Gilmore ******************
Random Vignette, Inspired by the Santa-Burger.
by Goblynn.

"Luke, gimme coffee."
"No."
"Please?"
"No."
"Why?"
"That stuff'll kill you."
"Luke, gimme coffee."
"No."
"Please?"
"No."
"Why?"
"That stuff'll kill you."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Hmmm. Interesting. So, tell me, Mr. Danes--will coffee kill me fast, or will it force me to endure a slow, agonizing death…much like the one you're gonna face if you don't gimme some coffee?"
He glared at her over his order pad. "You're a fruitcake, you know that?"
"Yes. I only show up on the doorsteps of people that don't like me. Kinda like the boomerang from hell."
"You're not the boomerang from hell."
"Oh, so you're saying you like me?" She spun around on her stool to face the other customers. "Hear that, folks? Luke likes me!" She spun back around, grinning wildly at the increased chatter behind her.
"You love torturing them, don't you?"
"Like you live to destroy Taylor's dreams of a theme-decorated town."
"Point made. So, you want anything?"
"More coffee, please."
"Lorelai--"
"Luke--coffee. Now." She held out her cup for the next refill. "And some breakfast, please. Rory's at her grandmother's, so it's just you and me, bub."
"And a diner full of customers. You want pancakes?"
"Yeah."
"Chocolate chip?"
"Nope. Plain, today."
"You serious?"
"Yeah. I wanna walk on the wild side."
Luke rolled his eyes. "Well, you still want whipped cream?"
"Oooh, definitely. Gotta have that."
"Fine. It'll be right out." He left the coffee pot beside her and disappeared into the back.

Lorelai sipped her coffee, a rare moment of quiet overtaking her as she considered Luke. Her unusual mood stemmed from a conversation with Rory late the night before…as usual, they'd been talking about men--Dean, Tristan, the End of the Max Affair, and Christopher. Luke had slipped into the discussion somehow (Lorelai strongly suspected that her daughter had done it on purpose), and for reasons yet to be explained. All that Lorelai could understand at this point was that Luke was oddly attractive, that he evidently liked her (quite a lot, if Rory could be believed), and that she most certainly liked him. Strange.

He reappeared, plate in hand.
"Luke, what's a pirate's favorite letter?"
He paused, the plate freezing in mid-air. "What?"
"I said, what's a pirate's favorite letter?"
He quirked an eyebrow at her. "I give up."
"Arrrrrrrr."
"Yeah."
"Get it? Arrrrrrrr…you don't get it, do you? It's easy, Luke--just go 'arrrrrrrr.'"
"I'm not going 'arrrrrrrr.'"
"Go 'arrrrrrrr.'"
"I get it, Lorelai."
"No, you don't. You just won't admit it. Go 'arrrrrrrr!'"
He sighed, plate still in hand.
"Go 'arrrrrrrr,' Luke. I'm gonna ask until you do."
"Marry me, Lorelai." He sat the plate down.
"Oh, I'm not falling for that again. You just want me to shut up."
"You're right. Eat your pancake."
"Fine, I will." She looked down.

The clatter of her silverware hitting the counter drew the eyes of everyone in the room. Luke looked over at her from the other end of the counter.
"Problem?"
"Luke…umm. What's--what's this?" She whispered, pointing at her plate.
"It's a pancake."
"No, it's not."
He came back to where she was sitting. "Yes, Lorelai, it is."
"Doesn't look like any pancake I've ever seen."
"What does it look like?"
She lowered her voice again. "I know what it looks like. I wanna know what you think it looks like."
He leaned over to get a better view of her plate. "Well, it looks like a pancake with a hole cut out in the middle."
"And?"
"And with a glob of whipped cream on it."
"Which is where?"
"On this one side."
"Making it look like…?"
"I don't know. A ring, maybe?"
"Ah-ha. You admit it."
"Admit what?"
"It's a ring!"
"No, it's a pancake."
"Okay, so it's a pancake that looks like a ring."
"No, it's not a pancake that looks like a ring."
"Fine! It's a pancake having a form that coincidentally resembles a ring."
"That I agree with. Except it's not just a ring."
Lorelai grew quiet.

"You meant that?"
"Yep."