Disclaimer: I own nothing, nor do I claim to. All characters with the exception of Sam (and other original characters) belong to Michael Crichton and other respective owners. This story is written for entertainment purposes only, and I make NO money off of this whatsoever. I am in not in any way affiliated with any party who is associated with anything related to "Jurassic park".
The song featured is called "Think of me" By Mark Schultz and does not belong to me, and all lyrics are the property and copyright of their respective rights holders.
Author's note: this is a bit of a song-fic, and a one-shot meant to spark interest in a potential story should people like this one.
Think of me
"Packing my bags this morning was the hardest thing to do…"
Today was the day. The day Dr. Alan Grant's dig in the Badlands of Montana was completed. For now, anyway. It was time to take a sabbatical, well if compiling data alone in his home office was considered a sabbatical. He was an introvert at heart, loving his time alone, reading a periodical about his chosen field, paleontology, or sitting on his porch with a cup of Earl Grey while looking out over the mountains. It was unlike him to dread leaving a dig on the account of missing his companions. Many things were beginning to change for him. He didn't plan to be taken by surprise, but then again, who did?
The light from the rising sun was just beginning to pierce the darkness of night. He shook his head, and his weathered hands picked up a brown leather-bound book, now worn from extensive reading. It was strange how a book could change his life. The universe was now a more mysterious, and beautiful place than he ever really hoped for. What he thought he was so sure about was beginning to fade to grey. He placed the book gently into his suitcase. He seemed to be packing at a glacial pace now, thinking of the one who "accidentally" misplaced it in his trailer after a group dinner. It would be especially hard to say goodbye to her.
She, Samantha Jordan Frasier was twenty-seven year old New Zealand native who just completed her Masters in communications, but was taking Paleontology in the interest of deciphering whether their could be a bridge between the theory of Intelligent design, and the scientific field. To say he took to the young woman right away would be wrong, because they butted heads almost immediately. Not due to clash of personalities, but of ideals and methods. It was always overshadowed though by her belief that it was better to respect him, than fight to get her point across. The realization didn't come without considerable clashes with her peers over her belief in intelligent design, instead of a random copulation of cells producing life. He often saw her pry herself away from the group, pacing the ground, seemingly muttering to herself. Her eyes often looked pained, and he couldn't help but feel sorry for her. Being a quite social creature, it hurt to have rifts between colleagues. His mouth turned up in a grimace when he thought of how some of her peers, including his respected protégé, Billy, ripped into her unexpectedly. What was supposed to be a friendly dinner quickly turned tense. He knew now that some were threatened, and others too quick to label, on both sides. He quickly ended the confrontation by asking Sam to leave the site for a while. He remembered the shock and disappointment in her eyes, and to this day he still felt the sting. Whether she was wrong was irrelevant if he, or they, forgot she was a person. He regretted not reminding them of that. It was just like humankind, to try to control what they could not explain.
Finally, the last of his possessions was placed in his suitcase. He looked around the now empty trailer, and sighed. He used to never dread leaving a dig site before, at least not for the reasons he had now. It had probably been of the of most successful digs in a few years, with over ten specimens found in remarkably good condition, and the students under him were as passionate as ever. He ran a shaky hand through his light brown hair, and headed out the trailer door, with his suitcase in hand.
The morning air was still cool in the Montana desert, but he knew that would soon change. A barrage of warm colors started penetrating the sky, breaking up the dark blues of the night sky. He strode forward to Billy's trailer. He knocked on the door, and it wasn't long before the man stood in front of him. Billy was an attractive young man with brown hair in his late twenties, with an athletic build. He was intelligent, but sometimes overenthusiastic to the point of foolishness.
"Hey, I just wanted to say goodbye before I left." Alan said, trying to sound light-hearted.
"Yeah, I hoped you would." Billy said after a few moments of silence. "Let me know if you're ever in the area again, or are speaking somewhere." Billy said with fidgeting hands. He didn't know whether Alan would prefer shake his hand or hug him goodbye. Certainly after what they had been through nine months ago on Isla Sorna a hug wasn't out of the question. He opted to extend his hand and then pulled him in a for a quick embrace, with his suitcase still in hand. Alan then released him and patted his shoulder curtly.
"Don't be a stranger, you know how to contact me. Do you know if the girls are up yet?" he asked, before turning away. "The girls", were Jessica and Samantha, two young women in their expedition. The two women were about the same age, and roomed together in a trailer about a hundred feet from Billy's. Jessica had been on digs with him before, and helped Sam get acclimated to the certain politics and challenges of keeping a dig running smoothly.
"Yeah, I think so." Billy answered though he knew full well they were probably up, and anticipating his goodbyes. Especially Samantha, because as much as Dr. Grant clashed with her in the beginning, everyone could see the budding respect, and teamwork. Some whispered it may be more, but Billy knew better. Sam was a perceptive young woman, who, while outgoing and witty, would never cross a professional boundary, if his own experiences could vouch for her. Dr. Grant was also not the kind to easily fall for someone, especially someone so young studying under him.
"…packing my bags was so easy, compared to standing outside your door to say goodbye to you…"
"Thanks, Billy." he said while he strode across the sand laden ground to the trailer he knew Sam, and her roommate Jessie shared. The morning light was quickly growing stronger surrounding the ground with a glow and highlighted the place he was dreading going. They too would be leaving soon, with talks of getting a place together, or so he heard. This part was the hardest of all, and his shoes felt like they were full of lead, weighing down each step. Each seemed to take an eternity. He rubbed the back of his neck with his free hand and took a deep breath as he saw the light in their trailer come on. Did they know he was coming? Before he knew it he was there. It was real. He was leaving. He was leaving them behind. He was leaving her behind. A second after he rapt on the metal door, it swung open. A young dark haired woman stood there in a blue cotton button up shirt and light boot cut jeans. He looked and saw it was Jessie. The pretty freckled woman smiled sadly, and turned halfway around to announce he was there. An odd wave of emotion flowed though his veins as he heard Samantha's voice reply. He figured out was it was as she stepped into the doorway; he would miss her. Her down turned brown eyes were smiling, but only sadly. She was simply clad in a white tank top under a dark green over shirt, and khaki walking shorts. She folded her arms in front of her as if a sudden chill in the air inspired the movement.
Samantha's eyes drifted to his face slowly, and she was almost sure both her roommate and Dr. Grant sensed her hesitancy. She offered a small smile, unsure of what to say. Her friendship with the professor had changed from a reluctant respect, to a surprising camaraderie. It had become more than she expected and she was thankful for his mercy on her. He could of soon written her off as a naïve Intelligent design adherent, but he had made the effort to actually ask her questions, and get inside her head. She knew he often observed her when she took her evening walks close to camp, thinking, praying, journaling, as well as when she socialized with the others. He grew surprisingly sympathetic whenever she didn't have a concrete answer to one of his questions. She thought it was pity at first, but with the help of the others on their team, she realized it was a budding respect.
The way he was standing in front of her now, his face looked strange to her.
"So, I guess this is goodbye." she said finally, fiddling with her hair that was contained in a long braid. To drag the moment out seemed useless. He nodded and averted his gaze from hers for a moment. A flash of emotion moved through his facial features, and the normally clear blue eyes turned a stormy shade of blue-gray.
"Yes, it is. I hope your plans in the city go as planned." he said, with a awkward smile. "Have you found an apartment yet?"
"We're looking into a few." Jessie chimed in, placing her hand gently on her friend's shoulder. This was certainly a whole lot harder than she thought, as Sam looked almost unglued at the realization that Alan was leaving. They had known for weeks that he would leave, and all the crew would go their separate ways. Some were going to complete their education, and others were searching for jobs in universities, and even petroleum companies.
"You have everything you need to make it to your home alright, right?" Sam asked, taking a step down from doorway. Her movement made him unconsciously shift his weight from one foot to the other.
"Yes, yes, everything is in order." He said. His face warmed at her concern, but his eyes seemed to warn her as to not get too close. He couldn't take it. "In the future I hope to hear you both are doing well. You are both very bright students and it's really, truly been an honor to work with you."
Sam didn't reply, but her eyes seemed to say "thank you" in her awkward way. She watched as Jessica (Jessie) stepped down from the trailer and said a brief goodbye, patting him lightly on the shoulder before moving away. Alan looked back at Sam whose gaze was lingering on the ground in front of her feet.
"Goodbye Miss Frasier." he said quietly. It felt like a steel door being brought between them, slamming with jarring intensity. Her head lifted, and he thought he could see her eyes tearing up, but they were blinked back by dark eyelashes.
"Goodbye, Dr. Grant." she said simply. To bid her goodbye with her last name seemed cold to her, so she answered him with the same, and it hurt. The ache in her chest seemed to grow and made her face grow hot. After all this time was he just going to address her so coldly? Not that he would see it that way. "Professional" is what he would call it, and maybe he was right. Sam mentally kicked herself for being so irrational.
Alan nodded, his lips forcing a small smile before turning around and walking toward his faded red pick-up truck. "That didn't go as planned", he thought, but maybe it was better that way. He had found himself thinking of Sam far too often lately to be considered a "professional" interest. A thought dropped into his head then, that questioned whether that was just what a friendship felt like. A friendship that rattled his normally contained world and turned it upside down. Every day he was challenged and pushed, sometimes subtly and sometimes blatantly. He finally reached his truck, and moved to fish out it's keys from his pant's pocket.
Sam watched as Alan walked away, and her throat closed tightly. This did not go unnoticed by her roommate.
"Easy there, Sam. It's not like he's going away to die, you know." she joked. Sam let out a slight chuckle, but the lump in her throat grew larger. Jessie frowned and wrapped her arms around Sam's shoulders. "He must remind you of your father, huh?" she asked, only half expecting an answer. Sam didn't answer, just sighed, and squeezed Jessie's arms. Sam's eyes were now fixed on the faint figure of the Alan closing the driver side door. The engine revved, and something in Sam snapped.
"I'll be right back." she said stoically, pulling herself away from Jessie. She didn't care how she looked right now, so it made it easy to break into a run as Alan's car moved forward. She couldn't let him leave without giving him some indication that she'd remember him, and think of him. He couldn't think she hadn't left a mark on her. She prayed that he wouldn't speed up too much for her catch him.
Alan pressed the gas petal down and the car moved forward. He made a cautionary glace in the rear view mirror, and that's when he saw her. She was running, and he thought he heard her shout. He quickly turned the wheel slightly and stopped the car. What could the matter? Why drag the goodbye out longer? It seemed futile to revel in the emotion of the moment. Discomfort rose within him, but not from her display, but of his hesitance to let it happen.
He turned off the engine and opened his door. It wasn't long before he say Sam slow her run. The light from the sun lit her from behind showed him the emotion in her face. The sadness that shone in it took him aback, yet he jumped out of the seat of his car and sped into a jog. After a few strides he was within earshot.
" …I know you've never seen me cry but it's so hard to say goodbye…"
"Samantha, what's wrong?" he called.
"I'm sorry Dr. Grant." she said, biting her lip. "Alan." She said hoping she wasn't being too forward, but he had used her name this time.
"What for?" he asked. Tears stung at his eyes as her emotion filled face came closer.
"For not giving the goodbye you deserve." she stated. "You've been such an encouragement. You assisted me when some of the others didn't want to speak to me, much less help me. I, I can't thank you enough quite frankly. I really can't. Just know that I believe we were meant to be friends." At that word long held back tears fell from her eyes. Alan watched powerlessly as they fell down her tanned cheeks. He reached in his pocket and pulled out a red bandana. He extended it to her, she chuckled and took it. As she wiped her face, she suddenly felt foolish to let herself be swept away by the goodbye.
"Thanks."
"You're welcome." he said, looking at her. He wasn't aware of the tears that were forming in his own eyes. He only noticed them when Sam expression noted it. She had never seen him cry before. She had seen him laugh numerous times, as he had quite a sense of humor, but sadness was something she'd never seen him express with tears.
"…(Think of me)…what can I say to show you I'll never give up on you..."
Sam stepped forward without a sound and embraced him. He embraced her back, hesitantly, wrapping his arms around her and squeezing her shoulders lightly. A strange foreign feeling rolled through him, but it felt good. He brushed his head past hers lightly then pulled back. He couldn't ignore the appearance of what they were doing. An older man with an attractive young woman, exchanging an emotional goodbye. He pulled back not for his reputation, but for hers. He knew Sam would understand and she didn't resist him letting her go. She stepped back a few steps and smiled shyly. He motioned for her to stay where she was, and strode off to this car. He entered his car, and looked to be searching for something. Her eyes strained to see what he was doing. He was rifling through the glove compartment now, carefully as to not upset his order of them. He seemed to find what he needed, and turned back to her. She walked to him despite his urging to stay where she was. He held a pen and paper, but nothing solid to write on. This was something he soon noticed with a furrowed brow. Sam chuckled, and pointed back to the truck. He shrugged playfully and they walked over to the truck where he set the paper down on the hood and quickly scribbled something down. He handed it to her and she grasped it curiously. Her eyes moved over the paper. It was an address and phone number. She had no reason to believe it was anything else but his.
"Why?" she asked. Her eyes were just as puzzled as her voice made her sound.
"…I know God sent you as a friend, I know He'll bring you back again…"
"Because I'm not willing to end this chapter this way. I'm not going to give up on everything new I've learned…" he paused looking away distractedly. "…the things I've experienced I can't explain right now."
Sam nodded, sympathy shining in her eyes. The past few months had shaken him.
"I'm not willing to give up on you either." he continued. "I hope you'll keep in touch." It was an odd thing to see, him so vulnerable but she wouldn't chide him for it. It was a gift rarely given but to a select few. She unconsciously held the note to her chest while she waited for the inevitable words. "Goodbye, Miss Frasier." he said with a smile that warmed what some would call a cold farewell.
"Goodbye Dr. Grant." she said, squeezing the paper in her hands. She watched as the sunlight framed his form as he walked away again towards his truck. He stepped into the truck, shut the door, and waved his hat as a final farewell gesture. She heard shouts behind her, and turned quickly to see many of the others waving. She smiled sadly, turned back as Alan's truck's engine revved, and the wheels began to turn. Bittersweet feelings coursed through her as she watched the red truck pull away. It kicked up a cloud dust behind it as it traveled over the desert landscape. She watched until the vehicle disappeared into the horizon.
Alan had driven far enough that he could scarcely see the camp site anymore, and his minds was awash with thoughts. Whether he'd see her again he wasn't sure, but it wouldn't be because he didn't want her around. Amongst his thoughts in the coming days he knew a certain student would occupy them.
So what did you think? Please read and review. I hoped you in some way liked it, but that's what a review is for. Please refrain from flaming, but give kind, constructive criticism. This is my first attempt at "Jurassic Park" fan fiction.