Gordan Freeman was quite happy when he convinced his brother, John Freeman, to switch jobs with him. Gordan detested his job. He had a degree from MIT and what does he spend his day doing? Pushing carts loaded with hazardous chemicals and specimens. Not a good job indeed.

Gordan now worked in the Quantum Mechanics labs of the Black Mesa research facility. His new job was to calculate the odds of accidents occurring within the facility.

Odds of a power outage: 6763816774724.32872436 : 1

Odds of a super conductor exploding 15645725347: 1

Odds of a Resonance Cascade 9999999999999999648362359562123452658574: 1

One day however, through a means still unknown, Gordan was suddenly teleported out of his universe and appeared in another.

He looked around and saw that the universe was made out of pillows and nerf-foam. He noticed the munchkin village and the teddy bear cupcake shop and realized this place may not be too bad. Then monsters came out and tried to attack him! Gordon reached for his knife, only to find that it transmorffilded into a kitten! Gordan swung the kitty all over the place, hacking limbs off with the kittens adorable little claws. The monsters too were made only of soft cottony fluffyness.

He then went up to the aforementioned Teddy Bear cupcake shop and asked for the history of this world. The Teddy Bear then spun this awesome tale of fluff and honor.

"In the begging there were two nations, the Democratic Republic of the Cats and the Soviet Socialist Republics of the Dogs. The two nations fought a devastating war with their ICNH's (InterContinental Ballistic Hippopotamuses). The cuddly exchange attracted a race of beings known as the Combines, who now rule our planet of Fuzzy Wuzzy World."

Then Gordan asked, "Do these combines have multidimensional technology?"

To which the bear replied, "Yes, of course they do."

Gordan then busted into a Combine lab and killed all the fuzzy alien fascists within. He then used their technology to go back to his own universe. Upon his arrival, he discovered that he was sent forward in time! However, in this universe John Freeman was the legendary hero who destroyed the oppressive combine regime. So he went back in time and killed John Freeman when he was still an infant. Thus Gordan became the hero, but Baby Gordan promised vengence to his fallen brother and comrade. Once he got old enough, he went back in time to stop himself from killing John Freeman, but when he went back John Freeman also went back in time to stop his brother from killing him. So Gordan Freeman went back in time to kill himself so he would never be able to do that, but John had beaten him there so Gordan Freeman went back in time to kill his own mother. So John Freeman went back in time toiasdgkasgnksda gjweioagjwerajp'eargp ijaehnoai gioeraghuera gjo;eah g;ebnaguahdfghao;gj fagjio;jerkoag jw] DFGIGJHQOGISGFHI GSHAIWGJ0[UT3489034682368139684816971=9-6834178T94386=3168139991

ERROR ERROR ERROR!

Hello every one. G-man here... I am a fraid that I will have to fix this mess. I will do my best... but there are no prom ises. Af-ter all, this a peers to be worse than your a verage time para dox. It appears to be a complete time fuck up.

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John Freeman who was Gordon Freemans brother was one day in an office typing on a computer. He got an email from his brother that said that aliens and monsters were attacking his place and aksed him for help so he went.

John Freeman got his computer shut down and wet on the platform to go up to the roof of the building where he left his motorcycle and normal people close because he was in his office lab coat. John Freeman got on his motorcycl and said "its time for me to live up to my family name and face full life consequences" so he had to go.

And that my friends, is how the universe of Half Life: Full Life consequences came to be.