Disclaimer: I own nothing. I do not own That '70s Show or any of its characters. I do not own the song that this story is named after and loosely based off of. I do not own George Strait who sings the wonderful song. I do not own any other TV or movie character, reference, or anything like that that is mentioned in this story. I own nothing!

Author's Note: Hello everyone! How are you all? Hope you're doing well and staying warm in this chilly weather. Today I have for you a short little RK story that I hope you all will enjoy. It takes place sometime in season 6 any time after Squeeze Box, it could even be early 7or later as long as Pam is there. Like many of you the Pam Burkhart storyline was not my favorite it especially irked me the way that Hyde *and* Red were googly eyed with her too. It was completely out of character for them both. Hyde would have told Pam something about her abandoning Jackie and Red had always said and shown that he only had eyes for Kitty. Now I know there are stories that correct Hyde's behavior but I wanted to correct Red's. Then I heard this song 'My Heart Won't Wander Very Far Front You' from the King of Country George Strait months back and instantly thought it fit with RK and the whole Pam thing. I'd just been looking for the time and opportunity to write it out and I figured now would be best. Hopefully you don't hate it or me for doing yet another RK oneshot with a George Strait song and if you do hopefully you'll keep from leaving anything to harsh in the review section, it is my birthday! Now you see why I wanted to post this story today. lol Birthday kinda blocks the hate…or at least I'm hoping it will…plus I wanted to do a little something to be able to celebrate my day with you all too and hopefully keep me busy, it's a good day but a sad day too…but enough of that! This could also be used as a little hint to those looking for a last minute birthday gift for me *wink wink* Thanks for stopping by to read, I hope you like it, please review if you can, I'd love to hear your thoughts, and as always, Enjoy!

My Heart Won't Wander Very Far From You

It was an ordinary Friday afternoon at the Forman house.

Red was seated in his usual spot at the kitchen table, reading his newspaper from that same morning. He hadn't been able to read the complete issue during breakfast thanks to the fact that he had been sharing the table with a group of locusts who were either eating his food or arguing over which were better; pancakes or waffles? But the dumbasses were gone now which meant that Red could now read his paper in peace.

Or so he thought.

"Red, honey," Kitty called as she entered the room and walked towards him, "the kids just left to their out of town concert which means they won't be home till late tonight; so I thought we could turn this evening into an evening of romance." She giggled with excitement before going into further detail, "We could go out to dinner, come home and have some wine, and then maybe go upstairs and…rearrange the bedroom furniture."

Kitty's eyebrows rose up and her lips pressed close together, making it clear that the last suggestion was code for something else. However, whether Red had cracked Kitty's code or not was a bit unclear since he never looked her way.

"Can't." he replied, eyes still on the newspaper, "We're having company over for dinner."

Hearing this, Kitty's brows dropped into a frown, "I didn't invite anyone for dinner."

"I know you didn't, I did." Red informed, at last making eye contact with his wife.

An appalled look appeared on Kitty's face when she heard Red's announcement, she couldn't believe her ears. She was so shocked by the information that she couldn't find her words and instead just stared at him, blinking her eyes in disbelief.

"You invited people over?" she asked but waited for no answer, "You don't talk to people, Red. How could you invite people over?"

Red shrugged, "I just thought it would be nice to have some friends over for dinner and drinks."

His wife eyed him carefully. This was so unlike Red, inviting people over for dinner, talking to people about them coming to dinner, and was that a smile on his face? He was actually excited about having company over! Suddenly Kitty had a realization and her shock died off becoming replaced by a look of annoyance as her hands went onto her hips.

"Uh huh." she nodded, sounding like she understood but was not very happy about it, "And by that you meant it would be nice to have Pam Burkhart over for dinner and drinks."

"See, you think so too!" Red pointed out with his grin still in place.

Kitty shook her head while looking upwards. She wanted to tell him so many things about how immature his behavior was when Pam Burkhart around or even just mentioned, but she knew that would only cause a fight and she didn't want the evening to be spent fighting almost as much as she didn't want it to be spent with that flighty woman. So Kitty opted to take another approach.

"Red," Kitty said, her tone softer and her hands now off her hips and clasped together in front of her, "I was really looking forward to spending the evening with you."

"And you will." He tried to assure, "It'll be an evening with just you and me and Pam."

"And Bob." Kitty made sure to throw in—he better not have just invited Pam over by herself.

Just those two little words caused Red's long lasting smile to vanish, "Oh right, Bob. He's probably gonna wanna come too."

Opening her mouth to protest Kitty was soon cut off by a tapping on the glass of the sliding door. Red turned around with a frown indented on his forehead until he saw who it was and his frown quickly turned upside down, his newspaper was quickly disregarded on the table so he could actually wave the person in!

Smiling her own smile Pamela Burkhart pushed open the door and stuck her tanned face into the Forman kitchen, making sure her low cut, snug fitting top could be seen too. If the expression on Red's face was any indication, the blouse and anything under it could be seen just fine. Kitty wasn't sure which of the two's behavior played the bigger role behind her eye roll.

"Knock, knock!" Pam greeted happily, despite the fact that she'd already opened the door after actually knocking! "Bobbie sent me over here to see if there was anything you needed us to bring over to dinner tonight."

Red continued to grin, "Nope, just bring yourself."

"Okay, will do!" she cheerfully replied, "I think I'll even wear my red dress just for you, Red since your name is Red and all. Ta!"

The already large smile on Red's face seemed to have doubled as he lifted up an open palm to wave the pretty woman off. Once Pam was gone Red looked over at Kitty, still smiling happily; but because Kitty knew the reason behind that smile she did not smile back.

"Did you hear that, Kitty? She's wearing her red dress because my name' Red. That's pretty clever, huh?" He said sounding almost proud.

"Uh huh. I heard. Now you hear this, Red Forman!"

Kitty turned on her heel and then stormed out of the kitchen through the swinging door. She pushed the door so forcefully that after she'd disappeared into the living room the door continued to swiftly swing back and forth. Red only frowned at the scene, he saw her leave and yes the door was still moving but what did she want him to hear?

"It was supposed to slam!" Kitty shouted from the next room; she'd been so angry in her exit she forgot the swinging door wouldn't stay shut nor would it make the noise needed to help express her anger.

Red sighed, "Kitty." he said as he pushed himself out of his seat and followed her steps—though in a much calmer manner—into the living room.

When Red entered the room he found Kitty seated at the far left side of the sofa with her arms once again folded over her chest. He couldn't exactly see her face because she was staring, maybe even glaring, out the large window behind the organ but because of the way she had her legs crossed and how her right foot appeared to be rapidly tapping against the air Red could tell she was upset.

"Kitty, look I'm sorry I invited people over here without telling you first." Red said as she sat beside her, but leaving a small gap between them just in case, "But to be fair you do that to me all the time."

She swung her head around to glare at her husband, "Red, I am not upset because you invited people over." she explained shaking her head slightly, "I'm upset because you invited her over here."

"Her?' Red repeated in a more puzzled tone of voice, "You mean Pam?"

"Yes Pam!" Kitty replied her aggravation become more and more obvious, "You know Pam isn't even her real name. It's Pamela. Pam is her nickname and it's not even a cute nickname. I have a cute nickname. You know what Pam is? Cooking spray! That's right you're making googly eyes at cooking spray!"

Red could only smirk at his wife's outburst, "You're jealous."

"I am not." she replied defensively but soon found that she couldn't keep that front up; she sighed, "Maybe a little. But I can't help it, Red. The way you look at her it's like the way flies are attracted to those lights in bug zappers. And you know what happens when those flies get too close to those lights? They get zapped and they die!"

A chuckle escaped Red's lips which made Kitty's glare deepen.

"This isn't funny, Red. I'm really upset!" She declared.

"Why?" he asked and before Kitty could explode on him again he continued on, "Weren't you the one who once told me you knew I would never stray because I had too much character?"

Kitty's star softened at that reminder, "Well yes, I did. And I meant it. I trust you, Red….I just…I don't trust Pam." She tried to explain giving a small sigh then going on, "And besides when I said those things it was when a teenage girl had a crush on you. I knew you would never leave me for some teenager but this is Pamela Burkhart. She and I are only a few years apart but she's all pretty and tanned while I'm here looking…"

"Beautiful." Red finished for her.

Giving him a sideways look, Kitty scoffed, "Oh you are gonna have to do a lot more than that to get out of this dog house."

Red smirked, looking as if he were accepting her challenge but the truth was he really did want to settle these jealous and insecure feelings that his wife was currently battling and displaying. He scooted closer to her, closing up that small gap from before, and took it as a good sign when she didn't move away.

"Kitty, I don't need a ballroom queen like Pam, I've got you."

As soon as the words were said Kitty's eyes widened in a not good surprised kind of way and Red instantly knew that the words said aloud did not sound as good as they did in his head.

He tried again.

"Look Kitty, you and I have been through a lot. Good times and tough times. And during those hard times, I never could've made it through them with anyone but you." he told her moving his arm around her shoulder when he noticed that the scowl on her face had started to melt away. He gave her a smirk before continuing, "You're the only one who can calm me down when I get angry, you scratch my back right where it itches, you can stretch out our lousy paychecks to cover all the bills and expenses and still managed to save a little aside. You're the one that made this three bedroom house into a castle, complete with one too many dumbass jesters."

By now Kitty's arms had unfolded and a smile had begun to inch its way onto her lips; she even let out the tiniest of giggles at the last thing Red said.

"Pam Burkhart could never do any of that. You're much tougher than her. You're much more beautiful than her. You're much more than her, Kitty." When Red saw that Kitty seemed to be less angry, he decide to give it a shot and try to make his point from before. "See Pam may be pretty to look at and all but she never shows me nearly enough…"

Kitty's eyes widened into large saucers, her smile long gone without leaving a trace of it behind "You've already seen the woman topless! For heaven's sake Red how much more do you want to see?"

"A lot more. But not in that way!" He made sure to clear up as soon as possible, "I'll admit, Pam is easy on the eyes but she never does things that I've seen you do, things that when I see you do them I fall more and more in love with you."

"Staying up all night to take care of our sick kids, straightening out my fishing tackle box even when I say it's fine the way it is, making me my favorite meal for dinner on days that have been tough at work. I've never seen Pam Burkhart do any of those things." Red told Kitty, his arm becoming a bit tighter around her, "And till I do my heart won't wander very far from you."

A tight smile stretched onto Kitty's lips, "Oh Red."

"And you know Pam and the way she is…"Red added on, "So it looks like you'll be stuck with me and this old heart of mine for a long, long time."

"Good." Kitty said with a nod of her head, her smile growing more, "Because I love you and that old heart of yours."

The corner of Red's mouth twitched up into a smirk, "I love you too."

That was the last thing he said before pressing his lips against his wife's. The kiss was soft but before it could turn into anything more, Red slowly pulled away; he hated moving out of the embrace and leaving Kitty's lips, but there was still something he had to say to her.

"And I'm sorry, Kitty." he said looking at her and then moving his gaze downwards, "I'm sorry if whenever we were around Pam I acted like well…"

"The kids?" Kitty finished for him.

Red's head shot back up and on it was deep set in frown, "I was gonna say a bit of a dumbass, what you said is even worse that's a full on dumbass."

Kitty shrugged her shoulder's in a sort of 'if the shoe fits' kind of way and Red sighed before continuing.

"The point is, I'm sorry if I made you feel inferior to Pam and made you doubt for one second that you're my best girl." his tone was soft and sincere as he continued on, "I'll try to watch myself around Pam but I can't make any promises." Red made sure Kitty understood this, "But I want you to know that no matter what happens or what I do, I'll always be the man in love with you."

"Oh Red." cooed Kitty before she leaned in to give her husband another loving kiss.

They continued their kiss for a few more seconds, the only thing on their mind was each other. And maybe one other little thought…

"I wasn't that bad was I?" Red asked after suddenly breaking the kiss to look at Kitty with a frown that didn't show his disbelief but rather his anger at himself for acting in such a way and not being able to notice it.

A slight giggle left Kitty, "Shut up and finish kissing me."

Not having to be told twice Red moved in to capture her lips in another tender kiss that lasted a little longer. Then slowly Red pulled away, bringing the kiss to an end but keeping his arm around Kitty and looking at her with a mischievous smirk and a certain gleam in his eyes. Kitty couldn't help but let out another school girl giggle when she saw his expression—she'd missed seeing him look at her like that.

"What do you say we cancel on Pam and Bob and give your evening of romance a chance?" he suggested to her.

She was tempted but knew it wouldn't be wise, "Red, they're right next door. They're bound to either see or hear us when we leave out to dinner."

"So we'll stay in."

"They can see us through the doors in the kitchen. They'll see us anytime we're in there or anywhere downstairs." Kitty was quick to remind.

"So then we'll just stay upstairs." Red spoke the words as if they were that simple and then went on to explain a little more, "I'll tell them we can't have people over because you're not feeling good and you're gonna spend the rest of the night in bed."

Kitty didn't look very convinced, "Uh huh, which means I'll be stuck spending the evening upstairs in bed alone."

"No one said you'd have to be in there alone." He said, that smirk and gleam reappearing as his eyebrows moved upwards, "Didn't you say something about moving around the bedroom furniture."

"I did. And you know, I don't know exactly where I want things so we may be up there for a quite a while." Kitty said, playing along and wearing her own smile.

Red chuckled and Kitty giggled and soon the couple was on their feet and hurrying over to an exit in the room. However it wasn't until Kitty was on the second step of the staircase that she found that Red wasn't in his usual spot behind her but rather heading for the swinging door they'd both come through moments before.

"You go on upstairs, I'll be right there." Red called to her.

She frowned and didn't move, "Where're you going?"

"I'm gonna go tell Bob and Pam dinner's off." he explained, "The last thing we need is Bob barging in here looking for food, it'll be like that damn cartoon bear that goes after those picnic baskets."

"Red."

He stopped in his tracks and turned around to look at Kitty, "What?"

Kitty stared back at Red, not sure of what to say. If this scene had happened hours or even several minutes before, Kitty would have accompanied him to the Pinciotii house to make sure her husband didn't lose track of time by gawking at Pam Burkhart; she might have even declared that the moment was over and grabbed a bottle of wine before taking off upstairs and slamming the bedroom door shut.

But this scene wasn't taking place minutes before, it was taking place now. Now after just having a conversation where Red finally understood how out of character he was acting around Pamela Burkhart and Kitty was reassured of how much she was loved by her husband and had nothing to worry about.

A smile crept onto her lips, "Don't take too long."

"I'll be holding you in my arms before you know it." Red replied, returning the smile.

One more loving look was shared between the two before they each hurried off in the separate directions. They knew it would only be a few minutes before they were back in the same room but both Red and Kitty were excited for when they could be alone and begin their evening of romance together.

The End

Author's Note: So what did you think? Good? Bad? Ugly? Lemme know what you think!

Again thanks for stopping by to read and celebrate a bit. It really means a lot! Be sure to grab some cake and candy on the way out!

Oo and an extra cookie to those who can spot the second George Strait song title used in the story. Hint it's used as a piece of Red's dialogue. God luck and thanks again!

Until next time, thanks for reading, hope you liked, please review and lemme know what you think, take care, and have a nice day!