A/N: Here's a little crackfic I wrote yesterday. I just loved the whole idea of the mess Elsa gets into... My friend forced me to post this and threatened to post it under her account if I didn't. So, here you go... It's very cracky...
Beams of winter sunlight streamed in from the window as Elsa groggily opened her eyes. Groaning, she turned over and tried to fall back into sleep.
Just as she was going under, realization hit Elsa like a wall of bricks.
It's the wedding day.
The queen's eyes popped open and she leapt out of bed, hastily checking the old clock on the wall.
7:40.
"Fuck! I slept in!" Elsa hissed under her breath, pulling her brand-new white dress out of her wardrobe and racing out the door towards her bathroom.
"Shitshitshitshitshit!" Elsa slammed the bathroom door shut, tossed her dress onto the counter, and began to rip her nightclothes off. Looking in the mirror, Elsa let out a wretched gasp. Her hair was still in a braid from the night before!
She turned on the water to heat it up, cursing and trying to untie her hair. It always took forever...
It took some ripping and yanking, but Elsa had finally managed to undo the braid. She stepped into the shower and sighed.
"Oh man, I could stay in here for HOURS." she thought, but then remembered, "Crap, I can't. I gotta Hurry up hurry up HURRY UP!"
Elsa hurried through shampooing her hair, but made sure it was all rinsed out. Gummy shampoo hair was DISGUSTING- and she didn't want that on her wedding day.
"Elsa!" she heard a call from outside the door.
Fuck, Elsa thought. Hans.
"Yes?" she called.
"Are you still in there? We're going to be late, hurry up, now."
Elsa groaned. "I'm hurrying, dammit!" Anger at herself welling in her head, Elsa fiercely grabbed for the soap, but slipped over her own feet.
"GAH!" she shouted, and a burst of ice sprang from Elsa's fingertips. It hit the shower floor, turning almost all the water to solid ice in less than a second.
Elsa clasped her hands over her mouth and tried to fully stand up. She was frozen mid-fall, and her feet were completely immobilized by ice. The water had stopped running, too, and there were flakes of frost in her hair.
"Elsa? Are you alright?" she heard Hans say.
"Fucking hell..." Elsa whispered. She tried to pry herself out of the ice, but it was useless.
"Um... Y-yeah, I'm fine..." Elsa stammered, her hands shaking. Looking around for resources, she spotted the shampoo bottle and threw it at the ice in an attempt to break it. Nothing.
"What was that?" Hans asked suspiciously. "Nevermind. Since the water's off, I expect you'll be out soon. I'll just get going-"
"No! Wait!" Elsa cut him off. "Uh... Can you come in here for a sec?" Elsa winced. What else could she do?
"Are you decent?" Hans asked.
"Just open the fucking door, Hans."
"Alright."
Elsa trembled as Hans entered the bathroom. What in hell was she thinking?
"I thought you were out of the shower." Hans said disapprovingly to the shower curtain.
Elsa coughed awkwardly. "Well, you see, I'm in a bit of a... Predicament."
Hans sighed. "Elsa, you said it yourself, 'Wait til we're married.' if you could just wait a few hours-"
"NO!" Elsa hissed. "I'm.. Uh... I'm kinda... Stuck?"
"Wait, what?"
"Just come over here."
"Should I lock the door?"
"Sure. Why not. Just... Help me."
Hans clicked the door shut and warily walked towards the shower curtain. "Elsa, you sure you don't want to wait...?"
"HANS OPEN THE FUCKING SHOWER CURTAIN NOW. IT'S NOT ABOUT THAT."
He pulled the curtain back and was immediately woah-ed by Elsa. "Daaaaaamn." he thought, not even noticing the ice.
Elsa attempted to cover herself with her arms. "See? Stuck." she gestured to the frozen water.
Hans tore his gaze unwillingly from Elsa and looked at the ice, laughter threatening to burst out of him. "Wait... You... Froze the water?" he snickered a little.
"Yes, I was rushing!" Elsa's face flushed red. "Can you just get me the hell out of here?!"
Hans put a hand to his face and laughed airily. "Really? You really froze-"
"FUCKING HELP ME NOW OR WE'RE GOING TO BE LATE." Elsa shouted.
Hans jumped a bit. "Okay, okay. Let's just..." he grabbed ahold of Elsa's arms and shoulders, attempting to pull her out of the ice. No use.
"Maybe if I try..." he then tried to break the ice like Elsa had. Still nothing.
Elsa was completely mortified. What a STUPID thing to do...
"Wait." Hans stood up and looked at Elsa's face skeptically. "Love will thaw... ELSA. THAT'S IT!"
Elsa raised an eyebrow. "Huh? What are you..." she trailed off, suddenly realizing what he was saying.
"You know exactly what I mean," Hans said with a smirk.