Beep beep beep beep…

Ugh I despised that noise.

I rolled over and smacked the top of my alarm clock shutting it up long enough for me to hit the off switch.

I climbed out of my soft warm bed that was still calling my name and headed for the shower.

I shed my clothes, leaving them in a pile on the cold bathroom tile.

Still being half asleep I forgot to let the water warm before stepping into the shower. I let out a squeal as the freezing water hit my shoulders.

He smacked my butt before turning on the shower and stepping inside. I squealed as the cold spray his my butt.

"couldn't you have waited until it had warmed up?"

he lowered me to my feet and smiled at me

"nope"

he yanked me against him and kissed me roughly.

I shook my head forcefully willing the flashback away.

I showered, then stepping out, I wrapped a clean white towel around me tightly and headed into my closet.

I pulled on some cutoff shorts and a tank top. I threw a baggy shirt over the tank and let it hang off one shoulder. I ran a brush threw my hair and not bothering to fuss with makeup, I walked back into my room.

I stood in front of the calendar hanging on my wall and bit my lip as I took the purple sharpie and marked off another day.

It was July 6th

It had been exactly thirty one days eight hours and twelve minutes since I had last seen Jason.

I had spent the last month searching for him desperately. It seemed every lead I got only led me to a dead end.

The police were no longer looking for him because they thought he was dead.

Just like he wanted them to.

But I wasn't giving up.

I sighed and headed downstairs for breakfast. Mom was sitting at the bar sipping coffee and reading the morning paper.

"hi mom" I walked over and kissed her forehead

"hi honey. Are you excited? Today's the big day"

I sighed. Yes today was the big day.

The day I started my first job.

I had gotten a gig at a local bar singing.

"yeah I guess I" excited. Kind of nervous though"

She smiled and ruffled my hair

"oh nonsense honey you'll do great"

She looked down at her watch

"I have to get to work"

"okay mom bye"

I hugged her goodbye before going to the pantry to grab a banana.

I trudged back upstairs and into the study taking a seat behind the long oak desk in the middle of the room.

Placing the banana down on the desk I propped my chin in my hands and stared at the huge map on the wall.

Where are you Jason.

I turned to the computer and opened a web page on Jason. It told me pretty much everything about him like his birthday, his family history, his criminal records, his hometown…

his hometown

No he wouldn't be that stupid.

I sighed and peeled my banana unenthusiastically.

Im going to find you Jason. No matter how long it takes im not giving up.

Jason's POV

I walked idly down the back alley of the neighborhood. I looked up when I heard footsteps heading towards me.

It was a bad neighborhood and you had to be stupid or badass to walk down this alley. But stupidity was about to pay off for me big time.

I hid behind a trash bin and watched as the guy and girl got closer and closer.

The girl was pretty with long dark hair that curled wildly around her face and shoulders. Her deep brown eyes were intriguing.

But she was nothing compared to Riley.

They walked past the trash bin and I jumped out shooting the guy in the chest with my gun.

He fell to the ground and I covered the girls mouth before she could scream.

I killed her just as quickly not really feeling like torturing anyone today.

I pulled out the guys wallet and took out his license.

Christopher Joshua Livingston.

It wasn't as sexy as Jason McCann but it would have to do.

I wasn't going to kill him and then just throw it all away because of his name.

And besides I had killed him for a reason.

He looked incredibly similar to me. Aside from his blonde hair and blue eyes we were practically twins.

All I needed was some hair die and color contacts and I would be Chris Livingston.

But it gets better.

Last week Riley bumped into him and thought he was me.

Yes I still watched riley but just to keep her safe.

At least that's what I tell myself.

Anyways It took him forever to convince him it wasn't me. She was so embarrassed that if she ever saw him again, or someone pretending to be him, she would turn and run in the other direction.

I shoved the two of them into the dumpster and, shoving his wallet into my back pocket, continued to walk towards the apartment I was renting.

As I put the key into the lock riley flashed into my mind, the way she often does at the most random moments.

I was a prisoner to thoughts and memories of her.

Who am I kidding she never leaves my mind.

I missed her so much. But this was for the best.

As least I could still see her, from a distance anyway.

I smiled knowing I would get to see her again in a few short hours.

She had gotten a new job at a bar that was on the bad end of town. It worried the hell out of me.

I was going to protect her.

that's the only reason.

Yeah just keep telling yourself that McCann.

I knew the truth but there was no way in hell I was going to admit it.

My hands were shaking as I held my guitar and stared out at the forming crowd. The bar was dimly lir bit I could still see the pace of ever person out there.

I gulped loudly.

Jake my boss gripped my elbow

"hey you okay you look a little pale"

I took a deep breath

"yeah im fine"

I shot him a smile and he frowned

"if you say so. You're on In thirty seconds"

Shit.

I looked back out at the huge crowd of people who would be staring me down in about thirty seconds.

There was still time to back out.

I shook my head.

Hell no there was no way I was backing out. I was no chicken.

Jake signaled me and I climbed the three steps onto the stage.

In walked to the middle of the small stage and took a seat on the stool that was there for me.

I took one look out into the crowd and almost fainted.

All the faces. So many expectant faces.

I got up and raced off the stage only to be stopped by jake.

"what's wrong what the hell are you doing"

"I .. Im chickening out that what im doing"

He grabbed my elbow again and dragged me back to the side of the stage.

"oh no you're not you're the only act I have tonight. Close your eyes"

I looked at him like he was crazy

"what?"

"close your damn eyes"

I closed my eyes

"now I want you to forget about the crowd. Forget about the set list. Forget about all the songs you practiced for tonight, the only thing I want you to do is sing from your heart"

He let me go and I opened my eyes

"now get up there and rock it"

He smacked my butt and I yelped before hopping onstage.

I walked to the stool and sat back down nervously clutching my guitar.

I took a deep breath and spoke into the microphone.

"sorry about that im a little nervous."

I gulped and looked down at my guitar

Here goes nothing

"okay well I had a set planned for tonight but I want to do something a little different… have you ever had your heart broken? Have you ever been so in love and then just had your heart ripped out of your chest?"

I saw a few heads in the audience nod and I continued

"well recently ive had my heart ripped out and ripped to shreds. And let me tell you it hurts like hell. So I want to sing this song that I heard the other day. I think a lot of us an really relate to it"

I strummed out the notes on my guitar and started to sing

The crowd disappeared as I sang to someone who wasn't there

So pretty so smart such a waste of a young heart

What a pity what a scam what's the matter with you man?

don't you see whats wrong cant you get it right

Outa mind and outa sight

Call on all your girls don't forget the boys

Put a lid on all that noise

Im a satellite heart lost in the dark

Im spun out so far you stop I start

But ill be true to you

I heard your living out of stare running in a whole new scene

You know I haven't slept in weeks you're the only thing I see

Im a satellite heart lost in the dark

Im spun out so far you stop I start

But ill be true to you

Im a satellite heart lost in the dark

Im spun out so far you stop I start

But ill be true to you

No matter what you do

Yeah ill be true to you

Oh oh oh oh oh ohh ohh

Oh oh oh oh oh ohh ohh

I finished singing and the crowd errupted in applause.

I smiled lightly and did a few more songs.

Once I was done I smiled and thanked them.

I look out over the audience one more time.

Someone in the back caught my eye.

I frowned as I walked off the stage.

No it couldn't be Jason.

I had gotten so caught up in the song, praying that somehow he could hear me and know I was singing to him. Now I was imagining he was here.

I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair.

Jake walked up and patted me on the back

"good job kiddo you can go now ill see you tomorrow."

I nodded and trudged through the bar, grabbing my purse, and walked out the side door into the alley.

I know its dangerous to take the alley but it was the fastest way to get to my car.

I began to walk but I stopped in my tracks when I heard the bar door slam behind me and footsteps.

I grabbed my pocket knife out of my jean pocket an spun around on my heel fully prepared to stab some creepy loser.

When I saw the figure standing behind me in the shadows I gasped and dropped the knife.

He laughed and bend down to pick it up.

He examined th tiny weapon before laughing and handing it back to me

"so much for protecting yourself huh?"

that's when I noticed it wasn't Jason. It was Chris

"I.. um.. Im sorry I just ah"

His eyebrows raised

"you just what thought it was a good idea the go walking through a dark alley after midnight with only a tiny pocket knife to protect you"

I laughed

"yeah I guess so"

He laughed "I guess you enjoy danger then. You know people get killed walking down alley's like this."

I gulped

There was something not right about his eyes.

They looked weird… unnatural

I laughed nervously and reached up to rub the back of my neck

"yeah I think this is the last time ill be doing it"

"good let me walk you to your car"

I nodded and we began walking

"that was a nice song you sung tonight it was almost like you were singing it directly to someone."

I looked down at my feet and he continued

"the words where so sincere saying that you'd remain true to then no matter what. What would make someone want to still love someone who hurt them."

I stopped at the side of my car and looked up at him in the light of the pale yellow street lamp.

"maybe you love this person so much that it doesn't matter what they do you love them and you have to be with them. If someone has your heart there's not a lot you can do about it"

He frowned and reached up to push a piece of hair out of my face

"yeah I know what you mean I guess"

I smiled

"thanks for walking me to my car but I should really get going"

He nodded and stepped back as I got into my car.

I started to close the door but he caught it

"one more thing… how did you know I wasn't going to hurt you myself you're a very pretty girl and there are a lot of monsters out in this area that would love to get there hands on you"

I stared up at him intently

" I don't know about you but I don't believe in monsters just people who make bad decisions."

Me smiled sadly. " ive been told that once before by a girl"

I smiled up at him

"well she's very smart…. But just in case you liked to make bad decisions"

I reached over and pulled the glock out of my dash. The silver metal shown in the moonlight

He laughed. " you even know how to use a gun?"

I frowned up at him

"as a matter a fact I do. If you cant tell from the accent I grew up in south Carolina in the deep south. By the time I was seven I could clean a gun blindfolded and I competed in and won thirteen sharp shooter contests… in the men's division"

He stepped back and held his hands up in surrender laughing lightly

"well alright then. Remind me not to get on your bad side. Goodnight Riley"

I smiled "night Chris"

Jason's POV

Damn fucking hell.

That girl is insane what the hell was she thinking walking down that alley like that.

At least she was prepared… sort of.

And seeing her with that gun, and knowing she knew how to use it, was so fucking hot.

I plopped down on my bed and stared up at the ceiling folding my hands behind my head.

At least my plan had worked. She had thought I was Chris. But something about the way she looked at me was off.

That song she sung was still running through my head set on an endless loop.

"I know exactly how you feel riley. But im sorry we just cant be together….