CHARMED
"Last Dance"
by shel
© january 2004
disclaimer:
the charmed ones, cole, and leo, and the rest of the cast of characters we've come to know and love, belong to spelling television, inc. and possible other copyright holders. i intended no true infringement on their copyrights; i only wanted to borrow these marvelous characters for a short time in my own scenarios and hopefully return them no worse for wear; the only things i've gained from this story are the satisfaction and pleasure of having written it and in knowing that others may have enjoyed it too rating pg-13 summary phoebe and cole say goodbye timeline alternate universe archive please don't without expressed permission warning possible tissue alert notes i'd begun this tale a year ago, right after the episode aired, but never got around to finishing putting it together until i came across it nowplease let me know if you enjoyed my tale and why and, if not, why notand, please, don't bother wasting your time or mine by sending any flames
The silver-haired Avatar found him sitting on the sofa, staring at the framed picture in his hands. "You missed your third orientation," the Avatar softly rebuked.
Surprised, Cole looked up. "I had to finish tying up loose ends. I explained that to --"
"I know," the Avatar interrupted with a nod. "And that you did not want to leave your former firm in the lurch convinces us we made the right choice in choosing you to join us."
"But?" Cole asked, expecting more from the elder. Strange to think that now he had elders of his own to abide by and he bit back a bitter chuckle.
"But it is time to move on. We catered to your whim of creating an alternate reality," the Avatar patiently explained, "and saved you from your grave miscalculation."
"It wasn't right," Cole whispered. "Nothing was what I meant it to be."
"You learned an important lesson," the Avatar said, "of the dangers in manipulating time and space. If we had not pulled you out as we did, you would, in fact, be dead. But, we did and reality was restored. Your former sister-in-law undoubtedly informed her sisters of her experience and, now, they are the only ones who believe you dead. Excepting, of course, anyone they should tell."
"They won't," Cole reasoned, "because they'd have no one to tell. Perhaps Morris but who would he tell? It's not as though Phoebe would go to my firm and tell them I was dead or missing. She went through the abandoned wife routine once before and I highly doubt she'd care to do it againShe said we weren't meant to be."
"It wasn't her," the Avatar reminded him, "but a warped version of her."
Cole sadly shook his head. "There was enough of the true reality within her." He looked to his companion, "So why can't I believe it? Why do I still want to prove her wrong?"
The Avatar shrugged. "I have no answer for you. Perhaps in time, you will discover a reasoning that will bring you comfort. But, for now, you must realize that you have entered a new phase of existence, Cole. You can no longer concern yourself with the mundane daily aspects of life."
"It's not as easy as I thought it would be," Cole quietly responded as he gazed at the picture of himself and Phoebe.
"You will learn," the Avatar kindly said. "There is so much for you to learn," he added with a hint of excitement. "So many new possibilities await you. Come."
Cole slowly put the picture frame down on the table and stood. He took a step towards the Avatar and looked around the penthouse once more. Images of his brief time with Phoebe in this place flooded his mind and he wondered for a moment whether she would ever return here. Would she wish to keep any of these precious mementos? Would they still hold any meaning for her? He was tempted to throw everything into a box and bury it somewhere to keep them safe. But he caught the sympathetic expression of the Avatar and resigned himself to letting go of the past. Instead, in a low tone, he announced, "I'm ready." But, just as he took another step towards the Avatar, he stopped. "What's that?"
"I hear nothing," the Avatar lied. Discovering the source would only cause Cole further confusion. "Let us depart now. You must make up the orientations you missed and we have a long journey ahead."
"No," Cole insisted as he turned to the bedroom. "It's coming from in there."
"Cole" the Avatar warned.
But Cole ignored him and opened the bedroom door. "Phoebe!" he exclaimed. She lay curled on the floor, sobbing into one of his shirts. When she didn't respond to his entry, he rushed to her side and, unable to help himself, knelt next to her, and pulled her into his arms. She continued to sob, seemingly unaware of his presence, and he looked to the Avatar.
"You must leave her," the Avatar advised. "Let her grieve. It is what you wanted, is it not?"
Cole gazed down at the woman he still loved and whispered, "Not like this." He looked back to his mentor and, in a determined tone, stated, "I won't leave her."
"You have no choice," the Avatar demanded. Unfortunately, Cole glared back at him with growing anger. Reluctantly, he decided to give Cole one last chance to settle matters of the former demon's life. "I will return," he cautioned Cole, "in what will seem to you an unfairly brief moment of time. But it will be all you can receive. Use the time wisely and, remember, you cannot tell her the truth of what you have now become."
Cole nodded absent-mindedly and didn't see the Avatar leave. All he could focus on was the petite woman sobbing uncontrollably in his arms.
*********** *********** ***********
"Oh, Cole," Phoebe cried, "how did it come to this?"
Cole continued to gently rock her and stroked her hair. "I don't know," he softly admitted. "I think I got lost and things simply happened. I never meant to hurt you, Phoebe, I swear it."
She twisted his shirt in her hands, clenched it tightly, and squeezed her eyes shut as the pain threatened to overwhelm her. "I said I didn't care. I believed it. I needed to. But you're gone now and I can'tI can't"
"Hush," he murmured when she broke off in fresh sobs, "it's okay, Phoebe. You were hurt terribly and I understand how you felt. I understand so much better now."
"How can you," she cried, "when I don't understand myself!" She suddenly pushed herself out of his embrace and shouted, "How could you do this to me? To us?" She pounded his chest in anger until something clicked within her mind and she froze, "Cole?"
"It's me," he admitted. "I --"
"I don't understand," she interrupted while she stared at him in shock. "How's this possible? Paige said you were dead."
Cole steadied her when she began to tremble and, recalling the Avatar's warning, he smiled sadly and lied, "I am, Phoebe. This is only a dream."
Phoebe couldn't stop her tears and threw herself into his arms, "I didn't expect it to hurt so much."
"Neither did I," he agreed while he continued to comfort her. "What're you doing here?" he quietly asked after her sobs had lessened in intensity.
Still sitting somewhat on his lap, she sniffled and pulled back. He brushed her hair behind her ears and she sniffled again before she spoke in a hoarse voice. "Paige told us what happened in that other reality and, that night, we came here to seeto see if"
"If I was really gone?" he finished for her. She nodded and hugged the shirt to her chest. "Go on," he encouraged as she covered her mouth with a shirt-covered fist. "You and your sisters came here and"
"And it was empty," she whispered into the shirt.
He gently pried her hand from mouth and held it tightly in his. He met her gaze and patiently waited for her to continue.
"All your things were still here," she finally said, "but it felt empty and I knew Paige I was right. I knew you were gone for good." She hesitantly traced his chin with a trembling finger before she looked away in shame, "And I was relieved. I was relieved the madness was finally over."
He brought her finger to his lips and kissed it lightly. "It's okay," he assured her, "it was madness. I hadn't been thinking clearly for weeks."
Phoebe leaned into him and continued, "But I couldn't stop thinking about it, about you. I don't know how I got through work the next day. And that night, last night, I came back here."
"Why?" he questioned as he wrapped his arms around her.
She shrugged, "Everything was the same and Iit started to sink in, really sink in, that everything Paige told us was true."
"You'd hoped it wasn't?" he asked in surprise.
Again, Phoebe shrugged, "Stupid, huh"
"Not really," he softly told her, "because, deep down, you did still care. You still --"
"Loved," she whispered in acknowledgement, "you."
"Come," Cole abruptly said as he gently pushed her off his lap. Together, they stood and he ignored her confusion as he led her onto the terrace. "I don't have much time and --"
"No," she softly interrupted as tears threatened to flow again, "not yet."
"Dance with me," he requested in a choked voice. "Please."
"There's no music," she sniffled.
He smiled at her and brushed away her tears, "When did that ever stop us?" He held out his hand to her and, when she accepted it, he pulled her close. He closed his eyes and savored every nuance of having her in his arms. He smiled when she seemed to press herself closer but, when he opened his eyes, he saw the Avatar waiting by the French doors, and he froze.
"Cole?" Phoebe glanced up in surprise when he stopped moving. "What is it? What's wrong?"
"I have to go now," he sadly told her.
"No," she shook her head. "I'm not ready yet. There's so much I want to say, that I have to say."
Cole caressed her cheek, "I know, Phoebe. I've always known."
He started to walk away but she grabbed his arm. "No," she angrily insisted, "this is my dream and I'm telling you it's not over yet." She pulled him into a passionate kiss and then breathlessly repeated, "It's not over yet."
The Avatar was stirred by the scene and by Cole's silent pleading and nodded his consent before he vanished.
Cole lifted her into his arms and, while she kept kissing him, carried her back into the bedroom where he gently placed her on the soft covers.
*********** *********** ***********
Phoebe rested her head on his chest and sighed contentedly while he lazily ran his fingers up and down her bare back. "This's what I always hoped it would be like."
He hadn't felt such a feeling of serenity or completion in what seemed like ages. "Me too," he quietly agreed.
"Happy birthday, Cole," she murmured while she placed a light kiss on his chest. She felt his sudden tension and propped herself up on her elbow. "Belatedly, of course." He still looked disturbed and she suddenly realized what had actually happened on that day. "Guess it wasn't so happy," she apologized as she turned over, away from him. "I didn't mean --"
He interrupted her with a tender kiss to the back of her head and assured her, "I got my wish. A chance to be with you again." Phoebe began to cry and he pulled her close and wrapped his arm around her waist. "You will always be with me."
"You'll always be with me," she whispered in return.
"And I will always watch over you," he promised. "And if you ever need me, I will be there to protect you."
"You have to go now, don't you?" she said before she pulled his arm tighter around her in an effort to keep him in bed next to her.
He kissed the back of her head and silently slid out from behind her. He sat up and reached for his shirt.
Phoebe quickly sat up and stopped him from putting it on. "Let me," she offered with tears in her eyes.
He surrendered and allowed her to dress him in between tender kisses. And, when she was done, he did the same for her. He gazed at her for a moment before he stood, pulled her up, and danced slowly with her for a moment. He kissed the top of her head, pulled away, and turned to leave.
Phoebe hugged herself and sank back onto the mattress. "I'm sorry," she cried as she looked down, "I never wanted it to end like this. I never wanted to hurt you."
Cole quickly knelt before her and took her hands in his. "There are many things I've done, Phoebe, that I will regret for eternity. But," he tilted her chin up so she would look at him, "loving you will never be one of them. Phoebe Halliwell, you turned my life upside-down with a simple raise of your arm. You brought me to life and I will, forever, be in your debt." He brought her hands to his lips and kissed each before he released them into her lap. He quickly stood and, resisting the urge to take her in his arms, he left the room.
Phoebe rushed after him. "I love you," she shouted from the doorway.
Cole stopped in mid-stride and spun to face her.
"I love you," she cried again even as Cole rushed back to her and pulled her into his arms. She threw her arms around him and continued, "I've always loved you. Even in the worst of everything, when I couldn't even admit it to myself, I loved you. And I always will."
"And I you," he promised in a choked voice. He embraced her tightly and whispered, "Be happy, Phoebe, and have that life you deserve."
"One day, Cole Turner," she whispered fiercely in his ear, "we will have eternity."
He kissed her passionately one last time and then traced her slightly puffy lips with his index finger. "Eternity," he promised with unshed tears in his eyes, "will never be enough for us."
Phoebe couldn't speak as the tears streamed down her cheeks. She reached out to him but he stepped back and she could only bring herself to mouth the words, I love you.'
Cole did the same and burned the image of her into his memory before he disappeared from the room.
*********** *********** ***********
Phoebe had sealed the carton when she heard her sister's call. "I'm in here, Piper."
Piper entered the bedroom and hesitantly asked, "What're you doing here, Pheebs? Are you okay?"
Phoebe picked up the shirt that she had found earlier and hugged it. "I will be," she told her sister. "Cole and I talked and" she caught her sister's horrified look and quickly assured Piper, "It was only a dream. I was a wreck after I got here and I guess I fell asleep."
"It's not surprising," Piper sympathetically said, "considering everything you've been through the last few days."
Phoebe nodded and added, "Even if it was a dream, I was able to say things I couldn't say before." She touched her lips and whispered, "It was everything I could've hoped for and more." She suddenly cleared her throat and informed Piper, "Those piles and boxes are for charity. Cole won't be needing any of this stuff and it'd be a shame to let it go to waste."
"That's a great idea," Piper nodded encouragingly. She pointed to two boxes separate from the rest, "What about those?"
Phoebe glanced at them before she turned back to her sister with tears in her eyes, "They're filled with memories, not just his, and I can'tI'm not ready to"
Piper quickly hugged her younger sister, "It's okay, Pheebs, it's okay."
"Do you think I'll ever see him again?" Phoebe asked with a sniffle.
Piper pulled back enough to touch foreheads with Phoebe. "The way fate toys with us," she quietly said, "I wouldn't be surprised if you did."
"I love you, Piper," Phoebe whispered when she hugged her sister again.
"Love you more," Piper replied before she stepped back and lifted one of the two boxes. "Let's go home," she said as her sister stuffed the shirt into the second box and lifted it. "We'll take care of the rest of this tomorrow."
Phoebe lingered a moment alone in the room and, facing the bed, softly murmured, "I'll always love you, Cole." And, for a split second, she would've sworn she'd heard him reply in kind. With a sad smile, she added, "Goodbye for now." She turned out the light, gazed once more at the bed, and joined her sister by the elevator.
"Goodbye," Cole's voice echoed in the empty room, "until I see you again."
the end