Ever have an idea that just won't leave you alone? This is what happens when one of those ideas meets the completely useless course known as Statistics. Enjoy!

"Does something seem missing to you?"

Kyle glanced around. He and Stan were playing videogames in the Marsh family living room on a Friday morning, a week after school had let out for the summer. In the kitchen, Sharon Marsh was cleaning up dishes from breakfast, and humming to herself absent-mindedly. Randy was at work, and Shelly was upstairs messaging her 'boyfriend'. "Well... Cartman's not here annoying the shit out of us."

They were almost used to that by now; it had been almost six months since he'd been sent to Juvie for nearly killing Vicki. Things had been going as expected with him, according to Butters, but they still had some worrys that he would charm the parole board into letting him out without being properly rehabilitated. Vicki wasn't looking forward to testifying at the hearing that would be coming up, but Kenny was more than ready to bash Cartman into the ground...

"Kenny and Vicki aren't here." Stan said suddenly. "Usually they've wandered in by now." Wandered in was exactly the way to describe it. They would usually come right in without even knocking, plunk down on the couch, and watch them play whatever game they had on, before losing focus and ending up making out on the couch like they did everywhere else. Sometimes, they'd start getting a little too heavy and then one of them would have to remind them where they were and who they were with. But it wasn't too much of a problem...

"They probably just decided to try something new, and Kenny can't get out of the leather suit or whatever." Kyle said dismissively. "Give them an hour or two and they'll show up."

Stan frowned at him. "Okay, I think you need to lay off the porn for a bit, Kyle. I don't even want to know why Kenny would be in a leather suit."

"Vicki likes sexual guys, and if I want a shot with Vicki, I need to know sex at least half as well as Kenny."

"Meanwhile, Wendy and I just graduated to making out for fifteen minutes."

Kyle couldn't help it. "Do you still barf on her afterwards?"

He ducked the controller that went whizzing by his head and crashed into the back of the couch.

"I think we should go make sure they're alright."Stan said calmly, as if he hadn't just chucked a game controller at his best friend."I know Cartman's locked up, but someone else may have it in for them. NAMBLA and NAMGLA may have joined forces to kidnap the most sexually active kids in South Park." The North American Man/Boy Love Association had grown enough to open up a sister organization; the North American Man/Girl Love Association, so that both pedophile types were represented. Because sick bastards needed representation.

"You do know you sound like Tweek when you say stuff like that, right?"

"Better to sound crazy and paranoid than have my friends raped."

Kyle could see it was a losing battle. "If you want to go look for them in the tree house, fine. But don't hold me responsible for walking in on major kink."

They packed up the game, and headed off down the road to Stark's Pond. "Have you ever wondered if maybe they've been faking it the whole time?" Stan asked suddenly. "That they're not just up there playing monopoly like normal kids?"

"Yeah, but then I remember that day we were hiding from Cartman, and they kicked me out for a quickie. Believe me, those noises were real." Kyle couldn't help but smirk at the look of disgust on Stan's face. "You really don't get sex, do you?"

"How is sticking your dick into some chick, then having cum come out of it and into her, not gross?"

"When you put it that way, it does sound kinda gross." He admitted. "But it's biologically in us to do it. That's how the species survives."

"And sticking your face between a girl's legs so you can tongue-fuck her?"

"... Some guys like Kenny are just weird."

Reaching the tree house, Stan did the honours of announcing their arrival. "YOU GUYS UP THERE?"

Kenny's head popped out of the trap door. "Yeah."

"You decent?"

Vicki joined Kenny. "Define decent."

Kyle rolled his eyes. "Are we going to be scarred for life by Kenny's scrawny ass if we come up there?"

Beside him, Stan whispered. "What about Vicki?"

"Are you really going to complain if Vicki's naked, Stan? Really?"

"Kenny's ass is covered, and I'm not naked, so yeah, we're decent enough." She replied, oblivious to the side exchange. "C'mon up."

Climbing into the tree house, they were assaulted by the smells of musk and sweat. "Dude, you guys need to clear this place out." Stan complained, cracking open one of the plexi-glass windows.

"Like I've said before, I didn't build this place as a social club." Kenny grumbled, pulling a t-shirt over his head, and messing up his dark blonde hair even worse than before. "In fact, I'm thinking of enforcing a 'No Pants' rule."

Vicki smacked him upside the head. "You are such a dick sometimes. I think it would be good to actually spend some time with our friends. I mean, we can fuck at three in the morning, but we can't play basketball."

Kenny looked mildly annoyed. "But what about that thing we were working on?"

Vicki glanced at the other two. "It can wait. We have time for that."

"What the hell are you two talking about?" Kyle couldn't help asking.

"Shouldn't some things be between two consenting persons?" She responded loftily.

"Well, you don't exactly keep your sex between the two of you." Stan snorted. "If I have to hear one more word from Wendy about what you two 'do that we should think of doing someday' I will punch my eardrums out with ballpoint pens."

"Alright, and when she finally gets things going between you two, you will love me for life."

The look of mingled disapproval and nervousness on his face was enough to make Kyle laugh. "Dude, when did you become the uptight one?"

"Oh, you think you're so cool and comfortable with sex, Kyle, just because you read Playboy?" Kenny teased. "Do you even know what BDSM is?"

"Do you?"

At this, a perverted grin crept across not his, but Vicki's face. "Do you want to find out, Kyle?"

He felt the bottom drop out of his stomach. He knew, and the idea of Vicki tying him up, whipping him, dominating him, was... hot as hell. But the fact was that she was Kenny's girlfriend, and that meant off limits unless he wanted to lose his friends' respect. Goddamnit... "Not everyone's kinky, Vicki. Some of us like plain old vanilla."

"Poor unlucky bastards you are, too." Kenny grinned, slinging his arm around his shoulders. "So, who's up for a game of basketball?"

****************************************This town is colder now, I think it's sick of us*****************************************

Butters sat down at the table across from Cartman with a sigh. Every week since he'd gone to Juvie, he had come to visit him out of both the kindness of his heart, and concern that he might go even more crazy than before. Usually the visits were either spent in near silence, or listening to Cartman's ranting about 'how that bitch had set him up'. That bitch being Vicki, or course

"Hey Butters." Cartman sighed. "Anything new going on in Shit Park?"

"W-well school's been let out, and everyone's real excited about it. Kenny and Vicki have been so excited about it, we haven't seen much of them for the past week. I don't know where they go, or what they do, but they sure do like to have an awful lot of time alone together."

The fat prisoner snorted. "They go out to the woods to fuck, Butters. Don't you know that? They go out there, to wherever they set up camp, get naked, then Vicki spreads her legs like the whore she is, and then Kenny takes his dick and shoves it into her. That's what they've been doing all week. That's what they've been doing for six goddamn months while I rot in this dump."

Butters glanced over at the guards, who were usually listening to every word they said, and normally would have given Cartman a warning by now. But today they were preoccupied with a young couple who were getting close to violating the visitation rule about no making out. "Eric, I think maybe you should let it go. It's not like Kenny was her first—that was her dead boyfriend, Matt. I was so surprised when I learned that, because Vicki's very sweet, but then again just because you like to express your love physically doesn't mean you have to be like a pervert like Kenny."

"'Express your love physically'? That's what you think they're doing? Vicki is nothing more than Kenny's cum slut who only feels good about herself when she has someone pounding into her pussy, and Kenny only sees her as a pair of open legs. THEY DON'T LOVE EACH OTHER!"

That caught the guards' attention. "That's it, visit with your little boyfriend's over, Cartman, back to your cell." One of them growled, while another grabbed him by the collar of his orange jumpsuit, and dragged him out of the visiting room. Butters stood and left of his own accord. After listening to that, he knew it would be best if he testified at the parole hearing, and not in Cartman's favour like he'd planned to. The poor guy was still loony-tunes, and not the good kind like Bugs Bunny. He'd go to the meeting with the Deputy District Attorney the others had told him about tomorrow...

**************************************It's time to make our move, I'm shaking off the rust**************************************

Kenny watched his girlfriend shooting hoops against Stan, and couldn't help but wonder where they were going. The last week had been lots of sneaking her out of her house, and strolling into his at three in the morning. Not to mention being practically inseparable all day long. But today Vicki was talking about spending time with their friends, and maybe even having a girls' night with Wendy and Bebe, while he and the guys hung out and did whatever guy stuff they'd done before...

Was it she wanted to put a little distance into their relationship? Was she thinking about breaking up? Kenny didn't really know; they'd stopped really talking about that kind of thing the last week of school. That was when it had really started into the 'fucking all the time' phase. It was almost like they didn't really know what else to do with each other. And even his testosterone saturated brain knew that was how relationships ended.

Kyle sat down on the bench beside him, taking a long pull of his water bottle. "You know, I think Vicki's been the best thing that's ever happened to you, dude."

"What makes you say that?"

"You're not covered up with that goddamn parka of yours all the time. The girls didn't even know what you looked like before, but now... people can actually see you."

It was true; he'd started wearing his parka less and less as the months wore on, and now with the addition of the summer warmth... he didn't plan on wearing it at all. "I don't really know why I wore it in the first place. I mean, besides the fact that it was the only warm thing I owned."

"Maybe it was a security thing, to keep people away. No one could hurt you if they didn't get close to you."

Kenny shrugged. "Maybe."

He felt a sudden urge to tell Kyle that things weren't as great as they seemed with him and Vicki. That the closer they got physically, the further apart they were emotionally. But guys didn't talk about their relationships; girls did. Guys talked about... "I think Vicki kinda wants to be the first girl you have sex with."

"What?"

"She talks about how you deserve someone who'll be able to give you the best, and someone you trust. I know you like her, and I know you trust her, and I know she knows it too. But I don't know if I should tell her to drop the idea. I mean, the idea of sharing my girlfriend kinda pisses me off, but I want her to do whatever makes her happy, and if that's a fuck with someone else, I would rather have it be one of my best friends, you know?"

Kyle was staring at him with wide eyes. "Let me get this straight; your girlfriend wants me to fuck her before any other girl, and you're on the fence about it because you want her to be happy?"

"Yeah."

"So then tell her no."

Kenny blinked. "Tell her no?" Kyle wanted him to tell Vicki not to fuck him? What sort of red-blooded male was he? And how was that supposed to make her happy?

"I don't care that much about getting laid, dude," Kyle explained. "But I do care about my friends. You guys are good together, and I know you make Vicki happy dude—she doesn't need me. And I don't need her to be the one."

He was one hell of a good friend. "Thanks dude."

"Thanks for what?"

"For not being like me. If it was your chick who wanted to fuck me, I'd be all over her so fast, it'd make your head spin."

The red-head's eye twitched slightly. "Good to know."

Vicki and Stan chose that moment to join them at the bench. Vicki smirked at them. "You guys gonna play, or sit on your asses?"

"Eh, it's more Kyle's game than mine." Kenny grinned up at her. "In fact, I think I should go check on Karen. I'll probably find her chewing on the carpet for something to eat while Mom's at work and Dad drinks himself to death."

"Alright" Vicki leaned down to kiss him. "Go be a good big brother, while I kick Kyle's ass, and I'll stop by later."

Before he'd even left the court, Vicki and the boys were back to shooting hoops, her shrieking laughter ringing out above the sound of the ball hitting the pavement. It was a strange sound—they'd hardly been apart since getting together six months before. Mostly because they felt safer together, and considering that he'd only died twice since they'd met...

But they had to wake up from the honeymoon phase one day, and maybe that day was today. Maybe this was where the possibility of breaking up would even cross their minds. Just because they were together now, didn't mean they would always be. Things could happen, whether it was Kyle coming between them, or the parole hearing, or something else. It couldn't really last forever.

R&R?