All I want to say is that I recommend you watch this video before you read this. It's really cute.
www. youtube watch?v=uXfOPUrO12Y&safe=active
Your name is John Egbert, and by the rule of cliches you have to say this is the happiest day of your life.
Nevermind the fact that you're so nervous you're sweating in your tux in the winter, but honestly you don't even know why you're nervous. You're just committing to spending your life with the one guy you were totally gonna spend it with anyways.
His name is Dave Strider (shut up so what if you're a homosexual), and he's been your best friend since the both of you were six years old. Despite all your other friends, urging the both of you to get girlfriends, you were always content hanging out together, just the two of you.
You like to think that deep down you always loved him, but the truth is you'd always been oblivious to his advances until the day he sat you down and had an honest-to-god Talk about how he felt about you, with a capital T. It was actually over the phone, and you'd just sat there for roughly six minutes while your phone kept constantly dinging. You'd muted it after about five seconds. It was really cute, actually.
Eight and a half months into your immediate relationship, the day before your birthday, he popped the question. You still remember that day like it was a dream.
You stand in your kitchen, worried out of your mind as you eat oreos. You eat when you're stressed, it's a reflex that you don't care to control. Oreos are good.
Your boyfriend, Dave, usually gets home around 5:30 every single day from his stupid FedEx job, and this whole week it's been later and later and he's running out of shitty excuses. But today he didn't even come the fuck back - it's 2 AM and you can't sleep.
Well, not literally 2 AM - you look at the clock, it's 1:03.
Still, he's fucking late.
You sigh as you set your glass down in the sink. You are a grown ass adult, and you are definitely not on the brink of fucking crying here, no sir. You're about to shove the stupid oreos in the cabinet when the front door opens. You drop the oreos on the table, suddenly filled with relief and an almost giddy glee, which is quickly replaced by anger.
"Wasn't expecting you to be awake." He sounds a little disappointed.
"Where the fuck have you been?" You almost shout, the worry in your voice audible to your own ears. You aren't taking this from him anymore.
You want to accuse him of cheating on you, you really do, but you aren't even sure how he could pull that off. But he's a Strider, obviously he could if he wanted to. Before you can get the words out, however, he stops you with the cutest fucking expression as he takes off his shades. Damn it, you want to be mad at him! Rrgh!
"John, I'm really sorry I haven't been here for you this week. I value my time with you over everything, and believe me when I say this is for the better."
Okay, now you fucking know he's cheating on you. He tries to take your hand, but you pull it away. "You didn't answer my question, Dave."
He chuckles and shakes his head.
"I got you a little something to make up for it, though."
"I don't want your 'little something'. I want to know where you've been."
"I've been at work, John. I needed to get tomorrow off."
"You could have told me."
"I did, every day this week."
"Whatever." You turn away from him, grabbing another cookie and stuffing it in your mouth.
"John…" He takes your hand again and you huff, letting him. He looks up at you as he brushes his lips against your knuckles. "You're making this really hard for me, kind of ruining the mood. I didn't even want to do this until tomorrow, but since you're so nosy it's gonna have to be like this, so.."
Is he breaking up with you?
You sigh as he pulls out his 'little something'. You don't get a good look at it, but it fits in his hand easily.
"John Egbert," He continues, meeting your gaze. "I know I haven't been here when I should have a lot of the time, and I know I make stupid jokes and say stupid things and honestly I do some pretty stupid shit, too. I'm kinda hoping this isn't one of those things. Although I know you could get anyone you want with that cute Egbert grin, you chose to stick with me and that's what makes us special. I know I can be kind of stupid, but…"
He drops down on one knee, still holding your hand and making eye contact with you. Your sleepy brain doesn't quite register what he's doing until he opens the box.
"...do you think maybe you could tolerate me for awhile longer?"
You chuckle to yourself. Dave Strider's sweet and short, straight to the point. You twist the gold band on your finger, inscription reading 'Yours always - Love Dave.'
You really wouldn't have it any other way.
You look around at all your friends and family, starting to feel self-conscious. Where the hell is Dave?
If he's trying to remind you of that day, he's doing a stupid job of it. Maybe do oreos or something, but don't be fucking late. No.
The door at the other end of the aisle opens, and heads turn. It's Dave, fucking finally. Just striding up the aisle with a smug smirk.
You roll your eyes.
He's suddenly in front of you, and you flinch out of reflex, but grin. "You really need to stop being late to shit."
"Good things always happen when I'm late."
"God, I thought you were cheating on me or something, you dick. Just stand over there."
The ceremony is short, because you got your sister Jade licensed instead of hiring someone. Neither you nor Dave ever had the patience to sit through long weddings.
"Alright, so, John. Do you take this dick who was late to his own goddamned wedding to be your bfff-hubby-dude-whatever the fuck?"
Your hand hits your face with a smack. "Seriously Jade… but yes, I do."
"And Dave, are you sure you don't want to reconsider?"
"It's supposed to be an 'I do' question." You cut in.
She huffs. "You want to be annoyed by this geek for the rest of your life or until, you know, you get tired of him?"
Dave rolls his eyes, you can tell. "I do."
"Then with the power long-sleeve vested in me by whatever state this is-"
"Washington."
"-I now pronounce you gay as fuck. You may kiss the dipshit."
You pull him close, enjoying the feel of his lips against yours for a moment. He smiles against you as cameras flash.
"I love you, John."
"I love you, too, Dave."
"Alright, let's eat cake!" Jade yells, and everyone cheers.
That's the only part of your wedding you want to change.