A story for October, Breast Cancer Awareness month, and my 450th story. The song used, Martina McBride's I'm Gonna Love You Through It, is not mine. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: Not mine!
PsychPsychPsychPsychPsych
"Jude, stop pulling your sister's hair right now!" Juliet O'Hara called from her kitchen.
Her youngest son, Michael, came into the kitchen with a picture clutched in his little hands. "Look, Mommy. I made this for you!" he said, beaming.
"Oh, that's beautiful, baby." She knelt down and hugged him tightly, then took the picture and stuck it on the refrigerator with a magnet. "Thank you."
Proud, Michael dashed back to the kitchen table.
Amid all the chaos of a Monday morning, the phone started to ring. Shawn was in the shower, so she quickly grabbed it and answered. "Hello?"
"Mrs. Spencer?"
She smiled. "Good morning, Dr. Andrews. Do you have my test results?" For several weeks, she had been feeling badly with no clear reason as to why. Finally Shawn had convinced her to go to the doctor. That was almost a week ago, and they had been awaiting the results since then.
"I do. Juliet, it's cancer."
The phone slipped from her fingers and fell to the floor. But she didn't see it.
Shawn poked his head into the kitchen. "Morning, Jules." But then he saw the look on her face, and his heart dropped. "Juliet?" He rushed to her side.
As soon as his arms went around her, she buried her face in his chest and clung to him desperately. "It's cancer, Shawn…" she whispered before a sob bubbled up in her throat.
His stomach did a sickening flip, but he hid that from her and held her even tighter. She needed him to be strong for her.
"I'm here, Jules. I'm here."
She dropped the phone and burst into tears
The doctor just confirmed her fears
Her husband held it in and held her tight
Cancer don't discriminate
Or care if you're just thirty-eight
With three kids who need you in their lives
That night, after tucking each of the kids into bed, Juliet climbed into bed with Shawn and rested her head on his chest. After crying for a while in his arms, she had finally pulled herself together long enough to call her doctor back to figure out what they were going to do. He had told her it was stage two breast cancer and fairly aggressive. But she was young, and they were catching it early. So he booked her for surgery first thing in the morning.
Shawn wrapped his arms tightly around his wife, his thoughts all over the place. She had to beat this. Their children needed her, and so did he.
She snuggled deeper into his arms. "Who's taking the kids in the morning?" she whispered.
"My dad, Gus, and Lassie all volunteered. But I think I'm going to drop them off with my dad." He had the feeling that he would need Gus with him while he waited at the hospital, and Lassiter would probably want to be nearby, as well. His dad was the best option.
"They'll like that," she murmured.
His hand moved gently over her hair. "Yeah, they will."
She sniffled quietly. The plan tomorrow was for the surgeon to go in and remove all of the cancerous cells. What if something went wrong? What if she died under anesthesia, or they couldn't get all of the cancer out of her body? She couldn't bear the thought of her family forced to watch her die slowly in front of them. But the thought of dying at all and leaving them alone tore her up inside.
Shawn knew the moment she started to cry, and it broke his heart. "Jules, it's going to be okay."
"You don't know that…"
He sighed. "Maybe not, but whatever happens, I'm going to be there with you. You won't go through a second of this alone."
"Promise?"
Reaching down, he gently guided her face upward until they were face to face. Then he kissed her softly. "You are my life, Juliet," he whispered when they broke apart. "You're my best friend, and the woman I love. As long as I'm alive, you'll never be alone."
He was terrified as well, but as long as he had her, they were going to be okay.
He said, "I know that you're afraid
And I am too
But you'll never be alone
I promise you."
She suddenly closed the distance again and kissed him deeply. Just a few short years ago, she had been convinced that he would never grow up. But all of that changed when they started dating, and when he proposed, he had shown her what kind of man he could be. That was over five years ago. Now they had a life, and three children that they would die for.
He groaned softly, surprised by her passion. But he understood it. Any time that she was emotionally shaken to the core, she sought out reassurance that only he seemed capable of giving. He slipped his hand under her shirt and gently caressed the skin he found there.
Shivering, she helped him remove her shirt and pants. Then she settled into his arms, needing to know that he still wanted and needed her as much as she needed him.
He gently eased her onto her back and kissed her neck. "I love you, Juliet," he whispered against her skin.
Her eyes closed. "I love you, too, Shawn."
Smiling softly, he pressed into her and gave her the reassurance they both desperately needed. And when they were both satisfied, he drew her into his arms and cradled her lovingly as he waited for dawn to approach.
When you're weak, I'll be strong
When you let go, I'll hold on
And when you need to cry, I swear that I
Will be there to dry your eyes
When you feel lost, scared to death
Like you can't take one more step
Just take my hand, together we can do it
I'm gonna love you through it
The next afternoon, Shawn sat by his wife's bed, holding her hand tightly. The surgery had taken over four hours, two more than her doctor had originally estimated. But when he came out to speak to Shawn, he understood why. There had been more cancerous cells than they originally thought, and the surgeon had been forced to remove more tissue than they'd planned. But Juliet had come through it amazingly well. Now he was just waiting for her to wake up.
She finally stirred almost two hours later. Shawn was still by her side, and he knew the moment she began to wake up. He leaned forward in his chair. "Jules?"
Her eyes flickered open. "Shawn…?"
He nodded tearfully, bringing her hand up to his mouth and kissing it lovingly. "I'm here, baby."
"The surgery…"
"Everything went well. They got it all out."
Even as groggy as she was, she could sense the hesitation in her voice. "What is it, Shawn?"
Swallowing hard, Shawn leaned forward and ran his hand over her thick blond hair. "Jules…the doctors… they had to take more than they said they would."
Feeling sick, Juliet pushed her blanket away and stared at herself. Tears started to roll down her cheeks as her mind finally registered what her heart had suspected the moment she looked at Shawn.
With a soft sigh, Shawn got onto the bed with her. Then he wrapped his arms firmly around her, pulling her close and holding her firmly to his chest.
She turned and buried her face in his chest, sobbing quietly.
"I've got you, Jules." He kissed her head. "I'm not going to leave you. We'll get you through this." His hand moved over her back in slow, soothing patterns.
She didn't say a word, but his presence said it all. And as long as she had him to lean on, she had a chance.
She made it through the surgery fine
They said they caught it just in time
But they had to take more than they planned
And now it's forced smiles and baggy shirts
To hide what the cancer took from her
She just wants to feel like a woman again
A few weeks after the surgery that saved her life, Juliet was exhausted. Each day was a struggle, a fight for normalcy that she was slowly losing. She felt like a part of her had been stolen, something that she hid with baggy shirts and forced smiles.
One night, after putting the kids to bed, Shawn walked into the bedroom to find Juliet sitting on their bed and crying softly. Worried, he quickly moved to her and knelt down in front of her. "Jules?" He laid his hands on her legs. "Talk to me, Jules."
She lifted her tearstained face, and the pain he saw in her eyes broke his heart.
Without hesitation, he reached up and cradled her face in his hands. The touch comforted them both, but tears continued to roll down her cheeks.
"I don't think I can keep doing this," she finally whispered, leaning into his hands. "I feel…so sick…and it's never going to get better…"
Getting to his feet, Shawn sat down beside her. Then he took her into his arms and held her like he would never let her go. "That's why I'm here, Jules," he finally whispered, kissing her head. "You have me. You always will."
Sobbing softly, she buried her face in his broad chest. Her arm went around him, and she clung to him with all the strength she had.
Moving slowly, he laid down with her. As her sobs slowly quieted, he ran his hand under her shirt, over her firm abdomen.
She watched him, still shaking and unsure.
This was what she needed. A confirmation that he still loved and needed her. He wasn't good with words, but he was good with actions. So he kissed her deeply as his hand continued to move over her soft skin.
The kiss took her by surprise, but she welcomed it wholeheartedly. Sometimes it seemed he knew exactly what she needed better than she did.
Breathing deeply, Shawn guided Juliet onto her back, then kissed his way from her neck to her clavicle. He needed to remind her that, as long as he was alive, he would love and want her.
And he did.
She said, "I don't think
I can do this anymore."
He took her in his arms and said
"That's what my love is for."
Afterward, they lay in a tangled mess. Shawn's head was on her shoulder, and her fingers absently moved through his thick, damp hair.
Silence reigned supreme, until Shawn lifted his head and smiled at her.
She returned the smile. "What?"
"You're amazing, Juliet." He kissed her nose. "And I'm lucky to have you."
"I'm lucky to have you, Shawn." She captured his lips in another sweet kiss.
He just grinned and held her close.
When you're weak, I'll be strong
When you let go, I'll hold on
And when you need to cry, I swear that I
Will be there to dry your eyes
When you feel lost, scared to death
Like you can't take one more step
Just take my hand, together we can do it
I'm gonna love you through it
A year later, Juliet found herself the subject of a surprise party at the station. Without her knowledge, Shawn had arranged the whole thing to celebrate the fact that she'd been in remission for a full year.
And in that moment, standing among her friends and family, she had never felt so loved. Henry and Chief Vick held Michael and Jude, and Cecilia had her little arms wrapped firmly around Lassiter's leg. McNabb and Gus stood close, both grinning widely, and Shawn had his arms wrapped firmly around her waist.
There was a cake placed on her desk, with a single candle in the center. It was very simple, but the meaning behind it was everything to Juliet.
Lassiter leaned down and picked Cecilia up.
Delighted, Cecilia made herself comfortable in his arms, one little hand clutching a worn stuffed rabbit.
Juliet looked around at her family with a warm smile.
Letting go of her, Shawn lit the single candle, then grinned at Juliet. "Make a wish, baby."
She shrugged. "Why? I already have everything I want." She had her family, her friends, her health, and Shawn.
What more could she want?
Sensing that his parents were busy, Michael squirmed away from his grandfather and ran over to the desk. Jumping up, he blew out the candle with a mischievous grin.
Shawn laughed. "Michael!"
"Don't scold the boy, Spencer. He can't help that you're his father and a terrible example." Lassiter smirked at the look on Spencer's face.
Cecilia frowned and wagged a chubby finger at him. "Be nice to Daddy!"
The group erupted into laughter, and Lassiter just scowled.
When this road gets too long
I'll be the rock you lean on
Just take my hand, together we can do it
I'm gonna love you through it
Shawn and Juliet laughed together and cut the first piece of cake. Much like their wedding, Shawn started to feed her a small piece. But she was way ahead of him, and she pushed the cake into his face.
For a moment, Shawn was stunned. Then he growled and grabbed her by the waist. Juliet was laughing too hard to fight him, and he held her tight.
"Just wait until we get home," he growled into her ear.
She snickered. "I can't wait."
He held her even tighter, and as their lips collided, Lassiter growled.
"Get a room!"
I'm gonna love you through it
I'm gonna love you through it
The End.
A/N: Thanks for reading! 500 stories, here I come!