Hi guys. I wrote this story a few years ago and published it on here but ended up deleting it. I felt like the fandom had gotten a bit toxic towards the end with too much negativity and I didn't enjoy writing fanfiction anymore. However, I recently stumbled across my old works and now that things have calmed down I've decided to reupload this one. I will probably be changing some bits that I don't like. Enjoy!
Beautiful Scars
Summary: Brittany is a shy 24 year old waitress. A serious accident left part of her body covered in burn scars. She hasn't been with anyone ever since, what happens when she meets a beautiful brunette at work? AU.
Chapter 1.
Brittany woke up with a gasp, covered in a cold sweat. She sat upright and tried to get her breathing down to a normal level. The nightmare was still fresh in her mind and her hands unconsciously traveled to her stomach, rubbing the scars that marked the skin. She clenched her eyes shut, trying to block out the memories. The flames, the blood but most of all the screams.
Once her heart-rate had finally slowed down, she threw the covers off herself and climbed out of bed. Her bare feet padded against the floor as she made her way into the bathroom. She hurriedly undressed herself and turned away from the mirror to avoid seeing the reflection of her naked body. She stepped into the shower and turned on the water. Relaxation immediately took over, allowing her mind to go blank.
She quickly changed into her work clothes and rushed around her apartment to gather her things. She was already running late so she decided to skip breakfast, knowing she would regret it later during the day.
The streets of the early morning were quiet as Brittany made her way towards the bus stop. She pulled her coat closer around her body to shield herself from the cold wind.
The bus screeched to a halt and Brittany hurriedly climbed aboard. She took a seat in the back and glanced at her watch. She was definitely late and her boss would not appreciate it. Having a job as a waitress wasn't ideal, she had to work long shifts and the payment was minimal. It was barely enough to keep a roof over her head. That was also the reason why she used public transportation: she couldn't afford a car right now.
When she arrived at Joey's, she was instantly greeted by her co-worker and best friend Tina. The girl appeared to be shy but was actually very outgoing and fun once you got to know her. Her expression at the moment was anything but happy though. ''Britt, you're late. Hurry up.''
Brittany placed her bag behind the counter and shot her an apologetic smile. ''I'm sorry.''
Tina's eyes softened and she tilted her head, as if she was trying to find the right words. ''It's okay. Did you have another nightmare?''
Brittany simply nodded and tied an apron around her waist. Only a few people knew about the things that haunted her at night and she planned on keeping it that way. The concerned expression on her best friend's face unsettled her and she quickly averted her gaze elsewhere.
She clocked herself in and grabbed a notepad off the counter. She moved mechanically through the first part of the day, taking orders from rude customers and cleaning the mess they left behind. When it was finally time for her lunch break, her stomach was rumbling painfully. She normally tried to stay away from the junk food that was sold at Joey's but she didn't have much choice now that she hadn't brought anything from home.
Tina was already sitting at a table in the back of the diner and she looked up when Brittany joined her. Brittany shot her a smile. ''How was your date?''
Tina had been crushing on a guy named Mike for months now and he finally asked her out last week. Brittany hadn't been on a date in forever but her jealousy disappeared as quickly as it came when she saw the happiness in her best friend's eyes. ''It was amazing. He brought me to this fancy restaurant and the whole evening was like a dream.''
She threw her head back to emphasize her words and Brittany couldn't help but smile. ''He sounds like a keeper.''
Tina nodded her head enthusiastically and continued to inform her on every detail of the date.
Lunch break ended way too quickly and before Brittany knew it, she was on her feet again.
The diner was overloaded with customers and she quickly rushed to a table that hadn't ordered yet. She flashed them a bright smile. ''Hi, can I take your order?''
A young woman with blonde hair and hazel-green eyes looked up from her menu and returned the smile. ''Yeah I'd like to have the chicken parmesan please.''
Brittany nodded and wrote it down in her usual sloppy handwriting. Her eyes then landed on the brunette that was busy typing away on her phone. The blonde one slapped her arm to get her attention. ''S!''
The brunette, whose name apparently started with an S, finally looked up and Brittany's eyes met a deep shade of brown. Her breath caught in her throat and for a moment everything went silent around her. The girl was beyond beautiful, there was no doubt about that.
She was snapped back to reality when the brunette arched an eyebrow at her. Brittany realized that she had missed her order and her cheeks tinted red in embarrassment. ''I'm sorry?''
Her voice came out unusually high-pitched and her cheeks became even redder than before.
The brunette gave her a lopsided grin. ''I'll have the same.''
Brittany shot them a small smile and decided to remain silent, not trusting her voice. She dropped the orders off in the kitchen and helped another customer. Her feet hurt and she was beyond exhausted but she wasn't even halfway through her shift yet. She couldn't remember the last time she had a good night rest and it was beginning to wear her down.
She could feel someone's eyes on her and she turned around to see the brunette from before smiling at her. Brittany blushed a little, for some reason she felt the need to talk to her but she decided against it.
Brittany continued to help customers as the time dragged on agonizingly slow. The table that was previously occupied by the two girls was now empty and she couldn't deny the disappointment that coursed through her veins.
Her shift came to an end eventually and she barely managed to keep her eyes open on the bus ride home. She rested her head against the cool glass of the window, watching the cars that passed by.
When Brittany arrived at her apartment, she threw her bag on the couch and made a beeline to her bedroom. She changed out of her work clothes and sat down on the edge of her bed. She sighed as she examined the scars, an uneasy feeling settling in her chest.
She opened a drawer of the bedside table and grabbed the tube of ointment. She squeezed some of the minty smelling cream onto her fingers and started to rub it across her ribcage, on her flat stomach, across her lower back, over her hips and on her upper legs. She hated the sight of the scars but the cream made the tissue less sensitive.
Exhaustion began to overwhelm her and she pushed herself off the bed to put on some sleeping clothes. She walked into the bathroom and brushed her teeth, looking at her appearance in the mirror. There were dark circles under her dull blue eyes and her skin was even paler than usual. Brittany blinked a few times but nothing changed.
She crawled into bed and pulled the covers over her body. Luckily she had a late shift tomorrow so she could sleep in. She closed her eyes and could only hope for a night without nightmares.
Santana stared at the blank page of her laptop. She knew exactly what she wanted to write, she just couldn't decide on how to write it. It was almost midnight and she had to submit an article on American pop culture to Schuester's Magazine in less than a week. Her fingers hovered over the keyboard before she sighed in defeat.
''Fuck this.'' She muttered, grabbing her coat off the back of her chair. Fresh air was the best way to cure writer's block.
She left her apartment and began to make her way down the dark streets. It was cold outside and Santana's breath left her mouth in small, white puffs. She shoved her hands into her pockets and dropped her gaze to the dark concrete beneath her feet. Her mind was still completely blank and frustration was beginning to build up inside of her.
Her eyes landed on an illuminated sign in pink and blue that read: Joey's. Santana remembered having lunch there with her best friend Quinn a few days ago. She licked her lips at the thought of a fresh cup of coffee and hurriedly crossed the street.
The diner was quiet with only a few people gathered at the tables. Santana slid onto a stool at the counter and the waitress that was standing behind it looked up. Bright blue eyes met warm brown ones and Santana finally remembered why she had enjoyed eating at this diner so much. It was because of the gorgeous girl that worked there.
She gave the blonde a small smile. ''Can I have a cup of coffee please?''
The waitress blinked a few times and then nodded her head. She returned with a pot of coffee less than a minute later and leaned over the counter to pour Santana a cup. ''There you go.''
Her voice was soft, almost angelic and Santana was determined to hear more of it. She tried to think of a way to start a conversation but couldn't come up with anything. She raised the cup of coffee to her lips, blowing on the hot liquid before carefully taking a sip. Her eyes followed the blonde who was cleaning some glasses. Her features were relaxed but Santana hadn't missed the hint of sadness in her eyes earlier.
Santana had almost finished her cup of coffee when the waitress finally looked up. Her eyes scanned the diner before they finally landed on Santana. Her eyebrows pinched together and Santana hoped that she was going to say something. A few seconds of silence passed before her wish came true. ''So what brings you here this late at night?''
Her voice was unsure, as if she was afraid of crossing a line by asking the question.
Santana shot her a reassuring smile. ''I'm trying to find some inspiration for work.''
The waitress nodded and stuffed the dish towel that she had been using in the pocket of her apron. ''What do you do?''
Santana was happy that the conversation wasn't over yet. ''I write articles for Schuester's magazine.''
A small smile formed on the blonde's lips. ''So you're into music?''
''I sure am.'' Santana replied enthusiastically. She wanted to ask for the blonde's name but she didn't know if she could. She settled for the following instead. ''Are you?'' The girl's face scrunched up in confusion and it was the most adorable thing Santana had ever seen. She chuckled and added, ''Into music.''
Realization washed over the blonde's features. She shrugged. ''I guess. I used to dance.''
The hint of sadness in her eyes was now also evident in her voice. It became clear to Santana that this subject was off limits. She wanted to take another sip of her coffee but realized that her cup was empty. The waitress gestured towards the pot and Santana nodded gratefully. The waitress gave her a small smile and refilled her cup. ''Thanks.''
The blonde nodded and unsuccessfully tried to stifle a yawn. Santana smiled. ''How late does your shift end?'' As soon as the words left her mouth, she realized what an odd question it was. ''Not that it's any of my business. I mean, you look tired and...''
She trailed off before she could humiliate herself any further. The blonde smiled a smile that actually reached her eyes this time. ''It's okay. I get off at two.''
''Do you often work late shifts?'' Santana asked, subtly trying to get an idea of her schedule.
''Only on Mondays and Thursdays.''
Santana nodded. ''There must be a lot of weird people around at this time.''
''Kind of. I'm talking to one right now.'' The waitress replied with a smirk.
Santana put her hand over her heart, feigning heartbreak. ''I'm not weird.'' For the first time that night, the other woman laughed and Santana was certain that it was the most beautiful sound in the world. She decided to test her luck. ''What's your name?''
The blonde tilted her head and studied Santana's face for a few seconds. She seemed so guarded and for some reason Santana felt the need to break through those walls. After what seemed like forever, she finally received an answer. ''It's Brittany.''
Santana couldn't help but smile, the name fit her. ''I'm Santana, it's nice to meet you.''
It was finally Sunday which meant that it was Brittany's day off. She dragged herself out of bed and walked into the bathroom to take a quick shower. She was so tired, it felt like she was just going through the motions without feeling anything. It had been that way for two years and she didn't think it was ever going to change.
She got dressed, she ate breakfast and went to the store to do some grocery shopping. All on autopilot. Her gaze remained lowered, avoiding eye contact at all costs. She knew that her clothing covered her scars but sometimes it felt like there was a big neon sign over her head that read "broken". Brittany kept to herself for the most part, there were only two people in her life that she considered her real friends.
One of them was Tina and the other one came barging into her apartment later that night. Brittany was just lounging on the couch, reading a book when Noah Puckerman disturbed her quiet. She'd been friends with him since high school and he was like a brother to her.
While all her other friends had disappeared from her life after the accident, Noah had always been there for her and their bond had only become stronger.
''I brought you some food.'' Noah said, dropping a bag of what appeared to be Chinese take-out on the table. He took off his jacket and plopped down on the couch next to Brittany.
''Thanks but I'm not really hungry.'' Brittany mumbled. She closed her book and put it down before drawing her knees to her chest and wrapping her arms around them protectively.
Noah sighed sadly. ''You have to eat something, Britt. You're getting way too skinny.''
While Noah claimed to be 'a badass ladies' man', he was actually really kind and caring. He had grown up a lot since high school, he had gotten rid of the nickname 'Puck' and made a decent living as a prison guard. Brittany hated the concerned look in his eyes so she stood up and grabbed two plates from the kitchen. She handed one to Noah and returned to her spot on the couch. Her friend seemed satisfied and immediately began to eat.
''So how are you?'' Noah asked after a while. ''Be honest with me.''
''I'm fine.'' Brittany replied, setting her plate down on the table. ''I've been really busy with work.''
''You know that's not what I meant.'' His voice was stern but gentle. He scooted closer until their shoulders were touching. Brittany knew that this was his way of showing that he was there for her. ''Are you still having nightmares?''
Brittany knew that there was no point in lying because he would see right through her. She dropped her gaze to her lap and slowly nodded her head. Noah set down his plate as well and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. ''Don't take this the wrong way but maybe it's time to seek professional help.''
Brittany's head shot up at this and she shrugged off his hand. ''I don't need a shrink, Noah. I'm fine.''
Her voice came out a little harsher than intended and Noah raised his hands in defense. ''Okay, I'm sorry.''
An awkward silence settled over the room and Brittany immediately felt guilty for snapping at her friend. She knew that he was just trying to help. She opened her mouth to apologize when Noah's ringtone sounded. He shot her a small smile and took his phone out of his pocket to answer it.
Brittany took this as her cue to stand up. She brought the plates to the kitchen and washed them off. She returned to her spot on the couch just as Noah finished his call. He turned to face her. ''We're going out for drinks with Sam and Mercedes. They're picking us up in half an hour.''
Sam worked with Noah and Mercedes was his girlfriend. Brittany had seen the couple a few times but she wouldn't consider them her friends. She sighed. ''I'm not really in the mood for drinks.''
Noah didn't seem surprised by her words. He'd been trying to convince her to go out for drinks for two years now and her answer was always the same. ''Come on Britt, you can't lock yourself up in your apartment forever. I know that you work late shifts on Mondays.''
Brittany raised her hands to briefly massage her temples. She knew that he was right but her fears dominated her mind. Noah seemed aware of her inner conflict because he sent her a reassuring smile. ''It'll be fun. I promise.''
Brittany studied his face for a few seconds and then finally gave in. ''I don't know what to wear.''
Her friend smiled like he had just won the lottery. He stood up from the couch and gestured for her to follow. He led her into the bedroom and started to rummage through her closet.
Brittany sat down on the bed and just watched him. ''You're not seriously giving me fashion advice, are you?''
''Just trust me.'' Noah said, glancing over his shoulder. Brittany sighed and waited patiently until he finally found what he was looking for. He handed her a black knee-length dress and a pair of heels. ''I'll wait for you outside.''
Brittany nodded and took the items from him. Noah smiled and disappeared from the room. Once she had changed, she finished her outfit with some accessories and walked into the bathroom to curl her hair. She gave herself a once over in the mirror and took a deep breath before re-entering the living room.
Noah was sitting on the couch and he looked up when Brittany walked in. A huge smile formed on his face. ''You look amazing.''
Brittany nervously bit her lip and looked down at herself. ''Can you see anything?''
Noah's eyes turned sympathetic and he got to his feet. He placed a hand on Brittany's shoulder and spoke in a gentle voice. ''You look beautiful, just trust me for once. The girls will be fighting over you.'' Brittany's lips twitched into a small smile and Noah recognized that look. He smirked. ''You met someone, didn't you?''
Brittany's thoughts wandered to Santana. The brunette had stopped by the diner almost every day this week. She was funny and it was easy to talk to her. Brittany felt comfortable around her. She looked at Noah who was still waiting for an answer. ''Maybe.''
He grinned. ''Tell me everything! I'm still your bestie.''
''Shut up, Puckerman.'' Brittany lightly slapped his arm. ''Her name is Santana. I met her at work.''
''Is she hot?''
''That word doesn't do her justice.'' Brittany replied, giving him a disapproving look. ''She's absolutely gorgeous.''
''You've got it bad!'' Noah laughed, earning a glare from Brittany. ''Why don't you ask her out on a date?''
Brittany averted her gaze to the floor, the familiar uneasy feeling twisting her stomach.
''Someone as beautiful as her would never be interested in me.'' She lifted her head to meet Noah's sad eyes. He opened his mouth to protest but Brittany didn't give him the chance. ''Let's go before I change my mind.''
Noah sighed but didn't say anything. He put on his jacket and linked their arms together as they left the apartment. Sam's car was already parked outside and they climbed in the backseat. They all greeted each other before Sam started the engine and pulled out of the parking space.
''I'm so glad that you decided to join us!'' Mercedes told Brittany. She was wearing a beautiful red dress and her hair fell over her shoulders in waves. Brittany had always been jealous of how confident she was. ''We haven't seen you in forever.''
''We hear plenty of things about you from Noah though.'' Sam said, looking at her in the rearview mirror.
Brittany arched an eyebrow at Noah, silently asking for an explanation. He laughed. ''What? You're practically my little sister.''
Brittany rolled her eyes and gave him a small smile. She focused her attention on Mercedes again. ''How's your album getting along?''
Mercedes was an amazing singer and had recently signed a record deal with a small label. ''Things are going great. We've just finished writing all the songs so we'll probably start with the recording process soon.''
''That's awesome.'' Brittany replied genuinely. ''I can't wait to hear the result.''
''You won't be disappointed.'' Sam said from the driver's seat. He shot his girlfriend a proud smile and Brittany couldn't help but be a little jealous of their connection. They were obviously very in love and it reminded Brittany of how lonely her own life was. She sighed and rested her forehead against the car window.
When they arrived at Mojo's it was very busy but they were allowed to cut the line because Noah apparently knew the owner. Brittany had to admit that it was a little unfair but she didn't mind. The bouncer let them through and they walked into the club.
They ordered some drinks and a guy in a black suit guided them to the private booth Noah had managed to get them. They slid into a seat and Brittany took a moment to scan her surroundings. The dance floor was packed with people moving to the music and a familiar urge bubbled up inside of Brittany. She quickly tore her eyes away and focused them on Sam who was telling a story.
After they had finished their first drink, Noah leaned in to speak in Brittany's ear. ''Come dance with me.'' Brittany went to shake her head but he continued. ''Just allow yourself to have fun for once.''
Brittany pulled back a little to look at him. Panic built up inside of her and she nervously began to fiddle with her bracelet. ''I'm not sure.''
''Please, for me.'' He clasped his hands together and put on the biggest puppy dog eyes.
Brittany sighed and gave him a small nod in response. He grinned and took her hand to lead her onto the dance floor.
Brittany swallowed thickly and tried to push the negative thoughts in her mind away. Her steps were hesitant at first but they grew more confident as she allowed the music to carry her away. There was suddenly a tap on Brittany's shoulder and she turned around to face an attractive redhead. The girl started to grind against her and Brittany stood frozen for a few seconds before she copied the movements. She threw a quick glance at Noah and saw that he was dancing with two girls at the same time. She shook her head in amusement and focused her attention on the redhead again.
The girl encircled Brittany's neck with her arms, pulling their bodies closer together. Brittany shook off the uncomfortable feeling that she got and repeated Noah's words in her head, just allow yourself to have fun for once.
The girl suddenly pressed her lips against Brittany's, taking her by surprise. It took a few seconds before she started to kiss back, slightly parting her lips to grant the girl access. She tried to relax but everything about this felt wrong. The girl, the dancing…
The kiss quickly became heated and Brittany was snapped back to reality when the girl's hands began to wander up and down her sides. She broke the kiss and pulled away. The girl looked at her with a confused expression but Brittany just shook her head and went to find Noah.
She tapped his shoulder to get his attention and leaned in to speak in his ear. ''I'm going home.''
His eyes filled with concern and he placed a hand on her lower back to guide her towards a quiet corner of the club. ''Are you okay?''
''I can't do this, Noah.'' Brittany replied, her throat constricting. ''I just can't.''
''Brittany.'' Noah said gently. ''I know that it's hard but you've got to pick up your life at some point.''
Brittany lowered her head in embarrassment and blinked away the tears that were burning behind her eyes.
''I know but I'm just not ready yet.'' She slowly lifted her head to meet Noah's eyes. ''Can you tell Sam and Mercedes that I'm sorry? I really am.''
Her bottom lip quivered as she tried to keep her tears at bay. Noah frowned, his eyes holding nothing but sadness. ''It's okay, Britt. I know that you are. Do you want me to take you home?''
Brittany shook her head. ''I'll take a cab.'' She pinched the bridge of her nose, frustrated with herself. ''I'm really sorry.''
''Stop apologizing. It's fine. You tried and I'm proud of you for that.'' Noah told her. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into a tight hug. Brittany buried her face in his shoulder, she always felt safe in his embrace. ''Be careful, okay?''
They pulled back and Brittany nodded. ''I will. Enjoy the rest of your night.'' She shot him a small smile and started to make her way through the crowd.
When she got outside, she waved over a cab and gave the driver her address. The man gave her a curious look, one that had probably something to do with the tears that were now streaming down her face. She ignored him and leaned back in her seat. She was beyond frustrated with herself, it felt like she would never be able to overcome her fears, no matter how hard she tried. How could anyone ever love her if she couldn't even look at her own body without wanting to curl up into a corner and hide from the world?