A handful of thoughts crossed Hinata Hajime's mind all in a great jumble upon first waking up- that he was hungry, that he was very tired despite having slept a very long time, that he could still feel sand in his underwear even though his body had never actually touched the beach…and that he had killed Nanami Chiaki twice.
Other things about her came back to him slowly after that, during his first week or so awake on the true Jabberwock Island- the Nanami he had met at school, always happy to spend time with mere reserve course student like himself. Vibrant and talented- and not only at gaming, but at making friends, comforting others, and being kind- her short life had held meaning, or at least it had to Hinata, who's only pleasant associations with the school involved her. Able to travel between her dorm, to the classroom, to the arcade in town- she had been a normal girl. She had had parents, maybe even pets, attended Elementary school, and although she spent most of her time engrossed in games, she still knew of the world around her.
The second Nanami he had encountered had shared most of the same basic qualities, even though she had been tired a majority of the time. Though he had never expressed his concern to her, he had begun to worry about her, if perhaps she were ill like Komaeda, though now he knew that it had been nothing more than the strain of her program being ran in a way it was really never meant to.
Although she had been every bit as intelligent as the original, the AI had been naïve- even the concept of a cow giving milk was completely novel to her, to the girl who had never had a life outside of the program. He had wanted to teach her about the world, show her everything he could. That was only a distant dream now.
Both of these girls had been known as 'Nanami Chiaki'.
"And then Tanaka's hamster grabbed right onto the Old Man's-" Akane began to howl, slapping her thigh to punctuate the tale.
However, Hinata cut off the bawdy story with a weak attempt at a chuckle. "Err, actually, I think remember that too…"
"That's awesome! Glad to hear it! You know, I really think you've been remembering more and more lately! I'm really proud of ya." She reached out to thump Hinata on the knee, after which he endeavored to discreetly rub at the rapidly bruising area under guise of having an itch.
They had been doing this together ever since the survivors had first woken up. Once it had become clear that none of them had retained neither a full set of memories of their time at Hope's Peak, nor on the virtual island, the group agreed that each evening they would set aside one hour to sit across from a partner and trade stories about what little they did remember, hoping to jog one-another's memories. And so, Hinata and Akane had set up their folding chairs, the kind with the hard seat that makes everything bellow your waist numb after a few minutes- likely they were no harder than the ones in the reserve course had been, however after sealed in a pod for such long a time, Hinata now found himself with no small amount of restlessness- and seated themselves in a quiet corner away from where the others held their sessions as well.
"I've been remembering things from the simulation alright, more or less, but the school…" Hinata gritted his teeth, looking down at his hands tightly knitted together on his lap. "I know that… Nanami…it was me who-"
"Hey, now!" Akane stood, chair scooting backward as she balled her fist, as if ready to fight Hinata's inner demons for him, "You don't need to be thinking about that kinda crap. That wasn't you and you know it! Besides, you'll be seeing her again soon!"
Although he managed to soften his expression, his hands clasped together even tighter until his knuckles turnt white.
A third Nanami Chiaki was about to born in a matter of hours.
Sleep rarely found him these days. He wanted to think that it came of having slept in the pod for so long, though Sonia told him it was from worry, and he believed her. He often took to pacing the halls late at night.
The Nanami in the simulation had never had a problem sleeping, he remembered with a wry smile.
"How can you just nap anywhere like that?" He had asked her once upon finding her asleep in one of the poolside beach chairs. Anyone could have come along and made that moment her last.
She replied with a yawn, "Isn't it easier to think when you've had a good rest? Sometimes, if I'm stuck in a game, the solution seems obvious after I sleep on it…"
Hinata sighed. It would be much be easier he could sleep on what to say to newly restored Nanami he was about to meet with any moment now.
The clacking of heals from farther down the hall startled him out of the memory.
"Hinata-san!" Sonia nearly shouted, her princess-like composure nearly forgotten in her excitement at the news. "I'm so glad I found you! We wanted you to be the first to speak with her."
It was time.
In a fit of boredom and frustration shortly after first waking up, Souda had begun to dismantle anything and everything around the facility that he could get his hands on. Eventually, a floppy disc had fallen out the ceiling tiles. It had been labeled simply 'N.C.'.
Should I apologize, Hinata wondered as he approached the room. Would she even remember, or would she truly be just a third person who happened to share her name?
How could he even face her, after what he had done?
Still, if he had been brave enough to undergo that awful procedure, to make that foolish goddamn decision that ruined so much, the one he had so mistakenly thought he was enduring for her, only to cause her to endure such pain instead, he could open a door and once again and speak to the girl he cared for so much, whether she still knew him or not.
After all, she had been the last thing he had thought about before he was put to sleep, and the first thing he thought about upon his return to reality.
With a deep breath, he opened the door.
"Hinata-kun?" came the voice from the computer screen.
She knew him. The pixelated image on the screen looked more beautiful to him than she ever had before. Relief tinged with apprehension washed over him.
Despite having rehearsed in his head and finally deciding to allow her to set the pace, everything flooded out regardless then. "Nanami! I am so sorry for everything! For not saying good bye to you that day at school, for voting you guilty in the simulation, for what I- for what Kamukura did to you- and, and... you don't even know what I'm talking about, do you?"
The image on the screen simply smiled.
"I do remember, Hinata-kun. I'm not really sure why or how, but I do." Her voice was as even and soothing as Hinata remembered; he found his shoulders relaxing in spite of himself. "It wasn't your fault at the last trial. You know that I wouldn't have wanted all of you to die in my place."
"I know, I know," Hinata agreed, feeling his expression soften. "So, do you have any good games in there? Galaga?"
No matter if this Nanami was more like the one he had passed his schoolday breaks with, or the Nanami he had stolen quiet moments with on the beach, in that moment he knew for sure that he loved Nanami Chiaki no matter what.
End