Tower workers and Guardians alike all but jumped out of the way as the female Hunter stalked down the hallway with a scowl on her face that would send a Hive ogre running in terror.
"Alysia wait! Come on you know we were just teasing! I know you can hear me!"
Oh she heard them calling out all right but she didn't slow down until she was through the hallway and came out of the doors leading to the North section of The Tower. The Speaker was just ahead of her. New Monarcy's section was to the left along with Guardian Outfitters and the hallway leading to the Tower Plaza. A couple of workers glanced up as she turned right and breezed by but they wisely left her alone as she stalked over to the far corner or the open area and leaned against the railing. Gripping the metal tightly she took a deep breath and closed her eyes.
This wasn't really anything new. Alysia heard how they spoke about her whether her back was turned or not. No amount of whispering could hide how they looked at her after yet another disastrous mission. Three fireteams so far. Six Guardian's dead. How could they not start rumors about her? The Kiss of Death they had started calling it. At this point a few of the other Guardians had started saying that anyone who paired up with her was bound to turn up dead. Even Cayde-6 the Hunter Vanguard was making bets against her. Okay, to be fair Cayde-6 made bets on everything but that was beside the point.
Alysia could feel her Ghost hovering there just behind her left shoulder but she wasn't in the mood for reassurances or platitudes. Instead she leaned on the railing and stared out at the city below. The sun had set and all the streets and buildings were lit up as the citizens went about their business. Seeing the city reminded her of her job, her responsibility. The whole reason she hadn't turned her back on being a Guardian.
Yet at least.
Everyone knew that Ghosts had been created by The Traveler and that they sought out their Guardians among the ancient dead. Those who had lived and fought before. While there had been countless warriors protecting Earth and other colonies at one time all of them were now dead and not all of them were going to be brought back. Even now their current numbers still felt dangerously low at times. So many people down there expecting the Guardians to keep them safe. Numbers crept up as more Ghosts found their chosen partners but at the same time Guardian's were dying out in the field every week. It was a dangerous balancing act.
Few ever gave voice to the thought but it was always hidden there in their minds with each wide-eyed, empty minded newbie that showed up in The Tower after the firm urging of their newly found Ghost. That one thought that so few ever actually dared to speak.
What if the Ghost made a mistake?
Guardian's died. Ghosts died. Sometimes they died separately. Heartbroken Guardians dragging their feet back from a failed mission as they explained to the Vanguard and The Speaker about how they had been overrun, captured, surprised, it didn't matter what the reason. Another Ghost was gone. Another proud warrior was now sent out to provide security for the city instead of wandering the wilds trying to recover ancient secrets or fulfill missions. Going outside the city walls without a Ghost or a Guardian for protection was just too risky. A Ghost could revive their dead partner but once that Ghost was gone it was just too much of a risk. Of course some disobeyed. They usually were found dead a few days or weeks later.
Then there were the Ghosts themselves. Usually if they lost their partner the Ghost didn't last long afterwords. Either they were captured and used by the enemy or they lost their Light and died themselves. The Warlocks debated and argued over the how's and why's of it but no one had a real answer yet.
A few Ghosts had come back after losing their Guardian's but they were clearly changed because of it. They kept to themselves and on the rare occasion that you could engage one in conversation it was obvious that the spark of life inside them was gone. Vanquished along with the Guardian they had chosen and cared for.
Until Alysia. Until a Ghost who had already lost their Guardian suddenly started venturing out of The Tower again. Leaving the city and even hiding away in jump ships when other Guardian's ventured out. All of its actions suggested that it was searching for a new partner, a rather controversial theory that sent the Warlocks into yet more heated debates. Guardian's died. Ghosts died. Sometimes one lived on without the other but a Guardian was never chosen again by a new Ghost and a Ghost never chose a new Guardian.
At least not until I came along and screwed everything up, Alysia thought with a heavy sigh. She rested her elbows on the railing and dropped her head into her hands. Closing her eyes she tried again to pretend like the teasing and rumors didn't bother her. Not even a few seconds later she felt a gentle bump against her arm.
"Go away," she said without bothering to lift up her head. She knew it was her Ghost trying to cheer her up again like it always did. "I don't want to be cheered up I want to wallow in misery and think about what a failure I am," she insisted and received an electronic sigh in response.
"Come on Alysia you know what they said isn't true..." her Ghost tried and now she lifted her head and settled on glaring at the little floating robot.
"Six Guardian's have died. Six. All of them paired up with me. I never should have been made a Guardian at all I was just..." she stopped immediately and looked away but the Ghost zipped back in front of her face.
"Oh no you don't. We've been through this before. It's true. I did lose my previous Guardian. Does that mean I made a mistake then? Was the previous Hunter Vanguard a mistake as well because they didn't survive their attempt to make survey the Vault of Glass?" it pressed her and she grimaced and shifted her eyes away again.
"That's different. They were brought back. They were warriors. Fighters. Soldiers. Whatever you want to call them. Both of them fought before. Maybe they don't remember it or remember only bits and pieces but they've fought against our enemies in the past," she stopped and stood up straighter folding her arms across her chest.
"And me? I wasn't a fighter or a soldier. I had never even held a gun before you found me. How could I be anything other than a mistake? An accident?" Alysia spat out and immediately regretted in when her Ghost visibly drooped in disappointment.
"That's not to say I don't like you! I do! But I mean look at how this looks to everyone else! A Ghost loses their partner and then instead of one of the few former Guardian's that are running security in the city it sneaks away on a jump ship heading out to the wilds and chooses a civilian from a group of survivors. Not even a soldier or mercenary but a farmer? What else are people supposed to say about this? About me? About us?" she fired back and her Ghost narrowed its one eye and then looked down for a moment before glancing back up at her.
"Um... give me a minute on that one."
Sighing heavily Alysia turned around and leaned with her back to the open air. To her surprise she saw Cayde-6 standing there arms folded as he watched her with his steady, soul-searching exo gaze.
"So here you are. The other Guardian's getting to you again?" he asked walking up beside her and leaning with his arms on the railing. He stared down at the city as he spoke.
"There's a reason why I keep to myself and not just because of my apparent 'Kiss of Death.' I mean we can't exactly afford to lose more Guardians. Even if The Traveler's Light is finally starting to grow stronger again," Alysia confessed with a small glance over at him but he was still staring off into the distance.
"You sure? I mean cause I got a few bets riding on you right now and..." Cayde-6 trailed off and quickly straightened up with his hands in the air when she glared furiously at him. Wisely the Vanguard took a step away from her as Alysia turned away with a scowl set on her face.
"Okay, okay bad time but really so what if your Ghost made a mistake? So what if it chose a scared young farmer to be their new Guardian instead of a dead soldier whose bones have been sitting abandoned and forgotten for a few... hmm... several centuries?" he offered up and immediately she frowned at him wishing he would get to the point.
"None of us can run from the past, Alysia. Even those of us who can't quite remember all of it," he told her but then softened his tone of voice more. "The facts are the facts and the past is the past. I don't want to dwell on how I ended up being Vanguard here either but ignoring it doesn't change the fact that it happened. It doesn't change the guilt I feel wondering if maybe... maybe if that bet had turned out differently my friend might still be alive," Cayde-6 trailed off and shook his head.
Alysia grimaced and rubbed her arm uncomfortably. For a long silent minute she stood there quietly, unsure of how to respond to that.
"I miss the farm. I miss helping my parents grow new life from the dust and ashes the Collapse left behind. I miss seeing a caravan in the distance and being able to make a meal for them or help them resupply. I miss getting up each day and knowing what was ahead of me. Life out in the wilderness wasn't easy but we survived. Now it just feels like I'm cheating death each time I go out at the expense of someone else's life," she said honestly.
"Hey... a lot of us miss things from before. Before I became a Vanguard, before we learned about the Vex, before we found out the Hive have been on earth for Traveler only knows how long. What happened in the past is part of all of us but are you going to let it define you forever?" Cayde-6 asked in return. "Are you going to let others use it to define who you are? Cause I've won a lot of bets watching you shoot others down," he added with an unrepentant chuckle at the memory. When she started glaring at him again he coughed and quickly moved on.
"The point is that Ghost chose you. Out of all the survivors left it wanted you and you alone," he paused and pointed to the Ghost still floating beside her shoulder. "Does it matter if it was a mistake or not? You have an ability that most of the people down there never will. The ability to fight and to protect others. Guardian's die and more are going to die in the future. But if you get to save one person, just one..." Cayde-6 paused and took a sheathed knife from his side and handed it over to him.
"Then that will make all of this worthwhile. You have the talent, the ability... you just need to believe in yourself. Believe in your Ghost. Maybe you weren't the right choice back then but you are most definitely the right choice now," Cayde-6 said lifting her hand and pressing the knife into it. Alysia could tell he meant those words. Every last one of them. Taking the knife, she stared at it quietly and then tightened her fingers around it.
"I appreciate the nice words but tell me the truth Cayde... do you think my Ghost made a mistake?" she asked as her Ghost floated back around in front of her and glanced between the two of them. Cayde-6 hummed and rubbed his lower jaw for a moment before answering.
"I think this whole thing is a mistake honestly."
Well I wasn't expecting that, Alysia thought raising an eyebrow curiously at him. Cayde-6 shrugged and motioned to the area around them.
"You've got a Warlock who doesn't like debates, a Hunter who makes far too many bets and is only a leader because they don't trust anyone else to to it, a titan who treats everything like some life or death struggle for survival and can't take a joke, a Crucible leader that I swear throws Guardians against each other in arenas for his own twisted amusement and an exo with a memory like swiss cheese handling rifles and rocket launchers on a daily basis," Cayde-6 ticked the points off on his fingers as he went.
"Factions who can't decide between war, leaving the planet, or new leadership as the best method for what's left of us and then there's the creepy figure in black that only appears on the weekends and has funky shadowy tentacle things coming out from under his hood. I mean do you really even need me to keep going?" he asked pointedly. Alysia couldn't help but burst into laughter as his descriptions.
"All right you have a point there but..." she started but got cut off by him.
"But nothing. Instead of choosing Guardian's from among the living and training them the Ghosts choose dead ones. Never fully understood the reasoning behind that myself. You've got people who worship The Traveler as a god, others who think the very idea is ridiculous, some who just want to study what it can do and what it has done for us in peace and others who think that The Traveler itself is evil and the source of all the trouble in the first place," Cayde-6 stopped and shook his head.
"Honestly a Ghost choosing you as their Guardian is the last thing I'm worried about. At least you have enough sense not to pick up wild berries and eat them as a snack only to get transported back here half dead from poison by their..." Cayde-6 stopped and cleared his throat.
"The point is at least we got to train you how to fight properly before throwing you out to face the Fallen. Some Guardian's die and have to be revived by their Ghosts several times before they even make it back to the city in the first place," he sniffed at the last comment and Alysia knew who he meant. The last new Guardian that had been found had just barely made it back alive. Well alive again. What little armor they had was riddled with bullet holes and they had resorted to using the rifle as a club before another fireteam saw them and picked them up.
"I'm not entirely convinced..." Alysia warned him, "But I appreciate your words, Cayde. Thanks. I really needed that. I promise I won't let the city down," she vowed raising her head with renewed pride as her Ghost perked up and floated in a circle around her.
"See! I told you! Why don't we go visit the new guy? He's still getting used to being here and I bet they could use some reassurance," her Ghost offered and Cayde-6 clapped his hands together.
"Great! I'll also warn the other Guardian's to ease up already. We need to work together right now not piss each other off at every turn. So if that's settled I had bet with Banshee that you couldn't shoot a bottle off his head with your eyes closed from across the Tower Plaza..." he trailed off slowly and Alysia laughed and punched him lightly on the arm.
"You're a jerk you know that?"
"Aww, you Guardians say the sweetest things to me. Now hurry up I've got some glimmer to win."
"Oh you are going down. I hope you're ready to pay up."
AN: I took what I knew of the story both in-game and from the Grimore cards and filled in the gaps a bit on places were I wasn't entirely sure. Some things I made up like what happens when a Ghost or a Guardian dies. I was inspired by a mission on the moon in the game where you find a dead Guardian and then go hunting for their Ghost only to find that it's already dead. So I took that and expanded on it a bit. I tried to make everything as accurate or plausible as I could so I hope you enjoyed it!