Author's note: Okay well this one I wrote after "badass Eugene". This means at this point I was hallucinating and questioning my life choices. Enjoy anyways.

BEFORE YOU READ IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY READ THE INTRODUCTION:

post/95896195708/okay-here-is-the-fic-i-talked-about-man-i-wrote-a

It had been the third date Delsin had this week. Another fan girl "running" into him and slipping their numbers into Delsin's hand with a seductive smirk. Eugene couldn't really blame them, he would too if he was a hot girl who wasn't friends with Delsin, but it still irked him. It wasn't like Delsin was interested in them; he went out with them for a good fuck, then never called again.

"Then she bent over trying to be sexy, but guess what?", Delsin asked not really expecting a response. "She farted. Man I swear she must have had a burrito or something because you could have smelt it a mile away." Fetch broke out in laughter, falling off her seat for dramatic measure. Delsin joined her, tears filling their eyes at the ridiculous and most likely exaggerated story.

Eugene couldn't help but giggle as well. Fetch was gasping for air on the floor and Delsin was wiping tears from his eyes. Their laughter was always contagious. No matter how stupid the joke or story, they always managed to get Eugene to chortle along with them.

"Oh man, D. She's a keeper," Fetch commented from the floor when she was finally able to talk. Delsin hummed in response. Shortly after Eugene continued to play on his DS, ignoring the presence of the other two conduits. At least until Delsin sat up suddenly, looking in Eugene's direction as if something suddenly occurred to him. Eugene gulped nervously. "Speaking of which," -Aw shit, thought Eugene- "I promised I would get you laid, man."

Eugene grabbed his hood and pulled it over his head, a nervous habit. "No, it's okay," he attempted to dismiss the thought from Delsin's mind. Delsin gasped in feigned horror, "He must be brain damaged," he told Fetch.

"Not everyone only has sex on their mind constantly, Delsin," dissed Fetch. Delsin gasped again, except louder this time. "What do you mean "not everyone has sex on their mind constantly", he said in fake ignorance."Don't you worry Eugene, we will heal you. Let's go find you a chick." Delsin stood and clapped his hands together. Eugene remained seated. "Actually, I'm not interested…in chicks," Eugene uttered tensely. He stared down at his DS immediately after not wanting to see Delsin's expression.

"Okay, then let's go find you a man," Delsin said again, but this time with the gender pronoun changed. Eugene wanted to facepalm, "Delsin." Delsin rushed to his side, "No, no, no. No complaints, common!" He grabbed Eugene's arm and pulled him off the couch. "Put your shoes on and Fetch, get up," Delsin ordered. "Where are we even going to go?"

"A gay club," Eugene deadpanned. "Are you serious?" Delsin was beaming down at him as he led him to the waiting line. "It's perfect," he argued. "And keep your hood down," he instructed, tugging down Eugene's hood revealing blonde hair. Eugene went to pull it back up, but Delsin slapped his hand away.

The people in line were being let in at a quick pace. That meant that they were standing in front of the bouncer in no time. Eugene's heart was beating at an incredible speed. He felt like it was going to tear a hole through his chest and make a run for it. Fetch put a comforting hand on his shoulder, helping him relax a bit. The bouncer gave them a once over and stepped aside, allowing entrance. Delsin saluted the man as he continued to led the way. Following closely behind were Fetch and Eugene.

Even with the flashing bright colorful lights the club was luridly dark. The majority of the people were males grinding on other males. There were the occasional lesbians here and there as well.

Delsin headed for the bar first. A guy in a plaid t-shirt behind the bar approached them, asking if they wanted anything. Delsin ordered the gayest looking drink he could think of just for Eugene. Eugene scowled once he received his drink. Fetch instantly took the pink drink from his hands, "What? It's good," she said when they gave her an incredulous look.

Eugene shrugged and ordered a beer, taking a seat on one of the stools. The man smiled and went to go get him a beer. Delsin sat beside him, "He smiled at you," he teased. Eugene rolled his eyes. "Doesn't mean he wants to suck his dick, Smokes," Fetch answered for Eugene.

Eugene thanked God for creating Fetch at that moment. Delsin scanned the club for someone he found appropriate for Eugene. "Oh! What about him?", he said as he pointed out a very ugly man. Eugene grimiced, "You're not very good at this," he told Delsin. Delsin groaned, "Well, I'm the only one trying. Put some effort in here. What kinda man do you like?" Eugene froze for a second. "What 'bout him," said Fetch, saving him once again. Eugene wanted to create a shrine dedicated to Fetch.

Eugene glanced at where she was pointing. Not that far from them sat a young man with cute dimples and glasses that fit his face perfectly. "He's cute," Eugene agreed.

"Go talk to 'im," said Fetch shoving him from his seat, ignoring Eugene's protest. "Wait- no. That would be weird, I can't just approach him and talk to him. What would I even say?", Eugene rambled. Fetch nodded her head at where the man was sitting. He was looking their way with an amused smirk. Eugene waved awkwardly at the man and the man waved back happily.

Eugene wanted to stay, but the man had already seen him and it would be fucked up to ignore him now. He takes back the thing he said about building Fetch a shrine.

Nervously, he walked towards the man and sat down beside him. The man smiled kindly at him and ordered another beer for Eugene. Eugene smiled in gratitude. "Your friends look interesting," said the man with a laugh. Eugene looked over at Delsin and Fetch, they were laughing at something together. "Yeah, they're great friends," Eugene responded. He soon regretted it when he realized it sounded forced. "Ah, I have the same issue," the man said. Eugene turned to gawk at the man. "Name's Ken," he said as he raised a hand for a hand shake. Eugene lifted his own, firmly shaking the man's, "I'm Eugene."

Every once in awhile, Eugene thinks about the man he met in the club. He thinks about how much better his life would have been if he did not like Delsin and decided to leave his number for the man to call him sometime. He thinks about how he could have been going on dates, both Ken and him forgetting about the people they have fallen for and deciding to go for someone new.

"I still don't understand why you didn't go for him," says Delsin every once in a while and Eugene also wonders why, but then Delsin will smile his way, and he remembers why. "Fuck," he whispers to himself as he looks over at Delsin with an arm thrown over another girl on the other side of the couch. What was her name even? Samantha? Tifany?

The better question was who decided to have a movie night at Delsin's and why did he come even when he was aware of Delsin's new girlfriend.

At least Fetch was here, he thought as he miserably leaned into her. Fetch mimicked Delsin, wrapping her arm around Eugene. "Let's go do something fun," Fetch whispered into his ear. Eugene eagerly nodded in response.

The two stood, earning the attention of the girl ( Killa? Beth? Rebecca?) and Delsin. "Where are you guys going?", Delsin asked a bit to eagerly. The girl (seriously what was her fucking name) looked slightly offended at his tone. "To do something illegal probably," she answered with a smile knowing Delsin was bored as well. As Eugene and Fetch started for the door, Delsin abruptly lifted off the couch. "Maybe we should go with them," he suggested to his new girlfriend. She frowned at him, "To do something illegal? No thanks," she declined the 'very tempting' offer. Eugene and Fetch began to walk again and Delsin was growing anxious. "Okay, well, tell me how the movie ends," he told his girlfriend, even though he wasn't really interested in knowing the ending.

The girl looked highly offended and raised both eyebrows. She opened her mouth, about to protest, but Delsin ushered Fetch and Eugene outside, slamming the door behind them. He sighed in relief. "Fuck, lets blow before she comes out," he said and neon dashed away from his apartment, Fetch barked in laughter and followed closely behind Delsin's blue trail.

Eugene stayed put, watching their running neon figures fade from sight. To be honest, he felt bad for the girl. She may be Delsin's girlfriend and he may be jealous of her, but he didn't hate her. He turned around and went back in.

The girl appeared to be on the verge of tears. He slowly walked towards her and sat down beside her, unsure of what to say. He decided a simple "I'm sorry" was good enough. The girl nodded stiffly, lifting a hand to wipe at her eyes. "It's okay, I know he only wanted a fuck and I was good with that, but wow to be ditched like this," she admitted. Eugene was taken aback by her words, not really expecting a confession like that. He was left unsure of what to say once again.

There were millions of things he could possibly answer with, but all felt wrong to say in this situation. He settled for remaining silent, focusing on the sound of curtains being swayed by the wind. The TV filled in for their silence, conversations were overrated anyways.

When Fetch and Delsin came stumbling through the door, they were giggling uncontrollably and leaning on each other in order to stay on their feet. Eugene figured they brought a bottle of whisky, drank it all together, and did stupid shit they might or might not regret tomorrow. Eugene was willing to bet that they wouldn't.

The girl had left after the movie. She thanked Eugene silently and slipped out through the door. Eugene was more than positive he would never see her again. It was obvious Delsin and her wouldn't get back together ever again. Eugene felt disgusted to admit that it made him feel slightly happy.

Fetch was the first to notice him, she let go of Delsin and stumbled towards Eugene, cuddling into his side, "Where were you?", she said through a yawn. Delsin took the other side of Eugene that was unoccupied. "Yeah, man. We missed you," Delsin added. Eugene's heart leaped at the confession, but then he sighed as he felt the pang of guilt. Fetch and Delsin must have mistaken that for a sigh of content because they snuggled in closer.

"I stayed with Delsin's girlfriend," he proclaimed. Delsin wolf-whistled and Fetch let out a longer than necessary "oooooo". Eugene rolled his eyes, but couldn't prevent a smile as the corners of his mouth lifted. "You guys are idiots," Eugene scolded jokingly, which only caused them to giggle.

For the first time in a long time, he was able to fully enjoy the presence of Delsin. Even if he was drunk and Eugene was feeling guilty as hell.

Much to Eugene's joy, the string of girlfriends was ceasing down to one or two a month. Delsin's excuse was that they were becoming a hassle and finding time to hang out with his "best friends" was too difficult for his liking. Eugene, like Fetch, didn't complain. They were overjoyed to have their "smokes" mostly to themselves.

However, Eugene still couldn't help but feel unsatisfied. He figured he could have gone forever being Delsin's friend, but as time passed by he felt more and more like committing actions or saying words that a friend word never say.

A friend would say "I love you" sincerely, but not in a romantic way. A friend would kiss you on the cheek, but not on the mouth. A friend wouldn't be staring longingly in your direction when you weren't looking.

Eugene snapped out of his daze as he heard something heavy drop on the floor near him. Fetch was staring down at him with mouth ajar. Her eyes bounced from Eugene to Delsin who was in the kitchen in front of Eugene. He apparently didn't hear the box Fetch was carrying crash onto the floor because he didn't turn around. Eugene silently thanked the maker of headphones.

"Oh my god," she gasped out. "No, Fetch-listen," he tried to quiet her down, but she suddenly started towards Delsin. Eugene jumped on her back, tackling her to the ground. "Fetch! What are you doing?", he asked startled. She wrestled him on the floor, trying to get him off her. "I'm going to kick his ass!", she yelled in anger. Eugene choked on a gasp. "What?", he asked in confusion. Fetch stopped struggling against the shorter conduit to look him in the eye. Eugene had never seen her so angry before. "That asshole fucked and brought home so many girls while you suffered in silence," she explained bitterly. Eugene glanced up, making sure Delsin was still not paying attention to them. Delsin was dancing along to whatever song he was listening to on his ipod as he made a peanut butter sandwich, Eugene sighed in relief.

"Fetch, no. It's okay," he reassured without letting go of her, just in case. Fetch narrowed her eyes, "No, it's not," she said defiantly. "I know you want to help the situation, but kicking his ass won't make him like me or make him gay," Eugene tried again.

"I know it won't, he's bi," Fetch apprized. Eugene gave her a blank stare. "What?" Fetch sat up, forcing Eugene off her. "When he likes a person of one gender, he only fucks people of the opposite gender," Fetch clarified. Eugene continued to stare at her as if she had grown a third leg and given birth to a baby alien. "Jesus Christ, just fucking talk to him," she ordered and stood up. Gathering the abandoned box into her arms, she exited the room without a backwards glance.

Eugene looked down at his unmoving legs. He was unsure on how legs worked, how was Eugene suppose to talk to Delsin if he didn't know the function of legs. Eugene sighed. That was pathetic, even for him. He soon found himself on his feet, staring at Delsin who was now singing along to a song.

Eugene approached Delsin as slowly as physically possible. In fact, Delsin even met him halfway due to how sluggish his speed was. Delsin raised an eyebrow at him and removed an earbud. Dio blasted through the bud as he let it swing down to his chest. It's only lifeline being the other bud, which was still in Delsin's ear.

"Delsin," was all Eugene said. He cursed himself mentally for being such a wimp. "Yes?", Delsin drawled out, a bit confused by Eugene's behavior. "I'm," Eugene began, but paused again. He wanted to punch himself in the face. "Yes?", repeated Delsin, except this time slower. "…Interested in you," he finished lamely. "Um," Delsin edged Eugene on. "Sexually," Eugene specified. "Oh," Delsin nodded. I'm so going to kill Fetch, he thought, but then Delsin leaned down and kissed him.

It was gentle, loving, and everything Eugene wasn't expecting a kiss from Delsin to be. Eugene leaned into the kiss and Delsin deepened it, pulling Eugene closer to him by his waist.

The need to breath soon became more important than the kiss itself and they pulled apart. Eugene smiled up at Delsin. "I'm interested in you, too," Delsin said. "Sexually," he added with a smirk. "Not until you shower ten times and test yourself for AID's. Did you even keep count of how many girls you fucked?", Eugene said with a grimace as he pushed Delsin away. The look of distress on Delsin's face was enough to satisfy him for an eternity.

Author's note: Did I forget to mention that I don't know how to write a kissing scene because I've never actually kissed someone? Well yeah, happy fucking birthday. Mock the virgin for lack of skills. (seriously where is all this anger coming from?)