hikaru had an idea. An evil, devious idea. He took the other two balls that they had gotten, and the last remaining ball. Hikaru gave Kaoru one, then served both balls. They were going to try to keep all three balls up and bouncing the entire time. That didn't work out as well as they had planned.
If one ball was up, the other two were on the ground. But, neither twin could keep all the balls bouncing all the time. They were constantly ducking, trying to get a ball up, and tiring out fast. Pretty soon, they were tired again, and they decided to stop with the three balls. One ball would suffice for their needs for the time being.
Almost all of the girls that had passed out, before and after their twincest moment, had regained consciousness. Kaoru decided that it would be the best time for him to take his shirt off. It would help their game of racquetball if all the girls were passed out, not staring intently. It freaked Kaoru out more than he could stand.
At the most opportune moment, he took his shirt off. They could actually hear the squeals of the fangirls this time. It was just too much for them to see both twins shirtless, sweaty, and staring at each other with a look of what seemed like desire. 99% of the girls disappeared instantly. Only one lone girl stood. She was saying something, her sea green eyes were unfocused, as if she were blind. Her short black hair was flipping around her head as the turned it back and forth, saying something. (AN: Silly Toph, appearing in an Ouran High School Host Club one-shot.)
"Now, let's really play since we have some peace." Hikaru said whilst giving Kaoru an evil smile. She they hit the ball as hard, fast, and often as they could.
After a particularly good hit, Kaoru served right as he heard the door open. Huni and Mori stepped in, decked out in their gear, too.
"Hey Hikaru and Ka-," he was cut off when the ricocheting ball hit Huni upside the head. He started to cry softly when Mori picked him up. Huni started, and cried into Mori's shoulder slightly.
"Sorry about that. We were going to play next door, when Huni saw all the passed out fangirls. He just wanted to say hi really fast," Mori said before bowing slightly, then leaving as fast as they came in.
Hikaru and Kaoru took a small break. They stepped into the hallway for a bit. The court was really getting unbearable. They'd rather risk the fangirls, rather than dying of heat stroke. Luckily, the only one that was still conscience was the black haired girl. She nodded to acknowledge their presence, but didn't advance on them in anyway. She was the first girl to ever do that.
They went back into the court when one of the girls started to stir. After a quick conversation, they decided it would be best if they waited until all the girls were conscience before they stopped playing.
That didn't take long, but in that time, Hikaru got hit between the eyes once, and one more time on his butt. Kaoru got a hit on his chin, and two hits on his arm. Really, they got off easy.
As they were walking back to return their equipment, they heard the attendant saying something about reserving a time. When they rounded the last corner, they saw Tamaki, Haruhi, and Kyoya standing at the counter.
"Are you guys done?" the attendant asked. The twins nodded in unison. "Then you can take their court." Tamaki nodded.
"Kyoya, don't forget your protective eyeglasses," Haruhi said, giving the glasses to Kyoya.
Hikaru and Kaoru set their stuff on the counter, then left. The group of girls followed closely behind them.
'Maybe,' Kaoru thought, as he looked at the girl with the sea green eyes, 'we should play racquetball more often.'