England was sitting by his fireplace drinking tea. It was a few days before Christmas and he had finally finished decorating his make making sure that everything was in order and easily breakable decorations were put in a place America could not break them. His door bell rang and went to answer the door.

"How could possibly be at my door at this hour?" England inquired. He peered through window and saw the visitor and sighed, "Francis." He opened the door, "Come in but don't get snow into the living room."

"Thank you," said the shivering Frenchman, "I decided to give you your gift early this year. I wanted to make sure we were alone when I gave it to you because the other might get jealous." He tapped on the gift he was holding.

England looked that the box France was holding. I wonder why he's holding it down by his hips and not his chest like most people. It does not look very heavy. England reached over to grab the gift, "Here, let me get that."

"No, no. There's no need to do so," said France waving his hand, looking down making sure that he still had one hand on the gift. "I'll open it for you now." France put his hand on the lid and lifted it up.

"BLOODY HELL!" England yelled and jumped back. "What the hell is that!" he yelled pointing at the gift.

"Well…it's my dick…in a box," he answered with a large grin, "Don't you just love it Arthur!"

"NO! Why! My God Francis! Get that thing away from me," England tried to calm himself down and figure what was going on in France's sick mind. "What on Earth told you that this was a good idea?"

"Well I saw a video on YouTube and it said that it was the best gift to get your lover and it even had instructions and it was so catchy and.—"

England cut him off, "Stop, stop, stop. Was this video called 'Dick in a Box'?"

"Why yes! How did you know?" asked France who was excited that England knew what he was talking about.

"It's a joke Francis! They were never really suggesting that you do such a thing. Why do you think they get arrested at the end?" England stared at him amazed by his stupidity.

"I thought it was because they were in America and you know how he is such a prude." England face palmed at the response.

"Francis, please leave now before I suffer a brain hemorrhage." He gave France the lid back and opened the door and closed it quickly as France left.

"Maybe Matthew would like my gift," thought France as he made his way to his car.