Seasons Change
"Tell me straight Topher," Samey said. "Why did you ask me out tonight?"
Topher smiled. "I'm not sure what you mean."
"Please. How long has it been? Total Drama was over ten years ago. We haven't spoken once. Then, out of the blue, you call me up. There must be a reason. I find it hard to believe this was all a spontaneous spur of the moment," she said. She seemed amused by the situation, but her words were tied down with clear sincerity.
"What if it was? People have done crazier things."
"Sure. But we're not talking about other people. We're talking about you."
Samey and Topher were at a bar in the west side of Vancouver. They first tried a cocktail bar with a roof top patio a couple blocks down, but it was too busy. Samey knew this place. She used to frequent it during her Masters at UBC. It had a nice laid back feel to it. On Thursdays, a jazz trio played softly in the corner. She'd grab a pint while working on her readings.
Topher wore a blue blazer with a white dress shirt and tan slacks. He'd aged roughly. His skin looked leathery and blotched with time. His hair was combed to the side, hoping to hide his slowly receding hair line. He had a slight aroma around him, not an expensive cologne, but an obvious name brand. His cleft chin was hidden behind a well-trimmed orange beard. He looked rougher than the Topher of Total Drama, who glowed with enthusiasm and charm. Across from Samey, he tried to avoid her gaze, and knocked down his pints quickly.
Samey barely resembled her younger self. She'd dyed her hair black, and it hung loosely around her shoulders. She was thin. Her slender frame looked frail. Her collar bones jutted out in her low cut top. She wore it with a pleated grey skirt. On her left arm, she had a half sleeve tattoo of roses climbing over top of each other, their ragged thorny stems choking the flowers below them. Topher might have walked past her when they first met on the street, if it was not for her penetrating blue eyes. In the dim bar, it almost looked as if they glowed.
"Maybe I am a spontaneous person. How would you know? We barely know each other." Topher pointed out to her. He took a large sip from his pint.
Samey shook her head. "Alright. Fair enough stranger. Tell me about yourself. Then I'll judge whether you're spontaneous enough to have invited me out here on a whim. What have you been up to these past couple of years?"
"I've been living in Hollywood."
"Really?" Samey rubbed the edge of her wine glass. "I doubt that."
"Not the nice part. Hollywood can be kind of crummy. None of the stars actually live in the neighborhood. I had a small apartment a couple blocks off the boulevard, over top of a pizza joint. Rent was cheap, but that was about all that was good about it."
"Alright. Fair enough. What were you doing there? Trying to be a star?"
"Well," Topher looked regretful, staring over her shoulder. "That's not too far from the truth. It's not that I wanted to be a star. My goals were never that big. I'd have been okay being a regular actor. Or, maybe, working in front of the camera on a show. You know, a host type."
"Like Chris?"
"Like Chris," Topher acknowledged.
"Sounds like you haven't changed all that much since Total Drama. I'm impressed you kept going at it. Especially considering it got you kicked off the show." Samey let out a slight laugh, remembering the circumstances.
"Yeah. Real funny. At least I got kicked off trying to stay true to myself, instead of pretending to be someone I'm not," Topher shot back. Samey's smile faded. She straightened her back in her seat. "Sorry. I didn't mean anything by it." He took an awkward sip of his beer, trying to avoid her gaze. "Anyways, that was why I was in LA. It seemed like the best place to get one of those regular gigs."
"So, how successful were you? Did you get any good parts?" Samey asked.
"No. Not quite. Unless you count a couple extra roles in the background. Even then, I was never on screen for more than a second. I spent most of my time there serving at a nice restaurant on Sunset. It was a good gig. I could make a couple hundred a night when I worked the bar. I was never poor there."
"Are you visiting now?"
"Here?"
"Yeah."
"No," Topher shook his head. "I moved up here a couple months ago. I'm here to stay."
"Why Vancouver?"
"My parents aren't too far. They're in Victoria. I did a couple semesters at SFU before I dropped out and headed south. So it seemed like a nice place to come back to."
"Any reason why you left California?"
"There's a couple." Topher ran his fingers through his hair. "The weather's beautiful there, but there's too much sun. It was not good for my skin. And I got laid off from work. I had no savings. I might have had a decent income, but I spent it all on blow and alcohol. My father was able to hook me up with a job at a marketing firm up here. I was in no position to say no. Plus," Topher took a deep breath, "whatever was left of the dream I had there, to become an actor or a host, it was not worth it anymore. I'd been to so many auditions. I'd responded to so many casting calls. Yet, I never got anything back. Not once. I couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't keep going."
"So you gave up?"
"In a sense, yes," Topher admitted.
"That's awfully depressing," Samey joked with a playful edge. Topher raised his eyebrows at her. "Sorry. Not to diminish anything. I get that it can be tough."
"Can you?"
"To be honest?" Samey took a sip of her wine. Her lipstick left a slight mark on the glass. "Not really. I've never had a dream I really cared about. Not like that at least. I think I've been too focused on trying not to be Amy. That's my dream."
"And how is that going?"
"Well enough. She's in Toronto now. It's much easier to differentiate yourself when you're a couple thousand kilometres away."
"What's she up to?"
"She's a lawyer. She just finished articling at this big Bay Street law firm. She's married too. Her husband's the vice president of this big corporation that makes most of the world's industrial water filters."
"Impressive," Topher commented.
"In a sense, yes," Samey relented. "Not that I envy them for a second. Both of their lives are their jobs. They work all day and all night. I doubt they ever see each other for more than a couple hours at a time. You really have to dedicate yourself completely in a situation like that. There's no way I could do it."
"What are you up to?"
"I'm working for the City of Vancouver Archives, as an archivist."
"Archivist?"
"Well, my proper title is Reproductions Specialist Technician. But it's hard enough for people to decipher what I mean when I just say archivist."
"An archive? What made you want to do that?"
"Well, it's a nice job. There's not too much pressure. I don't have a boss breathing down my neck all the time. My work mostly consists of assisting researchers to find records and making copies for them. I find it kind of interesting learning what others are researching. Also, I had pretty good grades in undergrad, but I didn't really feel like going into academia. A masters in archives sounded like more fun."
"Cool,"
"What's the marketing business like?"
"It's okay, I guess. It's mostly meetings and pitches. It can feel like we're not getting anywhere, but I like it enough." Topher scratched his beard. "I like that it is partially connected to the entertainment business. It might not quite be in the sense I was intending, but I take some solace in that. I'm still new. Even after six months, I feel like I'm still learning the ropes. Not that I'm complaining. It pays well enough for me to live in the city, which is all I can ask."
"Have you tried getting any work here? As an actor or host?" Samey asked.
Topher shook his head. "No way. That little stunt I pulled on Total Drama, while it did put my face out into the world, burned one too many bridges. There's no way I'll find any work in the industry up here in Canada."
"Chris has that much of a sway?"
"You'd be surprised."
"But that was over ten years ago."
"One of the first things you learn in the entertainment industry is people don't forget, nor do they forgive. Especially when someone tries to steal your livelihood. The first thing people are going to find when they look up my name is that whole fiasco. That door's shut to me."
"You have yourself to blame for that. It's not the only bridge you burned on Total Drama. Just so you know, I haven't forgotten how you treated me like shit on that show," Samey said pointedly.
"Hey I didn't treat you any worse than everyone else did." Topher took a large sip of his beer, glancing at Samey who did not seem pleased by his answer. "Fine. That's no excuse. I guess I was kind of a dick. But you know, I was young and stupid. Pretty sure we already established that by me single handily destroying my career this side of the border."
"It's alright. You don't have to make excuses. I had my own issues on that show too. I had actually done pretty well forgetting completely about it over the last few years, until you called."
"You mean you're not still in contact with anyone?"
"Not really. I used to be really close with Jasmine, but it's been a while since we last talked."
"Do you know what she's up to now?"
"She's actually not the far. She moved to the States to be with Shawn. He got a gig working on a zombie videogame series for one of the game developers down in Seattle. I guess you could say it was a dream job for him, he's apparently been slugging away in that industry hoping to work on that kind of a project. You know, Zombies."
"Are they still together?" Topher asked, surprised.
"Yep," Samey nodded. "At least they were when I last spoke to them, which was about a year ago now. They've been on and off since the end of the show. It's been tough with Jasmine living in Australia. After being separated for a while, Jasmine came over here for university to be with him. Near the end of her undergrad, she and Shawn got into a wicked fight, and she moved back to Australia. I thought they were done then, but Shawn actually decided to drop everything and follow her. I guess when Shawn got the job, and they needed to move back, Jasmine felt obligated to do the same."
"I can't imagine dating someone from Total Drama for so long. My relationships never last more than a few months." Topher admitted.
"Ten years is a long time." Samey agreed. "You've never been in a relationship that has lasted more than just a few months?" Samey asked with piqued interest.
Topher shrugged. "Yeah, but if you are looking for long term relationships, Hollywood is not the place to be. Everyone you meet is trying to get into the entertainment business. Everything is so competitive it is really hard to form any lasting bonds romantic or otherwise. I don't know, maybe now that I'm here in Vancouver things might be different."
"That seems kind of cheap. It sounds like you're blaming your surroundings. Not willing to take any personal responsibility?"
"Alright. Some of the relationships were a bit more complicated than that. And of course I'll take some of the blame for their failure. I mean, who isn't partially responsible for their relationships coming to an end? That doesn't mean I was a bad boyfriend. We just weren't looking for love."
"Sure," Samey spoke, unconvinced. "So, let's go back a bit. Why did you ask me out tonight? You've failed to convince me that you're a spontaneous person. There must be a reason why you asked me out now, here, after all this time." She tepidly traced her finger around the rim of her wine glass.
"What are you looking for? What do you want me to say?" Topher asked her. His tone defensive.
"I don't know. Maybe that this is not an innocent get together. That the reason you're here is to get in my pants. And please don't try to deny it. Guys have tried worse," Samey accused him. A sly confident smile crept over her lips.
"If you think I'm here to get in your pants, then why did you come?" Topher tried to throw back at her.
"Amusement? I'm not sure to be honest. It sounded like more fun than staying at home watching TV. Not that I'm going to fuck you," Samey said straight.
"Look. I did not invite you here just to sleep with you. Frankly, I'm a little insulted by the suggestion. If I wanted to get laid, why would I invite out someone I haven't seen for ten years, who has more than enough reason to dislike me? There must be easier people to go on dates with."
"I'm not denying that. To be honest, it's part of the conundrum. Why call me?"
"You want to know?"
"I do want to know," Samey said.
"Fine," Topher relinquished. "I wanted to hang out with someone who wasn't from my job. But I don't know anyone else in the city."
"What about the people you went to SFU with?"
"Most of them are gone. Not that I suspect any of them would want to see me anyways. It's not just at Total Drama that I burned a couple bridges because of my dream. I burned bridges with everyone I knew when I left to go south. I was certain I would never come back here. I would never need to see them again. But I was wrong, and now I'm here with my tail between my legs with no one who cares. That's why I invited you out. I hoped enough time passed that we could get along. I guess I was wrong." Topher stood up from his seat.
"Stop. Please. Sit down." Samey said. She turned to look if anyone else in the bar noticed, a little embarrassed by the scene. "I didn't mean anything by it. I'm sorry. Okay?"
Topher let out a sigh. He retook his seat. "It's fine. I would have assumed the same thing, if I was in your shoes."
"So, where do you want to go from here?"
"What do you mean?"
"This," Samey waved her hand wildly. "What do you want to do?"
Topher smiled. "I want to order another beer." He tapped his nearly empty glass.
Samey smiled back at him. She finished the rest of her wine. "Sounds like a plan to me."
…
Topher reached into his back pocket, and took a pack of cigarettes. "You want one?" he offered Samey. She shook her head. He shrugged, placing one in his mouth. He lit the tip with his lighter, and inhaled.
"You know those are bad for you, right?" Samey commented off hand. She stood by the edge of the curb, trying to wave down a passing taxi. The early morning street was covered in small pockets of people heading home from the bar. A cold fall wind blew along the road.
"Sure," Topher acknowledged, rubbing the arm of his blazer for warmth. "Let me put it to you like this: I'm trading one addiction for another, and this one is a lot healthier." He took another drag. "You doing alright? I'm freezing."
"I'm okay. I'm used to it. I bet this must be the toughest part of moving up north. Sure you're not missing the LA sun yet?"
Topher let out a slight smile. "Not yet. Ask me again during winter, and I'm sure my opinion will change."
"Sure thing. Oh!" A taxi stopped in front of Samey. She reached forward, and opened one of the back doors. She turned to look back at Topher. "You okay to get home?"
Topher nodded. "Yeah. I'm only a couple blocks from here. I can walk it no problem."
"Cool." Samey sat down in the cab. "Topher?"
"Yeah?"
"I had fun tonight."
"Me too."
And with that, she closed the door to the cab, and it drove off.
Topher stood there, cold, bogarting his cigarette, with his hands in his pockets, for a moment watching her go, smiling slightly on the Vancouver street.
...
Afterword:
This is a bit of a quieter story. If you liked it, feel free to check out our other stories.
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Till Next Time - Nyhlus and BJ