Hmm... Hello! I wrote this story a long time ago, like back in March. Some of you might have read it already. I've been looking through my old stories; the ones I used to have on my old account. So don't be surprised if I update more. :) I've been in a Kogan bromance and Jendall mood lately. Haha... This story has both.
Kendall's world was breaking apart in front of his very eyes. As he held the white rose in his hand, tears dripping from his eyes, a strangled sob escaped his pale lips. All eyes turned to him in worry. His mom, Katie, James, Carlos, and Logan all stared at him with those big, watery eyes.
"Sweetie." Mrs. Knight made a move to reach the saddened blond, but Kendall backed up, his eyes wide with fear. His bottom lip trembled and his hands shook as a sudden realization hit him. What he thought was just a nightmare that haunted him every night was now becoming a reality.
"No," he whispered, tears springing to his eyes. "No! No! No!"
All eyes were now on the screaming boy. He shuttered as he realized that every single gaze held the same emotions. Sadness and pity filled everyone's eyes. He didn't know if it was sadness and pity for him or for her. Maybe even for both. But he knew the two emotions were there, in everyone's tear-stained face.
Without even thinking about it twice his legs moved involuntarily. As he ran away from the people, from the sorrow, and from the tears he could hear several people calling his name. Everyone kept begging for him to come back, but he didn't listen.
He couldn't go back. It hurt to even think about her. It would kill him to see her coffin get buried deep in the earth.
Everything hit him all at once. Every single emotion he had been hiding for three days straight finally clawed up his throat. Sobs departed his lips; tears leaked from his eyes and rolled down his pale cheeks. His knees shook from under him, not giving him enough strength to keep on running or even to stand up.
He fell hard on his knees, sobs shaking his whole body. He couldn't take the pain anymore; it was all too much for him to handle. He was just seventeen. No 17-year-old should have to suffer this much.
No 17-year-old deserved to suffer as much as she had.
The rose he had been holding in his right hand fell to the floor without making one single noise. He couldn't help but notice how ironic it was that the rose matched up to her perfectly. She was so beautiful in his eyes yet she couldn't see it. She had fallen so hard and her cries went unnoticed. No one heard her pleas for help. No one tried to help.
"Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!" Kendall spat under his breath. His fingers were wrapped tightly around his dirty blond hair, clutching it so hard that cries of pain escaped his lips once again. He pulled and pulled, wishing he could just die then and there. Wishing he could be swallowed by the earth once and for all. He didn't want to live like this.
"Kendall," Logan whispered as he removed both of Kendall's hands from his hair and held them tight in his own. "What are you doing, buddy?" he asked, warm tears begging to escape and roll down his cheeks at the sight of his broken best friend.
"Why?" Kendall squeaked out, his whole body shaking from the sobs and the cold winter air. "Why did she do it?" he asked again when he realized that Logan held a puzzled look on his face.
"Kenny, she is the only person who can answer your question."
Kendall nodded, knowing that Logan was probably right. But anger boiled up inside of him soon enough. "So I'm gonna live my whole life not knowing why she did it? This could be all my fault and I don't even know! I hate this! I hate her! I hate everyone!"
"Kendall, you know that's not true," Logan said as he rubbed Kendall's arm comfortingly. The blond shook his head, not knowing what to believe.
"I-I just feel so confused."
Logan didn't even have the chance to respond before Kendall threw himself at him, wrapping his arms around the older boy's neck. Loud sobs wracked Kendall's body and forced him to bury his face into Logan's chest. Logan's hand rubbed small circles on Kendall's back as he wrapped Kendall in a tight hug, holding him as close as possible.
"I m-m-miss her so much, Logie!" Kendall cried into Logan's chest.
"I know, bud. So do I. B-but remember she is now in a better place. She's away from all the pain and suffering. She's okay now. Everything will be just fine," Logan whispered in Kendall's ear.
"I wish she was here," Kendall whimpered. He unburied his face from Logan's chest and looked up at the brunette, his light green eyes meeting Logan's chocolate brown ones.
"She is here." Logan smiled.
"Then why can't I see her?" Kendall asked, his eyebrows knitting together in confusion.
"Because… she is invisible."
"She's dead, Logan! Of course she's invisible!" Kendall spat at the older boy, anger boiling in his veins.
A frown came to Logan's face at his friend's sudden mood change.
"You know, before my mommy passed away... she once told me that whenever someone dies, they are invisible to everyone in the world. But if you really loved that person with all your heart and you really want to see them again, all you have to do is believe in it."
"How do you know it wasn't a lie?" Kendall felt bad for asking this, but he refused to believe Logan's words.
"One; because my mommy would never lie." Kendall chuckled humorously. "And two; because it worked with me." This time, Kendall stared at his best friend as if he had two heads.
"W-with who?" he asked, curiosity getting the best of him.
"With my mom," Logan responded, fresh tears rolling down his cheeks.
"Logie, don't cry," Kendall pleaded. He wrapped his arms around Logan once again and planted a small kiss on the boy's head.
"I'm okay." Logan bit down on his bottom lip and watched as a single tear rolled down Kendall's cheek. "Come on, we gotta say goodbye." He stood up from the ground and held out his hand for Kendall to take. The younger boy looked hesitant for a while but took it anyway and stood up with Logan's help, grabbing the white rose from the ground.
The two boys stood next to each other as everyone said their goodbyes. Seeing that Kendall was having a hard time, Logan went before him. When he returned he gave Kendall's shoulder a squeeze and whispered in his ear, "Stay strong, buddy."
Kendall nodded and walked to where her coffin stood. He looked down at the all-too-familiar face of hers and held back a sob. With a shaking hand, he placed the rose on top of the coffin and blew a kiss in her direction.
And as a warm tear rolled down his cheek, he whispered for only her to hear, "You will always be my cover girl, no matter what the rest of the world may think. You will always have a special place in my heart. No one will ever replace you. I love you." And as he turned back around to face Logan, he could have sworn that he saw a blonde girl standing beside him, smiling for only Kendall to see.
Ooh yeah! Jendalliness. Lol. Is that even a word? Of course it's not. Or at least it wasn't. Now it is. :) Did you guys like it?
~ BigTimeRush-BTR :)