Disclaimer: Don't own nothin' – but I've now seen "Casino Royale" twice, and I absolutely love it!!!
I do wish I could control my muse a little better. I have another story that I have to finish, but it seems like I can't get James Bond out of my head! This story is similar to my other Bond fic, "February Song," but this one is told more from Vesper's point of view. The lyrics are from "My Last Breath" by Evanescence.
Enjoy! And review, if you're feeling brave…
Hold on to me love
You know I can't stay long
All I wanted to say was I love you and I'm not afraid
Can you hear me?
Can you feel me in your arms?
Vesper stumbled into their shared hotel room. She didn't remember finding Mathis – couldn't think what she'd said to him. But she could still see his concerned look as he told her to get some rest. She clutched at the door, her weight causing it to slam behind her. The horror of the stairwell fight rose again, and Vesper could feel bile rise in her throat. It was difficult to breathe. She tripped as one of her high heels caught the hem of her dress, and found herself unceremoniously on the floor.
Breathe, she ordered herself as the world tilted crazily around her. Her hands clawed to undo the straps of her shoes, and she was soon able stand; though she leaned heavily on a small table near the sofa. On it she noticed a bottle of red wine. Next to it sat two glasses and a note saying it was compliments of the management.
After some struggling, Vesper was able to open it, and started to pour a generous amount into one of the waiting goblets. Her hand was shaking so badly that she found it hard to steady the bottle, and soon sent a stream of wine down her arm where it splashed on the table. The puddle of dark red liquid began to grow as she realized she had dropped and shattered her glass. The bottle also fell from her hand as she stared in shock. It was as if a pool of blood was deepening around her feet. The sticky wine dripped from her fingers as she ran to the bathroom.
She vomited into the toilet and fell to her knees as sobs racked through her body. All Vesper could do was stare at her stained hands in shock and panic. She may have saved Bond's life, but she had also helped him kill that man. It was his blood that was on her hands.
Vesper crawled into the shower, turning on the water. She hugged her knees to her chest and waited for the world to end. She didn't see James come in – didn't know how long she had been there. The only thing she noticed was his strong form next to her, and she immediately huddled up next to him. Her shivering seemed to abate as he gently licked the invisible blood from her fingers – taking into himself all the blame and responsibility for the man's death. When he reached up to turn on the hot water, Vesper nestled herself deeper into his embrace and took a deep shuddering breath.
Holding my last breath
Safe inside myself
Are all my thoughts of you
Sweet raptured light
It ends here tonight
She had never been so scared. The two men in the back of the car bound and gagged her as she struggled. Vesper prayed that James would find her, even as the panic began to take over again. She had no idea where they were going, and was shocked when – after rounding a corner, she was pulled from the car and left in the open road. Before she could think what they meant to accomplish by abandoning her here, Vesper was blinded by the headlights of an oncoming car. They were going far too fast – there would be no way for them to stop in time. For the second time in as many days, Vesper curled her legs up into her chest and waited for the inevitable.
She soon found herself thrown back into the rear of the black car. Just as she started to relax into the knowledge that she was still alive, the opposite door opened, and Vesper started as James – unconscious and matted in his own blood – was tossed in next to her.
Even as all thoughts of hope faded, Vesper could not imagine the hell that still waited for them both…
I'll miss the winter
A world of fragile things
Look for me in the white forest
Hiding in a hollow tree (come find me)
Vesper stood in the rain. She had nothing left now. She had betrayed James, Mr. White had the money, and her lover was likely dead. White had told her that night – the night that she pleaded for James' life – that only one of them would live.
"Which one will you choose?" he had taunted her.
She was dizzy; blood still seeping from the other's attempts to get the account code. Defiance was her only weapon now. "How do I know he's still alive?"
"You don't," Mr. White replied. "That's what makes the game so much more fun…"
When she didn't answer, Mr. White shrugged. "Have it your way."
"No!" The agony of the scream that tore from Vesper's already raw throat was nothing compared to the pain she felt as she muttered, "Don't hurt James."
Now she stood, beyond feeling, as the rain poured down her face. Strong arms wrapped around her waist, and Vesper breathed in his scent – forcing all memory from her mind. She was determined to live only in this moment.
"You okay?" James murmured in her ear as his chin rested on her shoulder. A smile tugged at her lips as she remembered the night he had been poisoned. His first thoughts after regaining consciousness were the same that he had just offered again. She turned in his arms, grateful that the raindrops hid her tears.
"Me?" she asked wryly. James responded by kissing her passionately. She ran her hands through his hair, returning the kiss until they broke apart, gasping. Her smile drifted away as she looked at him seriously. "How are you doing, James?"
He smiled softly; blue eyes twinkling. "Let's just say… I think I've recovered enough." Vesper raised her eyebrows in surprise and laughed as James took her hand, running through the rain and into an empty exam room.
I know you hear me
I can taste it in your tears
Vesper clung to the bars of the old elevator as the building crumbled around her. She had led James into this deathtrap! A sob tore from her throat as gunfire blasted below. I can't bear to lose them both, she thought desperately. I've destroyed everything I've ever loved.
Soon the only sound left was the merciless water, swirling beneath her. It seemed to call to her, and for a moment she was mesmerized by its waves. The rattling of the elevator door brought her back to herself, and she stared into James' eyes.
He must hate me. Yet she knew he would do everything he could to save her. Even now. But even if she couldn't save herself, she would save him from her. A strange, detached feeling spread over Vesper as she locked the door, pulled the key from the lock, and dropped it into the swirling water.
Now all she had to do was wait.
Holding my last breath
Safe inside myself
Are all my thoughts of you
Sweet raptured light
It ends here tonight
Her survival instincts kicked in at the last second, forcing Vesper to take a deep breath as she hit the water. It seemed fate wasn't going to make this easy for her.
Neither is James, she thought sadly as he appeared in the water before her. She grasped his hands and ran them over her cheek, marveling how cold they were. Vesper hurriedly pushed herself away from the door of the elevator. Just leave me here, she silently prayed. You'll be better off without me… She tried to scream as James began to frantically pull at the door of her cold metal coffin. The water stole her breath, and she coughed as her lungs filled. The last thing she saw as the world finally faded to black was James' arm, reaching for her...
Closing your eyes to disappear
You pray your dreams will lead you here
But still you wake and know the truth
No one's there
James awoke as the cries tore from his throat. He ran a hand over his face, wiping away some of the sweat. The same nightmare, he reminded himself. It seemed he was doomed to relive that moment every night in his dreams. Vesper locking the door, the elevator falling, seeing her choke as she drowned before his eyes.
Why would I need time? He had asked M. But it was a lie. James knew he needed time, but he also knew that a hundred years would not be enough.
Say goodnight
Don't be afraid
Calling me calling me as you fade to black
James walked calmly up the gravel path, tracking the progress of Mr. White. It was surprising how quickly the man could move, considering his age and injury. He ignored the man's whimpers as he strolled up the stairs next to him.
"Who are you?" Mr. White asked through his agony.
Revenge. An empty shell. The devil himself. Take your pick.
"Bond. James Bond."
The End
Whew!
Well, what do you think?