A/N This is my first shot at writing something first person and it's more of an experimental story rather than the story I wanted to do. So bare with me!
Can diaries even have a prologue?
This story is complicated. It's probably one of those stories that you either love, or you don't really get until it's over and it's a waste of time. But there is one thing you should know about this story before you begin. Before you even start to begin. This story is true. This story is probably believable, I'm not sure yet, but ultimately this story is mine.
I have two sisters and if you're reading this you probably already know them. One of them is kind of famous for one reason or another, her boyfriend hates it but puts up with it, but she is recognised. My eldest sister is beautiful and talented but wouldn't want anybody to actually know about it in case they got their feelings hurt. So she sticks under the radar, with her ultimate soon to be fiance which if my mother talks about it one more time at the dinner table I will probably scream.
No, Lizzie might have been exaggerating with a few things, but my mother was one thing she was almost subtle about. And because I am the only one left, it's up to me to try and calm her down and I have enough of my own things to deal with than my mother obsessively trying to marry me off or encourage me to be more like Lizzie. Because out of all of us, my sister was the one that took the cake.
Her own business. Her stupidly rich mancake boyfriend that adores her. Oh yes, for all of Lizzie's complaints in life, she certainly won the lottery when it came to the future. And me, I don't even know any more about what I want to do or where I want to go.
I'm sure this is just bringing you into my story isn't it? Read about the forgotten younger sister as she complains about her own life, when if anybody has watched the videos would probably know, that my actions almost screwed everything up. I took her away from Pemberley just as she was about to get her boyfriend. And I was the one that dragged her home instead of to the threatre.
So before I get any further, can I just say one thing? I'm sorry about all of that. But I really didn't mean any of it.
To update you on life though, Lizzie is currently in San Fran with her boyfriend, Jane is still in New York and is buried under fabric samples and me, well I'm still at home. Mary and I are close friends and still cousins, but Mary is about to move on with her life as well. Kitty spends most of her time sleeping and I spend most of my time in classes.
Okay I should. But for all Darcy's good intentions, my story still kind of got out. Doesn't help when things are on youtube. But, and I take a deep breath here, my story isn't just about telling you what happened with everybody else, this is my story.
I am Lydia Bennet. I have red hair. I am studying nothing in particular. I have no career aspirations and no direction in life.
Six months ago my boyfriend posted a video of me and him having sex for sale up on the internet, if it wasn't for my sister's boyfriend I would currently get to list porn star in that list above. I haven't heard from him since. And it took me awhile to realise what everybody else has been trying to tell me for a long time.
He isn't coming back.
I don't know what Darceface did or didn't do. But my texts go unanswered and my emails get bounced back. I tried calling him once, just to hear his voice on the voice mail, but the number was disconnected.
I still text it occasionally, I don't even know why. But for some reason I can tell the cyberspace deadzone of unanswered text messages more than I can tell anybody else. Particularly now. Particularly when I'm alone.