Will Graham was no stranger to pain; one could even say it was an old friend of his. As long as he could remember there had been one form or another of pain had been present in his life, his childhood had been filled with pain; the pain of hunger, the pain of being different, the pain of being alone, the pain of loosing your only family member. As he had gotten older the amount of pain hadn't changed, though the causes of it had, but he had gotten better at ignoring it. The pain of being stabbed, of being mocked, of being shot, imprisoned, all of it had hurt but he'd thought he was used to it by now. He was wrong; nothing he had been through before had caused him as much pain as he was in now, lying on the floor of Hannibal's home, one hand clutched to his stomach in an attempt to keep himself from bleeding to death; it was pure agony.
Physical pain wasn't the only pain he was in, the sheer weight of guilt was pressing down heavily on him, once again he had failed in his attempts to protect people. At this very moment Alanna was lying outside possibly dying or maybe even already dead, he had no clue where exactly jack was or if he was even still alive, and Abigail… Will slowly turned his head to look at the girl in question, ignoring the pain that shot through his body at the movement as he fumbled to place his hands on her neck once again, desperately attempted to stop the blood that gushed from it.
God, it hadn't even occurred to him that she could still be alive; he'd just assumed that she was dead; that the lack of a body and Hannibal shoving her ear down his throat had meant that she'd been eaten. He should have considered the fact that she might still be alive, especially after Miriam Lass had been found alive; she had been proof that finding a body part didn't necessarily mean someone was dead. He hadn't considered it though and now look what had happened, once again she was lying on the floor with her neck slashed open, only this time there was no backup to help her. By the time the ambulance he had called for Alanna got there it would most likely be too late, his efforts were hardly doing anything to stop the blood flow and thanks to his own wound he wouldn't have the strength to keep putting pressure on her much longer.
He was already feeling faint, it was doubtful that he'd be able to stay conscious very much longer and once he was out, well, he had no clue if he'd ever wake up again. It was strange, he'd known going into this that there was a chance he could die and at the time he hadn't be that afraid. But now, now that death was staring him in the face, now that it was hovering anxiously above both him and people he had come to care about; right now he was terrified. Most of the fear wasn't due to the thought that he very likely was going to die, no, he was afraid that he might live. That somehow against all the odds he would survive but that everyone else; Jack, Alanna, Abigail, that they would all die, that was the thing that scared him most.
It had been so much easier back when his dogs were the only ones he cared about, his dogs, who was going to take care of them if he died? There needed to be someone to feed them and play with them and...and….It occurred to Will that his thoughts were wandering erratically and as that realization occurred he also became aware of how rabid his breathing had become and the way his vision was beginning to fade. Without even meaning to, his blood-soaked fingers slipped from Abigail's neck down to the hard wood floor.
As his eyes involuntary began to close he thought he heard the echoing sound of footsteps coming towards him and the shouting of urgent voices. His last thought before he faded into unconsciousness was that he hoped they weren't too late.