It's a Tuesday and it's you're day off. You wish you could tell people that you were doing something exciting, like taking your kids to Disneyland. But you don't have any kids, so that's just stupid to even think about.

Derek went back to work a few months after he was shot, so did Alex, and to be honest, you're glad they did. Doting wife and hospitable friend just aren't your forte. All of the constant smiling was making your face hurt and it took the earth for you not to scream in their faces "get your own god damn remote!" but you couldn't do that. You're supposed to be happy now, bright, shiny. After all, what don't you have to be happy about? A great post-it husband, good remaining friends; you know, the ones that didn't get cancer or hit by buses; an admirable job and a not-yet-been-constructed house in the woods. What don't you have to be happy about?

In reality, these things don't seem so great right now. Derek's being a pain in the ass, and while he gets to be a pain in the ass for a while, after all he was shot; he doesn't get to treat you like you're his little bitch. You're his wife, and you're not an idiot, medicine tells you that after five months, a patient who recieved a gun shot wound to the chest can get up off of the couch and make a sandwich himself. And Alex. Alex just shut off from everyone completely. You think this little thing with him and Lexie is over, and you're kind of glad, it just never seemed right anyway. You know he misses Izzie, and she did call, numerous times after the shooting, but he didn't reply and so eventually you told her to stop calling. That broke your heart. It's not something that you'll tell to anyone really, but you miss Izzie so much, and George, and them being gone has caused this sadness in your life right now. It was always supposed to be the five of you. Bailey's interns. You started out together, you were a family. But not anymore. Now there is too much water under the bridge or whatever and George went a joined the army and Izzie went and got cancer, and then Cristina goes and gets a jackass of a boyfriend, whose crap she puts up with for no reason apparent to you, and all that turns to crap.

George's stuff is still in the attic. His Mom only took a few things. When he moved out, he left a lot of stuff behind, you think he did that on purpose, so he'd always have a reason to come by, but he wouldn't need a reason. He's George, your friend, who you love. Loved. Izzie's stuff is still in her room. She didn't take much with her. You know that she didn't leave because she wanted to, because she didn't want to. You think she left some things so that if she ever really needed to, she'd have a cause to come back. You really hope she will, but you don't hold your breath. She probably won't now.

You decide to go up to the attic. You haven't been there for a while, and Lexie has finally moved all of her crap out of there. It's so dusty up there. Everything seems like it's been there decades, not a couple of years or months. In the corner there is a box marked 'George's stuff – Izzie don't touch'. You smile because that's totally something George would say, knowing that Izzie would look through it. You think screw it, because George is dead, he'll never know, and besides, you're not Izzie, so you're not really doing anything wrong. In the box there are his video games and you wondered if he ever actually got to finish a game. Between work and you and Izzie storming in his room, he didn't have much time. There's a sweater that smells like him. It's stupid, but it feels warms and so you hold it close to you, trying to make it seem as though he's there with you. But what do you expect, to turn around and see him there? No. Now you're just being an idiot.

There are a couple more things in this box, but another box catches your eye. Opposite to you there's one saying 'Isobel Stevens, 360-5147-8026, Fragile – Handle with care'. That's probably when she first moved to Seattle. She had a thing with hoarding everything; she'd throw nothing away, not even a cardboard box evidently. There was an old recipe book, with food stains all over it. You remember how nice it was to come home to a house smelling sweet of some new meal or baked treat Izzie had prepared. You think about all of the times that she baked like crazy, and how much she must have had on her mind and you get angry at yourself for not asking her. After all, like she said, "we don't know everything about each other". Also in her box is a framed photograph of the five of you. You're in the tunnels at work, and you remember that Izzie had gotten a nurse to take a photo of you to mark your first whole year as interns. As expected, Izzie has a huge 1800 watt smile on her face. Alex looks on with a smirk, and is probably thinking more about getting with the nurse, or getting Izzie to go out with him later. Cristina looks to be giving a hint of a smile, obviously for Izzie's sake, and to save the rest of them having to have ten more shots to get the perfect picture. George is giving his usual smile, and seems to be genuinely happy, and you are smiling too. Just a small smile, but in that moment, with those people, you can honestly say that you were happy too.

You cling to the photograph and close your eyes, hoping that when you open your eyes, everything will be how it used to be, but that's just irrational thinking. You know that can't happen, no matter how much you want it to.

You think about all of the times you spent together, as a family and realize that although you didn't have that much time together, the time you did have was some of the best times of your life. You think about George, and wonder if he's in heaven, if there even is a heaven. But you know that he was a good person. You think about Izzie and where she is now. The last time she called she had no job since being rejected by Tacoma, and so was working in a diner again, like she had done as a teenager. You hope that she'll find herself a good job, she deserves it after all she's been through, and you pray that one day she'll come back. You think about Cristina, and how much she must really care about Owen, and after all the time she's been there for you, you know you have to at least give the guy a chance, even if you don't like it. And then you think about Alex, and think about just how much he tries to put on a front, but just how transparent he really is. You swear to yourself that you're not going to let him turn back to his old ways, and make it your own little mission to get him to call Izzie back.

Yeah, you may not all be together anymore, but in heart you are, and for the sake of George and Izzie, the three of you who remain are not going to drift apart; you won't allow it. And yeah, you'll argue and moan at Derek and still feel like you want to kill him sometimes, but you'll try to be more like the stereotype you are supposed to fit into, and be happy, because even though he'll be there, being annoying, he'll still be there. Breathing, alive, and that is better than the alternative.

Yeah, so maybe you didn't take your kids to Disneyland, or go to a spa, but today; your day off; was the best day that you've had in a long time.