Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters and certainly not Bill Clinton (thanks goodness!)
Narrator: It was a beautiful day in Spiral Mountain. Banjo got up, arched his back, and felt excruciating pain. He looked over at where his buddy Kazooie lay, croaking in pain.
Kazooie: Banjo, bring me my pills please! (cough, cough) My feathers hurt this morning.
Banjo: Hang on there buddy, heh heh.
Narrator: It was a special day, 50 years ago, Banjo had defeated the witch for the second time.
Banjo: Whoowe, let's get funky. (turns on record player, Elvis begins to wail)
Kazooie: Banjo, bring me my pills and my porridge! You know I can't get out of bed.
Narrator: 50 veeeeeeeeeery long years.
Banjo: (Brings Kazooie a glass of water, then has to make 9 trips to bring all the bottles over to Kazooie's bed, hears a knock on door)
Kazooie: Open the door, you furry lump! In my day, blah blah blah blah blah blah.
Banjo: We were young at the same time Kazooie. (Moves toward door, begins to open)
Kazooie: Were we now, no we weren't you little ol' whippersnapper, in my day blah blah blah.
Mumbo: (Enters house with a walker) Gr-greetings Bear and Bird.
Kazooie: Speak up sonny, in my day.....
Narrator: Yes, time had taken it's toll on our heroes.
Mumbo: (Crashes to the floor asleep)
Banjo: (Attempts to close door, Mumbo is blocking it, shrugs and tries to turn around, but collapses in pain)
Narrator: Although no one could answer it, and the door was open, the mailman still knocks.
Kazooie: What's that, you call that knocking, look here sonny, in my day......
Mailman: Err....... I have a telegram for Banjo, Kazooie, or Mumbo.
Narrator: Kazooie continued to blah, Banjo was in too much pain to do anything, and Mumbo was dreaming of his golden days....
Bottles: (Walks up leaning on cane) Hello there Postman!
Mailman: Umm... telegram?
Bottles: What's that? (Doesn't realize his hearing aid is off)
Banjo: (Raises himself up) I-I-I-I'll take it there sonny.
Mailman: Don't call me sonny!
Banjo: (Takes telegram) Whatever you say sonny, heh heh.
Kazooie: I'll call you sonny if I want, in my day......
Bottles: What are you saying!
Banjo: Bottles, turn your hearing aid on.
Bottles: Eh?
Narrator: Can we get on with the story?
Banjo: Sure.
Kazooie: I guess, but in my day.....
Mumbo: (wakes up) Ok.
Bottles: Eh?
Mailman: (defensively) It wasn't my fault.
Narrator: Just read the telegram Banjo.
Banjo: (reads) Oh, it seems the Dingos need saving.
Narrator: Everyone attempted to jump for joy, and ends up writhing in pain, except for Bottles who says "Eh?".
Banjo: I guess I'll just call for my grandson Fiddle.
Fiddle: Hello everyone!
Kazooie: Hello? Hello? In my day....
Bottles: (leaves, convinced that noone will talk to him)
Banjo: Fiddle, go save the Dingos, that's a good lad.
Fiddle: err......................
Kazooie: Do what Banjo tells you, in my day.......
Banjo: Look Fiddle, you're 9 now, and you haven't saved the world once!
Mailman: This is a crazy house! (Runs very quickly, letters pouring out of his bag)
Mumbo: Hmmph, Bear and Bird no need for me, here Fiddle, I'll grant you some basic moves.
Fiddle: (Now knows: Roar, Bite, Long Jump, Swimming (Above Water), and Climb.)
Narrator: Aliens suddenly land, and steal the record of Elvis.
Zeldakid555: Now who's straying from the story, huh? You're fired, Bill Clinton will take over for you.
Bill Clinton: At this point, Mumbo leaves, Kazooie loses her voice (although she continues to silently move her mouth), and Banjo develops a severe pain in the neck.
Fiddle: Um... goodbye everyone.
Kazooie: (attempts to launch into a tirade of noise)
Fiddle: (Runs away very quickly)
Bill Clinton: Tune in next time for more of "Fiddle's
Faddle with Monsters"!!!