She didn't turn around when he finally breached the top of the cliff upon which she stood, though it wasn't as though he expected her to. He'd be surprised if she didn't know he had come around.
The breeze moved the deep red leaves of her hair, and Canach would think the scene would make a beautiful painting of his commander looking out over the chaotic horizon, were it not for the current circumstances. The hammer she'd taken from Balthazar's herald lay not far from her, surrounded by broken glass. In her right hand was a bottle, and the other was clenched in a tight fist. It was only once he moved closer that he saw the golden sap trickling down her closed fingers and dripping to the rock below.
Unable to allow her to stand in silence any longer, Canach moved forward and took her left wrist in his hand, raising it up to pry her fingers open. All she did in response was raise the bottle to her lips, staring forward with dull, white eyes.
"And just what was this going to do?" he asked as he pulled the glass shard from her palm. The female sylvari gave a shrug, lowering the bottle.
"A good person died today - perhaps many more than I realized. Is it a crime to feel a little pain myself?" Canach looked her over, taking note of the untreated wounds from her earlier battles that day.
"You have plenty of wounds for that already. Velancea -"
"I couldn't save him, Canach," the commander spoke, her voice soft and broken. Already, this was becoming a side of her he'd never seen as the tears poled in her eyes. "I can't save anyone..."
"The mass of people down there in Sun's Refuge begs to differ. You saved many lives today - lives that would have otherwise been lost had you not come around." Velancea's lower lip trembled and her brow furrowed.
"I should have known. I should have known he was lying... I shouldn't have left him to fix the damn tracker, I -"
"And where would we be had Blish not done what he did? You said the tracker was broken and that he used himself to power it, did you not? Had you gone back for him, we would be here with no sword and no tell as to where Kralkatorrik may go next. We may also be without a commander, as well." The tears spilled from her eyes and a sob ripped from her throat. She knew he was right, but Blish was still gone.
Aurene was missing.
And Taimi...
Another broken sob and Canach grabbed her, pulling her against his chest. The bottle fell to the ground and Velancea's arms were quick to clutch at him as she cried against him, loud and pained and broken. He put his chin atop her head and watched the branded chaos below.
When he'd arrived at Sun's Refuge to meet up with Braham and Dragon's Watch, he'd been surprised to see Caithe.
"What's going on?" he'd asked as he noticed the solemn looks on their faces. The thief had shaken her head.
"Quite a bit. I'm afraid there is not much great news to share. Velancea managed to get a tracker onto Kralkatorrik, but -"
"Where is she?"
"After giving us a rundown of what happened in the Mists, she took a few bottles and left. I cannot imagine she's gone too far," Caithe had said, nodding her head towards the entrance of the cavern.
"So no one has gone to search for her?"
"After what has happened, do you think anyone would? I've not seen her quite like that in... a very long time." Trahearne's image and demise flashed through Canach's mind, and that was when he had asked for further details on the day, then went off to search for her. She may put up the tough persona of the Commander, but she was still Velancea, and whether she showed it or not, even she had her limits.
"I'm sorry I wasn't there..." he murmured once she'd quieted to soft, shuddering breaths. Velancea shook her head.
"I'm glad you weren't. It seems like this could just be the end of... everything." Her fingers dug into the armor of his back. "Even Braham made peace, saying he may not get a chance to do it any other time... You not being there meant you were safe for the most part."
"This is not the end." It seemed pathetic, but it was all Canach could say to that. She couldn't lose hope - he wouldn't allow it.
"But -"
"No buts, Vel. Things may seem terrifying at the time being; however, you have Dragon's Watch by your side and many others making offers every day to help us in our missions." At the word 'us,' she seemed to become a little less tense in his arms. She needed to know that everything was not her own burden to bear. She was not alone.
A soft sob escaped her lips.
"Please, don't go... I - I need constants in my life. I can't... I can't lose you as I've lost others..." Her voice was so soft that Canach almost didn't ear her, and yet... he heard her loud and clear. He pressed her head further against him, fingers slipping into her leafy hair.
"You should know well by now that there is no getting rid of me, even if you wanted to." He'd meant to lighten the mood, but she only shook her head.
"Please, just... stay." He moved to press his lips to the top of her head.
"I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere - I assure you of that."
There was no saying what tomorrow would bring, but for the time being, Canach only cared to think of his commander. She'd return to her typical persona soon enough, but until then, his shoulder was hers to lean and cry on. Pale Mother knows she needed it.
